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What I’m really thinking: the adult with autism

AGXStarseed

Well-Known Member
(Not written by me)

I don’t want a cure: I value the unique insights, talents and attention to detail


679.jpg

‘The public at large still believe autism is found mainly in little boys.’ Illustration: Lo Cole for the Guardian


Last year I took some tests at my local adult autism centre and it emerged that I tick all the boxes for Asperger’s. I am in my 40s, and I am not alone. There has been a huge surge in adults, especially women, tested in the last five years.

Why was it not noticed sooner? I was a very odd child: I rarely played with or talked to other children in my early years, out of choice, and spent most of my teens ostracised as I didn’t understand others’ social rules. But it was the 1970s, I was a girl, and autism was never mentioned; indeed, the diagnostic criteria until recently were based on presentation in boys. Do I wish I’d been identified sooner? Yes and no: I’d have liked some help, but not to have been limited by the label.

I haven’t done badly in life. I have a degree and a good job, a partner, a house and a small but valued social circle. Now I have to come to terms with having what other people call a “disability”, a “mental disorder”, a “syndrome”, and which some people would like to see “cured.” I don’t want a cure: I value the unique insights, talents and attention to detail that Asperger’s has given me.

The public at large still believe autism is found mainly in little boys. I can’t “come out” at work for fear of being thought of as either stupid or Rain Man. It’s much harder than coming out as gay, which I did in my 20s. Thank goodness for the online community, my local autism theatre group and Autscape, a conference I recently attended run by and for autistic people. There I could proudly say I’m identified as neuro-diverse. Autism rights have a long way to go, and I’d like to think I can, in a small way, be a pioneer for neurodiversity.


Source: What I’m really thinking: the adult with autism
 
D*** straight! No cure is needed, thank you very much. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

I do wish there were a cure for being an a*****e, though, but then I guess then there'd be no NTs at all.
 
The cure needs to be in how we are treated but as dragon says Aholes will be aholes and aholes gonna ahole.
 
D*** straight! No cure is needed, thank you very much. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

I do wish there were a cure for being an a*****e, though, but then I guess then there'd be no NTs at all.

Dying laughing right now... I cant write what I'm thinking...
 
(Not written by me)

I don’t want a cure: I value the unique insights, talents and attention to detail


679.jpg

‘The public at large still believe autism is found mainly in little boys.’ Illustration: Lo Cole for the Guardian


Last year I took some tests at my local adult autism centre and it emerged that I tick all the boxes for Asperger’s. I am in my 40s, and I am not alone. There has been a huge surge in adults, especially women, tested in the last five years.

Why was it not noticed sooner? I was a very odd child: I rarely played with or talked to other children in my early years, out of choice, and spent most of my teens ostracised as I didn’t understand others’ social rules. But it was the 1970s, I was a girl, and autism was never mentioned; indeed, the diagnostic criteria until recently were based on presentation in boys. Do I wish I’d been identified sooner? Yes and no: I’d have liked some help, but not to have been limited by the label.

I haven’t done badly in life. I have a degree and a good job, a partner, a house and a small but valued social circle. Now I have to come to terms with having what other people call a “disability”, a “mental disorder”, a “syndrome”, and which some people would like to see “cured.” I don’t want a cure: I value the unique insights, talents and attention to detail that Asperger’s has given me.

The public at large still believe autism is found mainly in little boys. I can’t “come out” at work for fear of being thought of as either stupid or Rain Man. It’s much harder than coming out as gay, which I did in my 20s. Thank goodness for the online community, my local autism theatre group and Autscape, a conference I recently attended run by and for autistic people. There I could proudly say I’m identified as neuro-diverse. Autism rights have a long way to go, and I’d like to think I can, in a small way, be a pioneer for neurodiversity.


Source: What I’m really thinking: the adult with autism


I LIKE IT! A LOT.... : )
 
The public at large still believe autism is found mainly in little boys. I can’t “come out” at work for fear of being thought of as either stupid or Rain Man. It’s much harder than coming out as gay, which I did in my 20s.

Just goes to show how far we still need to go in terms of understanding and acceptance by the public at large. People don't like to discuss things that make them uncomfortable. I can't imagine coming out as gay 20 years ago would be easy to do, but this individual said it was much easier than potentially coming out as autistic. So the autistic community is less understood and accepted than another community that is still often not always accepted or understood. Not surprising why many of us struggle with anxiety and depression.
 
Just goes to show how far we still need to go in terms of understanding and acceptance by the public at large. People don't like to discuss things that make them uncomfortable. I can't imagine coming out as gay 20 years ago would be easy to do, but this individual said it was much easier than potentially coming out as autistic. So the autistic community is less understood and accepted than another community that is still often not always accepted or understood. Not surprising why many of us struggle with anxiety and depression.

You picked up on the same thing I did...

