Aspergers and Violence (an alternative thread).

[wyverary]

I am not the least bit of a violent person. I'm more likely to try and run away from the situation and cry rather than act out on any feeling of anger (even if the anger is justified and expression of it is necessary).

When it comes to violence in movies/TV/games, etc. it really depends. If I feel it contributes positively to the overall tone of the film, then I'm okay with it, even if it's somewhat hard to watch. (I'm thinking the Coen brothers' adaptation of No Country for Old Men.)

What I absolutely cannot watch, though, is any depiction of sexual violence. I can't watch rape scenes, even if they serve a useful purpose in the story---I had to close my eyes during that scene in the American adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. And if I encounter rape scenes that don't serve an absolutely essential core part of the story, I am just utterly turned off and have to stop watching...one of the reasons I gave up on Game of Thrones (both the books and the TV series).

 

[LittleTigger]

I am afraid of strangers, I never answer the door to them.
If I am struck though, I black out and get accused of all
kinds of things, hitting someone, biting, scratching, etc.
but I don't know if I can belive it.

I don't like scary or gory films I hide under the chair.

 

[Andy R]

I am not a violent person, but I have had to use violence on more than a few occasions in my life through my past work. Every time I have it has been morally and legally justified (protecting myself or others). Thankfully I have never had to kill anyone.

I would prefer to go through the rest of my life without having to use it again.

 

[Tarragon]

It's a hard thread this. I am not by nature violent. I have been in situations that have started to "push my buttons". I think the capacity is built into all of us from a purely survival point of view. I do not enjoy watching it on screen for "entertainment". I don't really watch a lot of films, but the ones I do are all Pixar and fun stuff.

When I am out with a girlfriend, I always take on the role of "protector" if we happen to be out late at night (for example), as I think this is an expected role. If I talk about anything remotely violent, I get told off, yet I'm pretty sure if someone tried to mug her she wouldn't be upset if I ripped the muggers head off! And, yes, I reckon I'd react that way if pushed properly.

I hate confrontations though, as they always leave me pumped full of adrenaline and testosterone ready for a fight, and luckily there never is a reason to act out my role.

People being nasty to other people is so stupid and wrong. I would never do this, and just don't understand what motivates people to be so horrible to each other.

I am a big fan of Taoism and want to rise above human behaviour (including mine). I have done some martial arts and love the discipline of it. Humans are so fragile when you learn. People acting tough is frankly pathetic, and they are just bullies. Intimidation and survival are two different things.

 

[Nikita__MacLeod]

I indulge in violence. Violent tv shows,films etc..
I've been in a few fights and won all of them.
I don't feel fear and when I get angry I can sometimes lust for violence,for a fight with someone.
I never hit someone unprovoked though,whenever I did it's because they hit me or said something really inappropriate.
Im not a bully though and as a child it would be me fighting other people's bullys..
I'm a grown up married woman now,so obviously I haven't done anything like that in years,but I have beat a guy that felt my ass before, I punched him in the jaw,he fell like a sack,and then kicked onntge ground until he cried. He deserved it, my boyfriend(now husband) and friends were there ,they were a bit shocked. I also had to pick my friends 16 year old brother up by the scruff and threthen him.
I am a good person,very kind to the people I love,no one else though.
I have an empathy quotient of 6/50, this is why I have no fear and won't hesitate to get violent when provoked.
I would never,ever harm a child,animal or elderly person though,not even if provoked.
There's a difference between not letting people step all over you and being a scumbag.
I'm asperger with ADD,21 and female btw

 

[JohnNaylor]

One of my problems in life is that the word for someone who is peaceful and will not defend themselves physically in society is 'victim'.
I am not like this due to any moral stance or any incident in my past. I just cannot stand even the thought of violence.
This may be a contradiction to that but I have no problem with violent films or TV shows as I feel a complete detachment from things I see on TV. I do have a problem with violence in books as when I read it seems more real than than when I just watch it
Thanks to everyone who has replied so far

 

[Maddox]

I would not hesitate to use violence in the context of self--defense; that's a natural impulse. Making oneself a victim could, at least in an extreme form, even escalate a conflict. There are situations where you simply can't remove yourself from a situation but have to face a possible attack and in such a case my own integrity has the highest priority. **** peace and morals.

 

[Dynamic]

Asperger's manifests itself differently in everyone and is probably infinitely variable. It does upset me to hear people in the media casually throwing around the terms Aspergers or Autism, and saying things to suggest that someone that committed a violent and heinous act likely did so simply because they had an ASD condition. I think nothing could be further from the truth. Everyone, despite what condition or disorder they have, is still unique, subject to their upbringing, the life they've lived, and all of the influences they've experienced.

