Aspie/autistic girlfriend?

[Andrew Campbell]

I was wondering what it's like to have an autistic/aspie girlfriend. I know the people on here are super nice.

Also, does anyone have experience with such a girl/boy friend they'd care to share? I've never even had a normal GF, so I dunno where to even start haha.


Don't really know why I posted this, other than to just...Well, I dunno.

 

[bookworm44]

I was wondering what it's like to have an autistic/aspie girlfriend. I know the people on here are super nice.

Also, does anyone have experience with such a girl/boy friend they'd care to share? I've never even had a normal GF, so I dunno where to even start haha.


Don't really know why I posted this, other than to just...Well, I dunno.

I can't really answer your question because I am the Aspie and a girl, so I don't know what it's like to date me. But I can say that any relationship takes a lot of focus and energy to succeed, no matter whom it is with.

I actually just read a great novel about a guy who was determined to find his first girlfriend. It was quite good and entertaining; it is called Stim and the author is Kevin Berry. Of course, it is fiction, not advice, but you might enjoy the story.

 

[Andrew Campbell]

Ah, I see. Yeah. I have yet to find a young (18-23) autistic/aspie lady whom I could date, as I'm only 19. I've looked, but to no avail haha.

 

[Ereth]

I'm the same as Bookworm, and she's right. Every relationship requires time and effort to thrive.

I guess I could always ask my boyfriend what it's like to date me and report back . . .

 

[Andrew Campbell]

Maybe haha. Of course, I wouldn't ask anything uncomfortable of you

 

[King_Oni]

I guess I qualify for this thread considering I'm dating an aspie girl for the past 2 years.

What it's like? Just like any other relationship (but then again, plenty of people who haven't even dated non aspies). The main thing that might set it off for me personally;

I have my interests, she has her interests, and we meet up every once in a while. It's long distance (still same country and 100 miles is still a reasonable distance to travel IMO). Because of that we can spend time on things we like ourselves rather than be stuck with each other a lot and not be able to obsess and get into our personal interests. I have my agenda, she has hers, though because she's on the spectrum as well, she understands the need for alone time pretty well. She's not really a clingy type, which is something that has been different for any non-aspie relationships I was in. We do talk quite a lot through chat/text, so we don't have a communication silence as such.

The downside of it all, and perhaps this is just me. I have enough issues of my own to deal with on a daily basis. Having her worries piled on top is though sometimes. Sometimes I wonder if it's holding me back in pursuing goals I suppose. Trying to sort out your own life isn't really the best environment for others to barge in and bury you with their own problems. But I suppose that's part of any relationship... it's just that the foundation seems more rocky at times and it takes more effort to keep it stable.

 

[grapesicles]

My NT boyfriend does notice my obsessions a lot and that I can get really annoyed/anxious over things that might not be such a big deal to others. Although, he's from a psychology background and is also very sweet, kind and patient, so that helps him a lot to understand me rather than being confused or frustrated like other guys might do.

 

[Andrew Campbell]

Thanks for the input! I guess I have like no experience. I mean, people say I'm nice, but I dunno if they mean it.