A help program for autistic people in college... which I do not desire

[HappynessMad]

It sounds more like it's "forced participation in small talk" to me. It actually sounds pretty demeaning if you're even remotely capable of socializing. Maybe that's just the way it was presented (to us or to OP) but that's my impression.

THAT right there is where my mind is being read. It is a subtle ableist red flag that I sense.

 

[HappynessMad]

I think you may find college a lot harder than you expect. There are lots of autistic people who did well in H.S. and then crash two or three years into college. I recommend you try out the group and see how it goes. You can always drop out of that support program if you feel it's a waste of time.

I'm kind of curious about that myself. But yeah I wanna drop out and I think I will do it. I'm just anxious to prepare for anyone that will accuse me of being selfish.

 

[Graphin]

Now that I remember some shenanigans I had with certain lazy organizations before:
It is be that you refusing to go to that class coould be used as basis for your school to refuse other disability accomodations.
Which yes would be discrimination, lazy and likely illegal, but that kind of stuff still happens sometimes.

 

[HappynessMad]

Now that I remember some shenanigans I had with certain lazy organizations before:
It is be that you refusing to go to that class coould be used as basis for your school to refuse other disability accomodations.
Which yes would be discrimination, lazy and likely illegal, but that kind of stuff still happens sometimes.

I don't think my school will do that. I even spoke to the people behind accommodations into talking to the people behind the Program. They know of it and are not all like "You gotta be a part of it. Its your disability that makes you who you are."

 

[Shamar]

I am about to enter my freshman year in college.

I was just enrolled into this program which is primarily designed to help autistic people in the college (academic coaches that look over you in classes, a "conversation club" forcing you to remind yourself of social cues and the like, workshops, etc).

Now, let's be real. It's good that this program exists for autistic people. I am an autistic person. Did I sign myself up for this? Yes, but impulsively.

I felt shoehorned and forced to by my family; parents. What happened was that I met up with the college's services for accommodations and they told me and my family (in the meeting... regrettably) about this program. Unknowingly, I was all like "Well okay... let's see how it goes." They referred me and I went to a meeting for this program. Turns out that they have what I described above (coaches that look over you in class, this conversation club that you have to take at least once a week despite my social skills being decent).

(Problem is that I do not have struggles that should really cause me to be in this program. In high school, I barely had any issue just because I was autistic, nevermind I was on accommodations for testing. Only troubles I had was just at least a few bullies in my classes that tried to scare me and I just fought back. Luckily I made out of high school. No teacher or educator thought I was a burden. I made friends both in- and out- of high school. I have social skills. I feel confident talking to people, at least 65% of the time. I even did volunteer service. However... although my family is generally supportive of me, we all struggle still. They struggle with my growing up and how to understand me. I guess they don't care how I feel, even if I TRIED to tell them.)

Look, I am not saying they are bad. But yeah, my family made me sign and agree to just everything. I didn't know what I was signing up for. I thought I was forced to or else. I can't believe my decision. I acknowledge the other side is going to say "Well they are your family/parents, you should have the power to talk to them. Or you gotta listen. They just wanna help." (this is all paid for by the way, at least the first year).

Yeah totally. However I am over 18 at the time of this post. I am pretty dependent, I still live at my parent's house and I don't drive yet.

I feel weak just for being this age and not being able to bring my case up.

How does this all make you feel?

Tell me what can you really say about this. Anything not making sense? Let me know.

These sorts of programs all seem to be one dimensional, and based on an attitude of "All autistics have (this) problem and and need help doing (this)." Whatever (this) is; it seem to be dependent on what the current fad is. They don't recognize we are all different, and need different kinds of support. I've said this before, but it bears repeating: telling an autistic person to simply "Go out, have conversations, and make friends" and expecting it to work, is like teaching a paraplegic to walk by telling him "Just stand up and put one foot in front of the other." Both show an abysmal ignorance of what the actual problem is.

 

[HappynessMad]

These sorts of programs all seem to be one dimensional, and based on an attitude of "All autistics have (this) problem and and need help doing (this)." Whatever (this) is; it seem to be dependent on what the current fad is. They don't recognize we are all different, and need different kinds of support. I've said this before, but it bears repeating: telling an autistic person to simply "Go out, have conversations, and make friends" and expecting it to work, is like teaching a paraplegic to walk by telling him "Just stand up and put one foot in front of the other." Both show an abysmal ignorance of what the actual problem is.

I wish that I had communicated this problem to my family but they don't always know the real problem, even if their intention is of the best.

 

[SDRSpark]

I wish that I had communicated this problem to my family but they don't always know the real problem, even if their intention is of the best.

