What are everyone's thoughts on high school???

[Horsegirl]

It's my first year next year, and I'm just wondering if anyone has any pointers for me? I mean, most people I talk to say "Oh, you'll love high school!" Those people are probably wrong for two reasons.
1. They are my parents so they are just trying to make me less nervous.
2. They have no idea what it's like to be autistic.
So of anyone has any suggestions please post

 

[Mr Allen]

I hated all 5 years of it.

Thank heck it's about 26 years now since I left aged just turned 16.

 

[Isadoorian]

1) Don't believe the "High School will be the best Years of your Life!" people; it's a classical BS catch phrase and they're just trying to hype you up; it gets rather boring after a time. Also no, you DO NOT have to nor are you expected to, use Cursive/Handwriting. Some teachers may ask that you do because they're that old school, so if you aren't very good at it, I say Practice until it looks both eligible and acceptable.

2) You will likely be a nervous wreck; I know I was for the first while, as going from a Elementary School to a slightly bigger Middle School was a big change for me, then going from there to the even bigger High School was even more of a challenge for me. I was scared I'd get lost or even end up in the wrong class room; never did happen thankfully.

3) You will lose and make friends along the way. This is to be expected, and is another of Lives unexpected changes. I had 2 Best Friends (which was rare for me as I was basically a social Hermit). 1 guy moved away the beginning of Middle School, 2nd guy I was friends with until he started hanging out with more cringey kids I disliked.

3.5) The last 2 years of HS I never really had many friends and mainly stayed in the back of my library by myself after I finished lunch to pass the time until it was time for the next class.

4) There will be more people in the Halls than you're likely comfortable with, and most of them will move at a snails pace which is one of the most infuriating things to me: "Feel the Burn or Feel my Shoulder, bub!"

5) Try to keep your things in your locker organized; that way you're on your way in n out of classes quicker; as a side note, see if you're able to get a Locker near the Resource/Special Education Room if possible, that way if you need a hand remembering your Locker Combo, you'll have a Teachers aide there to give you assistance as needed.

5.5) Also, I urge you keep your Binder organized, or at least have one for each Subject. You and others who're likely Organization Freaks will very likely have been horrified by the sight of my Binder lmao

6) If you're taking Gym (aka P.E, Physical Education) (which is practically mandatory ), keep Deodorant, and possibly a small bottle of Shampoo and bar of soap (I highly recommend Tea Tree Oil Soap, as it will help with B.O. immensely) along with a quick change of clothes on hand if your Gym Change Rooms have Showers.

I believe that's everything from me

 

[Mary Anne]

Hated high school. It only got better when I found the hippies and stoners, and started using drugs. Then I finally fit in somewhere, but it was never really great either. Hated my entire childhood. I cannot imagine how bad high school is nowadays. It was truly awful back in the 1970s pre-Internet.

 

[Ezra]

I just graduated high school. It was a private special ed school and I did more than half of the last 2 years online. So no really bad experiences. But I'm still glad I'm done with it.

 

[HidinginPlainSight]

- Don't attempt to define your time by the standards of anyone else.
- If you're into something, whether academic or otherwise, stay into it. There is a good chance that someone, somewhere along the line, will give you a hard time of it.
- Don't expect a great deal of understanding from anyone. This is as true of teachers and administrators as it is of the students. You already seem to have a measure of self-awareness. Develop that and get to know yourself even better.
- If you are the type who would like to have friends, (not implying that you don't already have them) then try to have them based on interests or shared sympathies and not an abstract concept of a social ladder.

* I should note, that you are asking this question to a bunch of people who likely had terrible high school experiences; myself included. What I said above are not the things I did, but they things I wish I had done. Don't let all the pessimism you will read here scare you too much. Being autistic will not define your experience but your actions will.

 

[AGXStarseed]

Not wanting to bring a negative opinion in so early, but in my own personal experience High School was generally a horrible experience with bullies been one of my major issues; no matter how many times they are told off, given detention, threatened with temporary/permanent exclusion, they always came back to torment me - which got to the point where I was having nightmares about them.

Again, I'm sorry to bring up such a negative story. In case something like this happens to you, telling the teachers is pretty much useless as there's little they can do (usually as it boils down to your word against theirs) and fighting back will most likely get you in trouble.
As such, I recommend one of two options:

1. Learn Krav Maga or a similar martial art; This is not to attack the people who may pick on you, but to build up your confidence and ensure you have a means of defending yourself if someone does attack you.
I say Krav Maga as it is a 'modern martial art' that teaches you how to end a fight quickly and effectively (even teaching methods for disarming attackers who are weilding weapons, etc.), whilst other martial arts like Karate and Judo aren't very effective in 'street fights'.

