Who worries about weight, calories, etc.

[superboyian]

I have a girlfriend who is CONSTANTLY worrying about her weight and she is NOT even fat.

She became anorexic once last year due to the fact she lost weight and did exactly the same thing like she did last year and lost so much weight.

- She counts calories
- She worries about her weight
- She thinks that I will call her fat and call her ugly
- She tries to eat practically nothing

I only noticed this a couple of days ago that she is repeating the exact same things she did last year and I've tried reassuring her, tried proving to her that she doesn't need to worry but this time, it is not working and I don't want her to be hospitalized and everything and I don't want her to suffer again like she did last time.

Everyone of my mates even tried previously but failed to succeed....

She sent me this text the other day.

Because ian i wanted to fit in the normal world not being bullied 4 being fat. I realise people were into what i looked like not what iam. I wanted better criticism, girls to be jealous of me. I think it the way i mentioned i wasnt hungry.

I know i was a ***** and i will always be.

If anyone is confused with what topic I'm on about, I'm wondering who cares about their body image and weight and at the same time, I'm also asking for help.


Thanks.
- superboyian.

 

[poodlepiglet]

I'll agree that counting calories is not a bad thing as such, if the person does not eat well below the recommended daily intake. It is really easy to become overweight these days the way food companies and stores churn out and promote unhealthy foods rich in sugar and fat. Years ago people were much thinner and ate much less and moved more (so even more reason to count calories)

This is a self esteem issue. Most women tend to imagine themselves fatter than they really are anyway, and the image the magazines and other media promote of the ideals for what a woman should look like is extreme and airbrushed.

I can say I have been through these kinds of thoughts, I was not fat either, I was in very good shape as a young teenager/woman, still I thought I was fat. My boyfriend back then could not understand why I felt like that, but still when I would say I feel fat he would reply by telling me to go and exercise. Now that is not a good move! Saying such things to someone suffering from bad self esteem. What I was hearing was rather a confirmation of me being fat.

The best thing I think you can do, is without her having to prod (now and then out of the blue) tell her she looks great and gorgeous and tell her positive things about her, every now and then, like just saying things like : you're the best, or something... and not at the time she is feeling bad about herself, rather at times she is feeling OK.

Not saying you don't already do that, but I think self esteem can be helped by other people making you feel more positive about yourself.

 

[Sipe]

Teenagers these days... Thats pretty common today, unfortunately.

My common sense says that one should balance eating and exercising and then you won`t get fat. And besides, not ALL kinds of food make fat let`s say vegetables, fruits and bread for example. I`m not a food or health expert but I don`t think those can make you fat no matter how much you eat them. I also blame the media for giving teenagers ideals what a woman should look like to be beautiful and sexy, like poodlepiglet said.

There is another reason why people, especially girls, get fat easily now days. It is the Law of Attraction; If you always think yourself as fat, then guess what? You will become fat. So, I give you another advice, besides the one poodlepiglet gave. Tell her not to think about being fat. Instead, tell her to visualize herself as a thin, beautiful and sexy woman. Why you think many women complains that even tho they exercise like crazy every day they still won`t get into the wight they want? Because they always think about fatness while exercising. It`s only logical.

And it`s seems that your girlfriend thinks that the beauty only comes from the outside. Remind her that the beauty comes from the inside as well. What I mean is, for example; positive attitude, happiness and good nature.

 

[xrobertxdavisx]

I dont care about my size or weight untill i get slagged for it. Like I even find the fatter girls more attractive most of the time. I like being my size but when people say fat and stuff it hurts. Like I went on chat roulette showing me on cam and got sooo many "EWW" and ugly and fat and horrible and laughed at me and disgusted looks and every single person clicked next lol. Things like that depress me about my weight and end up making me eat more lol.

I did try to diet but I just dont find it much use and just happy with me being how I look. Just not how people judge me for looking ugly and fat.

