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Who say's we can't do small talk and conversations?

Tony Ramirez

Forever Alone Aspie
V.I.P Member
Basically since I have to start over in the making new friends department but this time I am no longer in a toxic environment with toxic people which helps and I kind of already connected with a few people already. One possible female ASD. But anyway, I just don't understand why they say this. Okay I understand it can be much more difficult yes in a group setting which I do find especially the more people you have. But one on one I am finding it quite easy, and you are not even going to believe this if I tell you but as long as the person will actually engage in a conversation with me, not say two words and leave or sound uninteresting then want to leave, but I actually find women even attractive ones easier to talk to. Even my newest yoga teacher, who is attractive. I talked with her after class for a good 10+ minutes about various yoga topics, even about herself and her yoga journey. Even having a private morning class with her, I did not feel not one bit unconvertible. Believe it or not, if it was a male teacher I would not be able to talk to him after class and feel more uncomfortable after class. Really confuses me since over 20 years ago I was so afraid of girls I actually use to run away from them when they approached or try to talk to me.
 
We are different, so i myself would not accept humility in this life. This life should not be difficult. People NT and ASD if they are weak make it difficult.

Edit: We can talk and play with good people, i think being serious is better. But it is your life.
 
I don't know if it's just me but many of the people that I meet there are interested in stuff that appeals to autistic like D&D, Disney movies, musicals, anime, Star Wars, Minecraft especially the women no joke really. I love it that they similar interests in what I like.
 
My Zen Teacher told me: Great doubt leads to Great enlightenment
Another senior person said: I've thought i've been enlighten before, now also, but i don't know for sure
Khabib said: Always have "beginner" mentality, be humble
 
Glad you have moved on regarding your thoughts about woman. It seems like you view your life differently. You have boundaries, (goodbye to toxic church people). There are nice woman. There are not so nice woman. But you are navigating the journey. :)
 
Also, people are so varied that a big category of people like a gender category couldn't possibly be all the same or similar. We are all different. Some are super confident and wonderfully multi-talented, others are quiet and only like tractors. We are all different whatever gender or other categories we are in or assigned.

Recently you have taken some great and brave steps to explore and to follow your interests, and people enjoy your company, of course they do, partly because you show you care about them and are interested in them as individuals. Sounds like you are getting pretty good at yoga too. Which isn't easy.
 
It's nice for you to be ok with small talk and conversations with new people. Bravo!
Some of us just ain't. I can pretty much be myself and discuss topics here because it's essentially mind to mind exchanges without the distractions of having to monitor and control my meat puppet while at the same time paying attention to someone else's meat puppet.
But silence-filling unuseful (and tedious) verbal exchange (small talk) - I'll pass thank you.
 
Why am I so comfortable around females? Really I was just in yoga with the teacher and another one attractive obviously and the yogi asked me about my need pads and I answered no problem. I did not feel one but uncomfortable in that room. Matter of fact last Wednesday when three was a man in yoga class I felt very uncomfortable around him. I wanted to get out of there.

Same with hanging out and church groups and stuff I just now talk with women and feel more comfortable easier. Why? When I use to be petrified only 6 years ago.
 

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