2. Capture any bullying on video; Nowadays you can buy small/hidden cameras that you can use for recording any incidents that occur. That way, when it comes to the "You vs. Us" scenario with the bullies, you will have proof that you are telling the truth and evidence against them. Here's an example of such a device: https://www.menkind.co.uk/spy-camera-pen

 

[Isadoorian]

no matter how many times they are told off, given detention, threatened with temporary/permanent exclusion, they always came back to torment me

Nothing like the classic so called "Zero Tolerance" policy; my one friend who I still keep in touch with was a bit troubled, but one day he was talking to his mom in the foyer and another kid came up and punched him. My friend got suspended while the Provoker didn't get anything; was scott free

 

[AGXStarseed]

Nothing like the classic so called "Zero Tolerance" policy; my one friend who I still keep in touch with was a bit troubled, but one day he was talking to his mom in the foyer and another kid came up and punched him. My friend got suspended while the Provoker didn't get anything; was scott free

Reminds me of a certain infamous clip from Australia of a boy punching another kid several times, only for the victim to finally retaliate when he grabs the bully and lifts him up before slamming him into the floor. Afterwards, the bully, victim and the kid who recorded it an put it on YouTube all got suspended.

What annoyed me most is when you watch the video, the kids are all standing around and watching it happen, with some even cheering on the bully.
As soon as the victim retaliates and slams the bully into the ground, though, everyone gasps and treats it like its terrible that the victim has decided enough was enough, to the point where one older boy has a go at the victim and nearly follows him until an older girl tells him to back off.

Here's the clip:

 

[Isadoorian]

Reminds me of a certain infamous clip from Australia of a boy punching another kid several times, only for the victim to finally retaliate when he grabs the bully and lifts him up before slamming him into the floor. Afterwards, the bully, victim and the kid who recorded it an put it on YouTube all got suspended.

What annoyed me most is when you watch the video, the kids are all standing around and watching it happen, with some even cheering on the bully.
As soon as the victim retaliates and slams the bully into the ground, though, everyone gasps and treats it like its terrible that the victim has decided enough was enough, to the point where one older boy has a go at the victim and nearly follows him until an older girl tells him to back off.

Here's the clip:

Yes, that will always be a classic to me; astounded me the first time I saw it lol

Especially because the can hear the friggin impact; I don't remember but I think the kid suffered either a broken collar bone or a dislocated shoulder for that; but either way it served the little puke right; and gave him a life lesson: Never attempt to beat someone bigger than yourself ever again

 

[Bolletje]

High school wasn’t great but it didn’t suck either. People mostly just left me alone which suited me just fine. Over the course of 6 years I gathered a group of misfits and outcasts around me so I ended up with a close group of friends in the end.

 

[AGXStarseed]

Yes, that will always be a classic to me; astounded me the first time I saw it lol

Especially because the can hear the friggin impact; I don't remember but I think the kid suffered either a broken collar bone or a dislocated shoulder for that; but either way it served the lil bastard right; and to never attempt to beat someone bigger than yourself ever again

You might want to censor the B word in your comment like this (B*****d) otherwise you may get in trouble.

 

[Illumination]

I'm still in High School, I am going into Senior year, but sadly I cannot give you much pointers as I go to a online charter school.

 

[Observant]

Well, I don't miss the constant bomb threats or the gangs in my first school (Bloods, Cholos, large groups of Filipinos, and Crips). Usually in a fight you didn't fight one person. you fought >3, and one or all of them are carrying some sort of improvised weapon. You learned to make a friend and stick with a group if you wanted protection (I was in JROTC so we had our own group). A lot of teachers didn't care and our school was underfunded (our Math teacher was a well-known alcoholic), but there were a few who really did go out of their way to help the students.

Food was overpriced for the quality that you got, so I usually just ditched and went to a nearby Mexican restaurant and got a Carne Asada burrito, which, for the same price, was an order of magnitude better.

After my second year I transferred to another school where the demographic was predominantly White and Chaldean. The neighorhoods were much cleaner, but you had groups like Goths, Chaldeans (some fancied themselves as "Chaldean Mafia", and acted more like a fan club of The Godfather), Geeks/Nerds, Jocks/Rich kids (went hand-in-hand, and were usually all-white and drove those ridiculous lifted trucks with an off-road kit, but no way in hell would they ever go off-roading), and a white supremacist "gang" who called themselves "Peckerwoods", but were really junkies. Oddly enough I got into more fights there than I did at my first school. The quality of the teachers was much higher, and there was air conditioning.

My grades were pretty bad in both environments due to not having been diagnosed, having to skip meals, and getting bullied, and I regularly ditched to avoid getting into fights. Most people say that if you fight back people will leave you alone, that wasn't the case with me, as I had to fight their friends too. I ended up getting a GED and joining the military in '03, then got my High School Diploma while in service.

In short: my life was hell. I learned more about pugilism and how to survive in a hostile environment than the subjects taught in-school, and I learned how to teach myself Science, Math, Literature, etc. by reading on my own.

