Autism is a gift

[Forest Cat]

Each of my memories are as crisp and clear as the first time I saw them.

Do you have any problems with remembering things you really don't want to remember clearly? I have some problems with that now and then.

 

[Nitro]

Do you have any problems with remembering things you really don't want to remember clearly? I have some problems with that now and then.

Yes, as much as it is a gift it is also a curse.

 

[Forest Cat]

Yes, as much as it is a gift it is also a curse.

That's exactly what I have said for a long time. When people say "I wish I had a stronger memory", I tell them be careful what you wish for. Because you also have to remember the bad things.

 

[Nitro]

That's exactly what I have said for a long time. When people say "I wish I had a better memory", I tell them be careful what you wish for. Because you also have to remember the bad things.

Do you also get the microbursts of images while in deep thought?

 

[Forest Cat]

Do you also get the microbursts of images while in deep thought?

I get something, I don't know what to call it. It's not pleasant.

 

[Nitro]

I get something, I don't know what to call it. It's not pleasant.

I call mine a flurry.
Countless numbers of images in a flash.

I think what astounds me more than my ability is more of what I describe as the file retrieval system.
How does my brain know where to find them and how does it determine which ones need a closer review?

 

[Ken]

Hi I am just wondering if any of you see your Autism as a gift to human evolution, firstly I wanted to state I am NIFJ personality with Autism, I love alone time in fact I find busy social situations very draining and learned to protect my own energy, I gave up watching the news and the illusions in the world, and focused on myself through a spiritual awakening. I surprisingly loved the meditating and it’s a big part of my life now, my visions are so vivid and beautiful I have never felt so grounded and connected with myself.

I wanted to ask if any of you have hyperphantasia this is the ability to see images crisp and clear with the mind, even with your eyes open, if I say can you picture what you had for breakfast, can you see it exactly how it was? If I say think about chocolate, can you smell it now? Think of a pizza can you visualise it, taste it and smell it? Can you see things other don’t like a tiny pull in fabric, a small stain etc. the opposite to this is aphantasia, only around 10% of the population have this gift and linked to Autism. This is being discussed in the Awake project.

I also wanted to ask if anyone has a good inner monologue voice, i call this our intuition not all people have it, but it helps guide us and process. I use to just think I was different, learning I had Autism when young was hard, and I was told to believe I am just wired different, I felt broken, but I can honestly say what I have learned now, I am grateful for this gift, I don’t have to blend in anymore, the way I look at it is that typical people don’t understand our abilities because they don’t have the hyper senses we do, and learning to use these gifts can very much be rewarding into adulthood, so long as we surpress the ego mind.

I hate the fact I was forced into situations when I was young, like I had to get use to what everyone else was doing, I hated birthday parties, and school was draining, I thrived with alone time, I struggled with negativity from peoples problems and news in the world affected me, how can one understand the world with so much drama, I was like an empath absorbing the bad energy, to a point I would have a melt down. Now I make my own choices and decide what I invest my time into, I choose the people I mix with, I am able to say no! Having my own child now with Autism I fully understand what she is going through, I don’t pressure her into anything, and let her explore her qualities, and help guide her, if she doesn’t want to do something I say ok. I only wish my parents had been more understanding, I’m sure they thought they were helping, my mum always said “it’s what the professions told us to do” when in fact it was more damaging. This is just my opinion, people have to accept that there are some who just like the simple things in life and are just quiet, and like alone time, instead of assuming it’s not normal! We can thrive at our best being allowed to be ourselves and respected.

If a child likes to line up toys instead of playing with them, that’s ok why not join in and make patterns with them, there are so many other ways to learn incorporating them into making shapes, numbers etc I use to go in my own world doing this and if anyone cared to ask what I was doing, I would tell have told them I was learning about symmetry, though I didn’t know what symmetry was then, but I was figuring it out. Now I am an artist making beautiful mandalas, I found myself through my own awakening and my inner child has come back to the surface, I have never been more happier, and can deal with any situation grounding myself and just be in the present focusing on the now, past is not important.

Yes, I see Autism as a gift to human evolution, however that is a very complicated subject. Many will argue that Autism is mostly detrimental. I do believe that it is a gift to evolution. Perhaps not by any "design intent", but just by the physics of biology. By evidence I see it as a benefit. Many, or most, of the benefits are also detriments - at the same time - especially when interface with the general population is required. Since focusing on the negative is largely human nature, the detriments are considered to outweigh the benefits.

For me, my Autism made my career. The career I dreamed of in my very early childhood. However, that dream was denied by my Autism, because my extreme social anxiety made school catastrophically traumatic. I could not handle college or university, so a degree was not possible. Without Autism, that would be the end of it. However, it was my Autism that made my dream come true in spite of no degree - in a very unconventional way.

It should also be noted that many of mankind's greatest minds, for which all of mankind benefit from, were/are Autistic:
Bill Gates, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Henry Ford, Benjamin Franklin, Nikola Tesla, Elon Musk, and many, many more.