If you're anything like me, you have a hard time really unpacking and articulating your true feelings in the moment. (I have a hard time with face to face conversation because of this. I feel pressure to make a decision about how I feel about something immediately and I usually wind up saying something I later regret because I realize it's not a full and accurate representation of how I feel.)

If you're indeed like this, don't be tempted to beat yourself up about it.

 

[BlueSky Aozora]

As for training, though, I have to take a whole bunch of training that really isn't relevant to my job. We all do, it's kind of a running joke in the workplace.

Yeah.. now I'm worried about how can I juggle my other important tasks in the remaining time. All tasks need concentration & I kinda cant concentrate, thinking about this. There's another person who volunteered to take my place, not sure if he's still want it or not. but it's kinda a waste if I don't go since it's very expensive if paid by myself & it's certified.

How did you manage juggling other tasks when taking the whole bunch of training? Did you not worry?

 

[BlueSky Aozora]

I wonder how people in my surrounding always accept everything troublesome (in my opinion) as opportunities for them. They accept many tasks or training they get with sparkling motivation.. How can they be so.. energetic and not overwhelmed?

 

[SDRSpark]

Yeah.. now I'm worried about how can I juggle my other important tasks in the remaining time. All tasks need concentration & I kinda cant concentrate, thinking about this. There's another person who volunteered to take my place, not sure if he's still want it or not. but it's kinda a waste if I don't go since it's very expensive if paid by myself & it's certified.

How did you manage juggling other tasks when taking the whole bunch of training? Did you not worry?

I guess I'm fortunate in that my workplace isn't entirely idiotic, so they give us time to actually do the training. (It certainly doesn't hurt that we're production, and so stuff needs to get done, but it's not with the same urgency as doing other business activities that have serious time crunches on them. They know we won't get as many parts made on a day when we have training.)

There are a lot of things about my job that are pretty silly or outright stupid, but balancing work and training is something they seem to handle pretty well.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

This is all paid for, mind you.

When you say it's all paid for do you mean that it is funded by the college or that you or your parents have paid for it?

 

[tducey]

I can see value in these programs but you do what's best for you and what makes you feel comfortable.

 

[HappynessMad]

When you say it's all paid for do you mean that it is funded by the college or that you or your parents have paid for it?

Its more of the latter, through the Department of Rehabilitation.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

Its more of the latter, through the Department of Rehabilitation.

... I have no idea what that means.
<<< Is English.

 

[HappynessMad]

... I have no idea what that means.
<<< Is English.

I live in California in the United States. There's this organization titled the DOR which is a government program for people with "disabilities." I was made a client of this program through parents. Mostly helps with funding and the like.

 

[NothingToSeeHere]

I live in California in the United States. There's this organization titled the DOR which is a government program for people with "disabilities." I was made a client of this program through parents. Mostly helps with funding and the like.

Ok so the government pays for it. I was going to say that if your parents pay and you aren't going to go you should officially drop out and ask for a refund. I think if you really aren't planning to go you should official drop out regardless, as the place may go to someone who appreciates it or the money spent better elsewhere.

 

[SDRSpark]

Ok so the government pays for it. I was going to say that if your parents pay and you aren't going to go you should officially drop out and ask for a refund. I think if you really aren't planning to go you should official drop out regardless, as the place may go to someone who appreciates it or the money spent better elsewhere.

Not only that, but I would be concerned that there could be legal implications (for you or the school) if they take that money and you don't participate. (I don't think the feds will come knocking at your door or anything like that, but the school could be seen as using funds inappropriately and may not get access to said funds in the future.)

 

[HappynessMad]

Not only that, but I would be concerned that there could be legal implications (for you or the school) if they take that money and you don't participate. (I don't think the feds will come knocking at your door or anything like that, but the school could be seen as using funds inappropriately and may not get access to said funds in the future.)

The funds are just for academic coaching. Coaching is non-negotiable but it is possible for it to be diminish over time, just not abruptly.

 

[HappynessMad]

Not only that, but I would be concerned that there could be legal implications (for you or the school) if they take that money and you don't participate. (I don't think the feds will come knocking at your door or anything like that, but the school could be seen as using funds inappropriately and may not get access to said funds in the future.)

Besides, this "Conversation Club" is something I can just get out of. I'm bailing out as soon as maybe after the first meeting. Its something I can terminate the agreement with.

 

[SDRSpark]

The funds are just for academic coaching. Coaching is non-negotiable but it is possible for it to be diminish over time, just not abruptly.

How can they force you to undergo academic coaching? If that's not something that everyone gets, this would really tick me off, honestly. If you didn't ask for/want it, having them put me into a special category for special treatment isn't something that I would be OK with, personally.

I'm glad you can get out of the creepy sounding 'conversation club' though.