And now I am in a UC school studying Computer Engineering and Applied Mathematics, though I didn't make it out of high school unscathed, and I still carry a lot of that trauma to this day.

 

[HidinginPlainSight]

Things may have changed a lot since I was in school, but I don't think street fighting is her biggest concern here.

Perhaps I'm more out of touch than I realize though.

 

[ainely]

I still go to high school, I'll start my twelfth grade in September (in Italy there's the thirteenth grade so)
I'm Italian so I don't really know American high schools, except for the movies but I prefer high school to middle school because people are more mature and the subjects that I study are very interesting here. (I chose them)
despite this it was really difficult at first, I was isolated by many because seen as strange, I was really upset and I even lost all my middle school friends. People have been telling me ''made your group'' and I couldn't so I was so alone.
In the end, now after 4 years I think you don't have to be in a group because those who really want to know you, they just do it!
There are also negative aspects such as positives.
For example, I always jump P.E class lol and sometimes I get reports for my discipline

 

[SunnyDay16]

Everyone's high school experience varies, depending on how "high up" the social ladder they are and such. My personal experience wasn't horrible, it was just OK. I guess I am lucky because some folks on here had traumatic expeirences in high school, with bullying and such. I only had one real friend, and he wasn't in all of my classes so I was pretty much alone. A few people did chat me up sometimes, but they weren't friends, just acquaintances. Other than that, I was mostly invisible, but that didn't really bug me because I wasn't thinking about the social part.

I did bond with a few of the teachers though, so that was good.

 

[OkRad]

High school was hard but not because of the people, but because of all my disorders.

The other factor was the amount of dysfunctional adults telling me and my family what they thought best. One of the hardest things of high school was not being old enough to protect myself from the adults in my life who thought they knew it all. I am not talking about parents. They have a right to guide us and if they are good parents, they will always have your best interest at heart. I am talking about "experts" who have no idea what they are doing.

Now that I am older, if I only knew how incredibly dysfunctional people really are! Be careful about the people who are going to give you advice and realize that if you are Auti/Aspie, then you are very intelligent and can figure things out.

In school, yes, you may have less knowledge and education, but you may have more innate intelligence than those around you who may not be ND. This means you have a great capacity to figure life out. Try to stay calm when you are stressed and know you can think in ways others cannot.

It is not a source of pride because god knows many of us with Aut/Asp also have so many other difficulties it can be crushing. But I notice when I am on this board that people here have gone through the impossible and survived in ways NTs would not have. Through creativity, persistence, relying on special interests, thinking, figuring.......they survive and some even thrive.

I am not saying disrespect anyone, either, or that rules don't apply. Always show elders respect and be nice. My point is that much of the chaos you will endure anywhere is based in a whole lot of ignorance. Rely on your innate intelligence because you have a lot of it.

To illustrate, here is a funny story if you like. It happened to my little brother who is not fully ND but also not NT, either.

He was in high school and it was frustrating to him because he did not want to go to college. So he spent his time being kind and connecting to people and helping people, and being kind to those who had no friends. He had all the friends in the world and was "in" but he would intentionally find the poor guy who was picked on and hurting and go and tell him to come have lunch with him.

If his friends looked askance, he would use his logic and explain how that person was awesome and why were they wanting to lose out on such a cool friend? Then his other friends who just start to accept the new person. He has a knack for that. And he meant it. It was not just to feel sorry for the kid. He loves people! So he was doing all this good in high school for no other reason than to relieve suffering and bring as many people into happiness as he could. I felt that was a noble thing to do with one's life. Especially since he was trapped in a place he hated to be!

Well, one day, the "guidance counsellor" called him in. The guy sat there smoking, telling my brother he was screwing up his life. Now if you want to smoke, that is a personal decision. I am not knocking that per se other than it's not healthy...... My point is, right there, in the open, this guy was blowing smoke in my brother's face, telling him how to live his life. It was not appropriate. The guy had serious issues.

My brother turned out fine. He still goes out of his way to help people and is very different in his ability to know and see things. He figured out how to get through and help others and be happy even though it could have gone the other way. He was little and very skinny and had dyslexia. But his ND side watched and figured and knew stuff that his peers and elders did not.

So trust your intelligence and your brain and your mind! You have gifts!

 

[Progster]

This is confusing... the thread title asks about high school, but there is a poll about Temple Grandin's thinking like animals theory. I'm going to stick with the title of the thread, as that is what's being discussed.

High school. Mixed opinions - I went through bad patches, and other ok patches. I liked some subjects, but not others. I felt that I was marginalised and that I didn't fit in, and went through a period of depression where I hardly spoke to anyone. I was glad to leave. At the end there was a prom that they all went to, I never went. Didn't see the point.

 

[Progster]

About Temple Grandin's thinking like animals theory... @Horsegirl perhaps you could make this into a new thread? It's a very interesting topic.
I think that we sense like animals rather than think like them, because animals don't think. Thinking is a human thing.