I'm not gay (but have zero against people who are), but I would rather come out and say I am gay publicly than have to say I am Autistic. There is just this look, this feeling, this loss that emulates from some people that let me know they feel I am less of a human.

In some ways I may be less, but in other ways I am more. I am aware and can sense things others cant... I can learn things others cant. I can feel and hear things others cant. I can be happy not following their stupid ass status quo. I can be content being alone and not wrapped up in peoples circles of gossip that destroy other people. I can be quiet while others just seem to have to rattle off stuff that shouldn't be said. I observe while others just grasp at whatever catches their attention. I watch people trample life, and disrespect this gift we are given and it makes me sad inside. In that comes the problems that overwhelm me that makes others think, I'm weak, stupid, or retarded.

I have to deal 24/7 with me not fitting in a reality that often gets distorted, loud, smelly, harsh, and spend all my energy trying to not to seem like a freak (and even fail at that sometimes). So... I have to use all my energy just to survive while others get to use their access energy to enjoy and even misuse the time we are given.

Sure I want to be "normal"... Who doesn't? But if normal means being cruel to others and becoming ungrateful for the life I have been granted, then I am good with being the stupid one. : )

Maybe its just the word "Autistic'. I don't even like that degrading word. It just sounds sad, lonely, messed up - maybe thats what others sense also.
 
You picked up on the same thing I did...

I'm not gay (but have zero against people who are), but I would rather come out and say I am gay publicly than have to say I am Autistic. There is just this look, this feeling, this loss that emulates from some people that let me know they feel I am less of a human.

In some ways I may be less, but in other ways I am more. I am aware and can sense things others cant... I can learn things others cant. I can feel and hear things others cant. I can be happy not following their stupid ass status quo. I can be content being alone and not wrapped up in peoples circles of gossip that destroy other people. I can be quiet while others just seem to have to rattle off stuff that shouldn't be said. I observe while others just grasp at whatever catches their attention. I watch people trample life, and disrespect this gift we are given and it makes me sad inside. In that comes the problems that overwhelm me that makes others think, I'm weak, stupid, or retarded.

I have to deal 24/7 with me not fitting in a reality that often gets distorted, loud, smelly, harsh, and spend all my energy trying to not to seem like a freak (and even fail at that sometimes). So... I have to use all my energy just to survive while others get to use their access energy to enjoy and even misuse the time we are given.

Sure I want to be "normal"... Who doesn't? But if normal means being cruel to others and becoming ungrateful for the life I have been granted, then I am good with being the stupid one. : )

Maybe its just the word "Autistic'. I don't even like that degrading word. It just sounds sad, lonely, messed up - maybe thats what others sense also.

So many things you say nail, Exactly how it is from my perspective. Could it be similar add on's to the AS. ?
 
Maybe its just the word "Autistic'. I don't even like that degrading word. It just sounds sad, lonely, messed up - maybe thats what others sense also.

This comment made me think. I wonder how much that feeling comes from the typical stereotype of what Autism is or looks like. If humans embraced differences instead of freaking out and showing hostility then when Autism was first identified it would have a completely different 'feeling' maybe?

I don't actually mind the term Autism. I guess the negative feelings I associate with it would be how NT's are so judgmental and close minded (not all of them I know) that using any term associated with autism/autistic/ASD/aspergers/etc is likely to met with negative reactions.
 
This comment made me think. I wonder how much that feeling comes from the typical stereotype of what Autism is or looks like. If humans embraced differences instead of freaking out and showing hostility then when Autism was first identified it would have a completely different 'feeling' maybe?

I don't actually mind the term Autism. I guess the negative feelings I associate with it would be how NT's are so judgmental and close minded (not all of them I know) that using any term associated with autism/autistic/ASD/aspergers/etc is likely to met with negative reactions.

Maybe your right... I think sadly big business organizations set forth their "poster children" who are often way down on the spectrum.... Please, please, don't take this at me making any sort of jab at those wonderful kids (never in a million years)... If I have a jab its at the organizations that grossly misrepresent the facts. In my head, these big organizations are basically exploiting these kids while pressing a word picture in to the minds of unknowing masses. Of course its to get them to send in big donations and get them good lobbying positions in political circles and more pull in the corporate world.

Sadly many times a very small percent of this big money even goes to the people who need it most... Thats why they need lobbyist to get the government involved to open its purse strings. Most of their money is spent on advertising, administration, massive complexes, technology and office equipment, massive employee bases, and of course the full benefits packages and bonuses, trips and conferences to conduct these big businesses.

Sorry, but its not common to see a normal looking girl, or boy, lady, or man when they are portraying Autism. I get it... Its a business, but they often go off the deep end on the portrayal of the spectrum to drum up big money and power. So, when a basically normal looking freak like me comes along, non of what the masses have been programmed with even fits. It presents confusion and a conflicting view in their minds.

Thats my sad two cents and I could be wrong, but that is just how I feel about it deep inside.
 

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