Just saw this old post, read it and had yet another excited "THATS ME " AC moment.
As a kid I'd cry a lot, I now know these where meltdowns but at the time I could not explain why I was upset.
As an adult I'm pretty sure I went about 4 or 5 years without crying(could be longer).
I tend to see a lot of stuff from a very practical point of view. death for example is something that has to happen in nature. Old or sick people die and I'm thinking " well that's great, their life sucked and was essentially pointless at this stage, the pain is over I'm happy for them" but I know you cant say that stuff out loud or I'll be called something horrible. My wife is horrified when I talk like that.
I really don't get it, would these people prefer them to go on suffering, in pain, unable to walk, unable to use a toilet? I get it if it's a younger person or they had something to offer etc but I'm talking bed bound old suffering people.
Luckily in Ireland funerals tend to be more of celebration's than mourning so I've flew under the radar more than once.
I have in the last few years had episodes where I've made myself cry(I just felt I needed to when stuff just got too much to handle and I wanted some form of relief) Always however I was In control and simply stopped once I felt Id done it enough but I do think it helped a little.