That being said, the way my Asperger's manifests itself might be exactly the opposite as the OP, however I think in many ways there are some aspects of mine that might give me an idea of what you deal with. Personally, I'm not really affected by violence. I tend to watch and enjoy fairly violent movies, tv shows, etc. Not to an unhealthy degree, action movies/tv just entertain me. I'm also a firearms instructor and very tuned into the defensive mindset.

One thing I will say is, I think I might know a little bit about how you feel, John. Please correct me if I'm wrong. For me, it's not violence that affects me. Social situations, and particularly awkward social situations make me extremely uncomfortable. An example is, my wife and I were watching an old episode of The Office the other day. As usual with that show, there was a significantly awkward, inappropriate, just plain weird situation with a couple of characters. I can't even remember what it was. Physically, it made me feel very uncomfortable, so much so that I found it hard to even look at the TV, felt as if I was having to retreat within myself in some manner, and I ended up having to get up and walk out of the room. I couldn't control it, even though consciously I knew it was just a part of a TV show to laugh at, my body wouldn't let me just shrug that off and still felt all of that discomfort regardless.

I think I understand a bit John. Having been a firearms instructor and having trained a few hundred students, I've been fortunate to have trained and helped a fairly wide range of people. With the general subject of violence, self defense, etc. for a lot of people it is just a very difficult subject to approach. I've had students that physically and psychologically could not deal with it. It was just too overwhelming for them to think about. Whether it's genetic or due to a particular condition, or whether it's a long term psychological cause, you are who you are and ultimately all you have to do is make the most with what you have. There are always ways to modify things and approach them in a different manner to set yourself up for the best possible outcome given the circumstances.

 

[ShatteredUniverse]

This is a difficult subject for me.

See, I'm bipolar as well as an Aspie, and when my mood swings just the right way I can be rather violent (almost exclusively towards inanimate objects.)

When I'm leveled off I'm not a violent person at all.

 

[Divrom]

I would say that my pacifism is even more important to me than my socialism.

I'm not sure it has anything to do with Aspergers, but it definitely feels at the core of who I am.

 

[Ste11aeres]

One of the comments on a blog i was reading said that Aspies are like pitbulls because some seem nice but in the end they bite you in the crotch.

I already like pitbulls. Like all dogs, they genuinely are nice, but can develop problems if they have bad owners. And they face horrible prejudice. Are more likely to be abused than any other dog. Maybe we are like pitbulls. But neither us nor such dogs are what the comment implied.

 

[Jerome]

I have an intimate, complicated relationship with violence. I am not one who believes that violence doesn't solve anything. Strategic violence can solve the problem of random violence. For instance, when one of the neighborhood bullies was inflicting violence upon my person, my brother came to the rescue and reciprocated said violence upon him. That solved my bully problem. My family life was extremely violent, so I am somewhat comfortable in its presence. I learned to navigate violence as a course of survival.

On the other hand, I experienced episodes of rage that were volcanic. One time the family had to call the police on me. It was justified. I could have killed someone that day. I was five feet tall and weighed 60 pounds, but it took five police officers to subdue me and carry me out of the house in five point restraint. When my father picked me up he told me I needed to do something about myh anger. That year Star Trek premiered on TV and Spock's description of the Vulcan race and their destruction at the hands of violence sounded much like my dillemma. I adopted the Vulcan code of logic and reason above emotion and passion. I had moderate success with this approach.

I grew up during the racially tumultios 60's. I witnessed race riots at my high school, and empathized with the White students who received the brunt of the Black violence. However, I was not able to express these feelings because I was Black and the proper response was to empathize with my people. I had a White friend, a rarity in those days, and when some Black guys jumped him I stood and watched. When our teacher came to the rescue he asked me why I didn't help my friend. I had no answer. It was the end of a friendship.

Today, violence is no longer a tool at my disposal. I worked out my issues with it in AA. I am not upset by violence and am able to keep my cool in the midst of it. In fact, some of my military friends tell me I would have been a great soldier had I joined the military. I still think violence is a necessary proponent of the human experience, and over the course of history we have made major strides in overcoming it. Peace will reign when man's love of power is overcome by the power of love.

 

[DylanKP]

Personally, I've been known to be quite violent; however, i grew up in the most violent state school in Texas. I once took a third of a guy's testicle for waking me up. Another kid woke me up, and then he woke up a half-hour later. However, with the exception of my immediate reaction of being woke up, I have never been violent unless someone had been violent towards me in the past. However, when I was going through my trial, I had never ever wanted to be part of any violence, and it was widely accepted that people in the autistic spectrum are less likely to be violent than others. The reason we hear about so many Aspie murderers is because media never reports on 'boring mundane' murders where the only thing we can blame is the individual, and not the group.