 

[Emor]

That sucks Robert . People are ****ing cunts at times.
Sometimes I count calories but mainly because I just like to count things when I'm bored. I'll also count the hours I spend doing things like on the computer or watching certain tv episodes, etc.
I think if your girlfriend is sure she's fat then telling her she isn't won't really matter because she would have already persuaded herself everyone is lying to her. If I were you I'd just tell her that she's underweight(assuming she is) and there's no way in hell she's fat, and even if she was, which she isn't, you and her friends really don't care how you look, and people don't like people for how they look anyway.
EMZ=]

 

[superboyian]

Teenagers these days... Thats pretty common today, unfortunately. My common sense says that one should balance eating and exercising and then you won`t get fat. And besides, not ALL kinds of food make fat let`s say vegetables, fruits and bread for example. I`m not a food or health expert but I don`t think those can make you fat no matter how much you eat them. I also blame the media for giving teenagers ideals what a woman should look like to be beautiful and sexy, like poodlepiglet said.There is another reason why people, especially girls, get fat easily now days. It is the Law of Attraction; If you always think yourself as fat, then guess what? You will become fat. So, I give you another advice, besides the one poodlepiglet gave. Tell her not to think about being fat. Instead, tell her to visualize herself as a thin, beautiful and sexy woman. Why you think many women complains that even tho they exercise like crazy every day they still won`t get into the wight they want? Because they always think about fatness while exercising. It`s only logical.And it`s seems that your girlfriend thinks that the beauty only comes from the outside. Remind her that the beauty comes from the inside as well. What I mean is, for example; positive attitude, happiness and good nature.

She already is at a pretty good weight but still wants to lose more and I don't want her to go to where she was before when she suddenly became anorexic and also very angry and upset.

The last thing you said actually did make sense to me, but the only problem is that it never really registers in her mind that she is fine as she is already and nothing about her needs to change.

I dont care about my size or weight untill i get slagged for it. Like I even find the fatter girls more attractive most of the time. I like being my size but when people say fat and stuff it hurts. Like I went on chat roulette showing me on cam and got sooo many "EWW" and ugly and fat and horrible and laughed at me and disgusted looks and every single person clicked next lol. Things like that depress me about my weight and end up making me eat more lol. I did try to diet but I just dont find it much use and just happy with me being how I look. Just not how people judge me for looking ugly and fat.

It's cool you don't worry about your size but people are pretty stupid by judging a person by the looks because I actually think your an awesome person and I don't see anything wrong with you, also people like that just likes to make fun of other people but without getting to know the other person which is one of those things that I find pretty annoying what people do.

Also you seem pretty sensitive to comments and sometimes in that situation, you either have to joke about to avoid all of that or don't show the sensitive side of you as I know most people tend to pick on the ones who are sensitive and small, and being pretty tough might save you alot of trouble.

That sucks Robert . People are ****ing cunts at times.Sometimes I count calories but mainly because I just like to count things when I'm bored. I'll also count the hours I spend doing things like on the computer or watching certain tv episodes, etc.I think if your girlfriend is sure she's fat then telling her she isn't won't really matter because she would have already persuaded herself everyone is lying to her. If I were you I'd just tell her that she's underweight(assuming she is) and there's no way in hell she's fat, and even if she was, which she isn't, you and her friends really don't care how you look, and people don't like people for how they look anyway.EMZ=]

The last time I saw her, she looked like she was a little underweight, yes she also obsessively count calories, my god, she actually stopped, but I've just noticed is everytime she goes to mcdonalds and fast food restaurant, she be counting them, it wasn't as bad as she used to.

You described it pretty well aswell at the end and actually that is true, I've only just noticed that with some people.

That's actually pretty much helped me understand more about what she could be thinking.

Are you into psychology?

 

[Emor]

The last time I saw her, she looked like she was a little underweight, yes she also obsessively count calories, my god, she actually stopped, but I've just noticed is everytime she goes to mcdonalds and fast food restaurant, she be counting them, it wasn't as bad as she used to.

You described it pretty well aswell at the end and actually that is true, I've only just noticed that with some people.

That's actually pretty much helped me understand more about what she could be thinking.

Are you into psychology?

At least it's not so bad as before.
Good to know .
Yeah, I am, but only specific disorders, and eating disorders doesn't really interest me at all to be honest. I watch some videos about anorexia by someone I subscribed to on YouTube but only because I like the way she presents her videos and her insights.
Though the way people work and think generally interests me and to an extent is one of the few things I think about obsessively.
EMZ=]

 

[chinaberry]

I used to be fascinated by eating disorders.
I am not bothered about my weight.
But I eat healthily and I always have done. I have the genes for thinness so I wonder if I will ever find out whether I would react badly to being fat?
I prefer fat people.