A weird kind of positive. Think of the average kind of young NT girl. Of course this is no blanket statement, would not apply to everyone, when you've met one NT you've met one NT. They tend to have a lot to worry about. So first they tend to have a large circle of friends, so have to worry about what to say to them and what not to say, and if the friends get upset they have to be there for them and make them happier. Takes a lot. But at the same time they have to worry about how they're seen. So what they wear, how their makeup is, also what they say and don't say. But at the same time they are emotional and have strong feelings and stuff. And also they like talking to people and enjoy company, and without it get lonely and sad. A lot to balance there, no wonder they cry so much, must be very exhausting to be an NT that wants to be socially accepted.
And then you have me. I don't have to worry about huge circles of friends, I don't have to worry about how I look because no matter what people think I'm either shy or retarded, both being about 12, so whatever. I don't feel the need to talk to people, so apart from on here and to my parents and occasionally other family members when I see them I don't talk to anyone, I don't feel lonely, I just lack the need to which saves me a lot of trouble (not only would I have to worry about the things NTs do I'd also have my communication problems), and lastly I don't feel strongly about very much so I am very passive and fine with most things.
Being withdrawn does have its positives. I'm very glad I am. I imagine it is horrible needing to bond with people but lacking the communication skills to achieve it. Being an extroverted autistic must be hell. I feel trapped when I want to say something but can't, and I imagine it must be like that 24/7 for those with my communication impairments along with a social drive. I do feel I have really lucked out having no social drive. Having none is a positive to me in a weird sort of way.
