Dominic
Member
Hello all, my names Dominic and I was born in England but have lived these past 14 years in the Netherlands.
After gaining 2 degrees in law and starting a masters in Philosophy, I have spent the last 10 years working as a sub contractor in the building industry. I always knew I'd never be able to stand in front of a judge to argue a case because of my social anxiety issues. I now work mostly alone which is fine and the money is good but i miss a mental challenge.
After finishing my first 2nd degree i did work for a multinational which ended in disaster when the ceo asked me whether i enjoyed my job in front of a group of people and i replied "no" and then went on a 5 minute tirade of everything that i found disagreeing about my role and the company. I thought i was just being honest!
I have been in a relationship for the last 15 years with a Dutch girl i met in Australia. One of the first things i said to her was "if your looking for somebody who likes holding hands and showing public signs of affection. .. im not the guy for you! ". I embarked on the relationship as a sorry of experiment thinking that, as all holiday romances inevitably do, it would come to an end. It didn't and 15 years later were now married and have a son.
Our wedding was a very pragmatic affair. Monday morning you can get married for free at the town hall here. There were only 2 witnesses present, no photos, no party, no rings, no honeymoon and certainly no merry making! 15 minutes in and out and i was back at work by 9:30.
Let's see what else...i grew up a Catholic, went to Catholic school and all my family/friends were religious. I, however abandoned faith the moment a science book was thrust into my hands. I find other people's acceptance of faith very interesting when i look at the same "evidence" or lack of it and arrive at another conclusion. This along with physics and mathematics in one form or another are my "special topics". It was a very strange experience growing up being the only non believer at school and home and that feeling of being lied to has scarred my thoughts ever since. I therefore find it very difficult to accept what somebody says until I've verified the facts for myself.
Unfortunately, my special topics are the ones that potentially cause the most offence when in discussion with others. Whenever religion is mentioned in my presence it is usually followed by a kick under the table or a grasp of the arm by my wife accompanied by a silently conveyed glance meaning "keep your mouth shut". For my part im just curious and mean no offence. I'm not from the Richard Dawkins militant form of athiesm... i respect everybody's opinions as long as they respect my logic.
At this point in life i don't have any friends and very few colleagues and can go months without having a meaningful conversation with anybody other than my wife or child (to be fair, i have absolutely nothing in common with my wife, no shared interests etc...). I don't know any other aspies but would like to see if socially i get along better with my "own kind". I've never really been part of a group so I'm interested to see how this pans out.
Peace to all...
After gaining 2 degrees in law and starting a masters in Philosophy, I have spent the last 10 years working as a sub contractor in the building industry. I always knew I'd never be able to stand in front of a judge to argue a case because of my social anxiety issues. I now work mostly alone which is fine and the money is good but i miss a mental challenge.
After finishing my first 2nd degree i did work for a multinational which ended in disaster when the ceo asked me whether i enjoyed my job in front of a group of people and i replied "no" and then went on a 5 minute tirade of everything that i found disagreeing about my role and the company. I thought i was just being honest!
I have been in a relationship for the last 15 years with a Dutch girl i met in Australia. One of the first things i said to her was "if your looking for somebody who likes holding hands and showing public signs of affection. .. im not the guy for you! ". I embarked on the relationship as a sorry of experiment thinking that, as all holiday romances inevitably do, it would come to an end. It didn't and 15 years later were now married and have a son.
Our wedding was a very pragmatic affair. Monday morning you can get married for free at the town hall here. There were only 2 witnesses present, no photos, no party, no rings, no honeymoon and certainly no merry making! 15 minutes in and out and i was back at work by 9:30.
Let's see what else...i grew up a Catholic, went to Catholic school and all my family/friends were religious. I, however abandoned faith the moment a science book was thrust into my hands. I find other people's acceptance of faith very interesting when i look at the same "evidence" or lack of it and arrive at another conclusion. This along with physics and mathematics in one form or another are my "special topics". It was a very strange experience growing up being the only non believer at school and home and that feeling of being lied to has scarred my thoughts ever since. I therefore find it very difficult to accept what somebody says until I've verified the facts for myself.
Unfortunately, my special topics are the ones that potentially cause the most offence when in discussion with others. Whenever religion is mentioned in my presence it is usually followed by a kick under the table or a grasp of the arm by my wife accompanied by a silently conveyed glance meaning "keep your mouth shut". For my part im just curious and mean no offence. I'm not from the Richard Dawkins militant form of athiesm... i respect everybody's opinions as long as they respect my logic.
At this point in life i don't have any friends and very few colleagues and can go months without having a meaningful conversation with anybody other than my wife or child (to be fair, i have absolutely nothing in common with my wife, no shared interests etc...). I don't know any other aspies but would like to see if socially i get along better with my "own kind". I've never really been part of a group so I'm interested to see how this pans out.
Peace to all...
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