A confusing breakup and I need help

[jaythos]

Oh man, this is a toughie. I think everyone's thoughts here are valid, and probably come from our own experiences in relationships and how we wish we had been treated / what we could have done differently
It sounds like you may have already made up your mind, and in that regard I suppose we can't stop you from reaching out. I would trust her decision to step away - regardless of what she wants, she just may not be ready for a relationship. It's hard, because it sounds like there wasn't any closure, but sometimes you to trust things are for the best and to respect someone's decision

 

[Callistemon]

 

[Jordy]

Maybe she found someone she liked more than you, I wouldn't take any of the excuses a woman gives when shes decided that she can do better than you all that serious. The "i am overwhelmed" thing was definitely an excuse, it doesn't sound as bad as "i suddenly decided i don't want you anymore, now leave me alone". things like "i need space", "i need to work on myself" is a kind of meaningless verbiage that woman learn from each other to get out of things they don't like without using direct language (being genuine and honest). I know from first hand experience and woman in my family that they can be absolutely heartless and vicious.

There is a group of woman who get super intense and almost love bombing in the initial stage and then just suddenly decide to nope out, they are not mentally well, don't be so naive as to believe anything they say, or that they are as great as you think they are.

 

[Thinx]

Maybe she found someone she liked more than you, I wouldn't take any of the excuses a woman gives when shes decided that she can do better than you all that serious. The "i am overwhelmed" thing was definitely an excuse, it doesn't sound as bad as "i suddenly decided i don't want you anymore, now leave me alone". things like "i need space", "i need to work on myself" is a kind of meaningless verbiage that woman learn from each other to get out of things they don't like without using direct language (being genuine and honest). I know from first hand experience and woman in my family that they can be absolutely heartless and vicious.

There is a group of woman who get super intense and almost love bombing in the initial stage and then just suddenly decide to nope out, they are not mentally well, don't be so naive as to believe anything they say, or that they are as great as you think they are.

You maybe have to allow for the fact that your family may have some problems and may not be typical, as this behaviour if it is happening would be not only unkind, but unlikely to result in the women getting an enjoyable relationship for themselves.

You perhaps need to get further away from the family influences to find out what happens in the wider world, I know that was on the whole a pleasant experience for me as a young person, as I found my family on whom I previously based ideas of behaviour were odd and limited and untypical.

 

[jaythos]

Maybe she found someone she liked more than you, I wouldn't take any of the excuses a woman gives when shes decided that she can do better than you all that serious. The "i am overwhelmed" thing was definitely an excuse, it doesn't sound as bad as "i suddenly decided i don't want you anymore, now leave me alone". things like "i need space", "i need to work on myself" is a kind of meaningless verbiage that woman learn from each other to get out of things they don't like without using direct language (being genuine and honest). I know from first hand experience and woman in my family that they can be absolutely heartless and vicious.

There is a group of woman who get super intense and almost love bombing in the initial stage and then just suddenly decide to nope out, they are not mentally well, don't be so naive as to believe anything they say, or that they are as great as you think they are.

These 'heartless' and vicious traits are not unique to women.
I think that it's clear that OP came here asking for help and guidance in understanding their autistic ex-partner, saying 'they probably found someone they like more than you' when it's very unlikely to be the case is pretty insensitive

 

[Jordy]

These 'heartless' and vicious traits are not unique to women.
I think that it's clear that OP came here asking for help and guidance in understanding their autistic ex-partner, saying 'they probably found someone they like more than you' when it's very unlikely to be the case is pretty insensitive

I never said they were, and things like that happen on life.

 

[Jordy]

You maybe have to allow for the fact that your family may have some problems and may not be typical, as this behaviour if it is happening would be not only unkind, but unlikely to result in the women getting an enjoyable relationship for themselves.

You perhaps need to get further away from the family influences to find out what happens in the wider world, I know that was on the whole a pleasant experience for me as a young person, as I found my family on whom I previously based ideas of behaviour were odd and limited and untypical.

If i leave my family people will treat me better? This doesn't make any sense.

 

[Thinx]

If i leave my family people will treat me better? This doesn't make any sense.

Well, the reality is, we do tend to think our family dynamics are how everyone is, until we leave for say, training or college or a job, or just to live elsewhere. Then we meet a wide variety of others who often see things differently from our family members, and behave differently. It certainly is an eye-opener.

You described some of your family as behaving in unkind ways. Lots of people don't behave like that. Also, some people behave in ways you prefer to how your family is. That's my experience. I think you may be quite young? So maybe you haven't had the chance to spend time away from home apart from brief trips?