Solitude is vital for me, and that was the key to my career success. I finally found a boss that understood that and ensured I worked in a private space.

I also have hyperphantasia and for most of my life, I assumed everyone did, which confused me greatly when others seemed unable to visualize an idea.

Yes, I also have an inner monologue as you describe.

My childhood was a horror story. I too am unable to be forced into any social setting without extreme anxiety, or be forced to be like everyone else. That part of my life was a nightmare.

I always thought that lining up my toys was playing with them. I also treasured my toys and wanted to protect them. Other children terrorized me. That ended up being a major phobia: (pedophobia).

It is wonderful that you have arrived where you are, satisfied in who you are. Can't get any better than that! Thank you for your input.

 

[MildredHubble]

I'm obviously weird. I can remember things vividly, but if we're talking "imagining" things, at least the way I understand it, I can't come up with anything novel. I can't imagine "A Beach" but I can certainly remember every one I've been on.

This has been an issue for me as, in their infinite wisdom, people involved in my mental health treatment have pushed me very hard to complete mindfulness tasks. Like listen to exercises online etc. This turned out to be very silly as the following happened.

I listened to the exercise and it started by saying "Picture yourself on a beach..." so I did. But this was a memory of being on the beach when I was 3 years old. It was the middle of winter, and I was distressed by the noise of the sea. So I tried again, until I remembered being on a beach with my mother and her mother, it was sunny, so I tried to stay in that. But problem, now I'm thinking about being on a beach with two of the most abusive people I've known. Then my mind starts to recall in great vivid detail, all of the horrible things they did. I didn't choose to, its involuntary.

So after half an hour of that, I stopped. I skipped the track back to the beginning again and told myself to just imagine a random beach this time. But all I got was black with dim flashes of perhaps a palm tree or some sand, but nothing coherent. I tried very hard but I started to realise something I hadn't noticed before. I can remember, but I can't imagine! It was both fascinating and distressing.

But this is useful to me as I can picture every component of my car engine bay, or the braking system or where the 2N2222 transistors I bought 5 years ago are or where the AY38912 IC is on every Amstrad and Spectrum variant I own. I can move stuff about and rotate it in my mind. After a while though, this becomes less visual and more like I just kinda perceive where things are. I'm not sure quite how to articulate that one lol!

But I can't imagine a pink bunny rabbit hopping around my garden regardless of how much I'd like to. All that happens is flashes of perhaps something pink and a concept of fluffiness but that's it.

So I'd say I have a vivid memory, but a terrible, at least in terms of vision, imagination.

 

[Aspychata]

That lining up and sorting of Halloween candy was my daughter's happiest achievement for the night. So she laid her head down and l took a picture of her big smile. She sorted the candy into units so she could count how many pieces she had. At 16, we spent four hours making a teapot out of fondant and cake and rice crispies. It was fun for both of us. She now enjoys her job in research. She refuses to discuss autism or the probability that she may have this. I home schooled because she didn't have to listen to school bells, which irritated the bejesus out of me. Is this a gift? I need to isolate myself for lots of reasons, that doesn't seem to be a gift.

 

[MildredHubble]

When I was about three, I liked to take all of the pots and pans out of the cupboards and arrange them in a line in the living room. I'd arrange them in matching pairs and sizes with the handles turned inwards in line with eachother. All in a long line. I was very proud of that. The first time I did it, my mother said "Oh did you make a train?", I had no idea what she was talking about, I just thought the pattern was cool. She became increasingly less enthusiastic about me doing this every morning after that.

 

[Misty Avich]

I'm PDD-NOS so I don't know if that makes a difference but my ASD has never been useful for me. It's never provided me with good skills or talents or hyperfocus, and I know I'll never get a well-paying career.

I was put on the special ed table all through school and didn't get good grades at the end. I seemed to be too conscious of my social life.

OK I can spell and write well, but so can a lot of NT adults. And I can play the keyboard with one hand but some NTs can play the keyboard with two hands, and/or can play other musical instruments. I can draw good cartoon-style pictures, although I have to copy from something, but I've met NTs who are brilliant drawers (as in artists, not storage boxes you pull out your dresser).

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

My autism made my career, if that's not a gift what would be.

 

[Ken]

OK I can spell and write well, but so can a lot of NT adults. And I can play the keyboard with one hand but some NTs can play the keyboard with two hands, and/or can play other musical instruments. I can draw good cartoon-style pictures, although I have to copy from something, but I've met NTs who are brilliant drawers (as in artists, not storage boxes you pull out your dresser).

I don't think of this as a competition. I am proud of and attribute my career success to my Autism. There are also may NT's that have a successful career in the same field. I don't think I am "better" than them. What I am really proud of is that I have achieved this when it seemed so impossible in my early life, not because I think NT's couldn't do it. It is in that sense that I feel it is a gift. If there is any sense of competition, it is with myself.

Being proud of having the skills you have should not be dependent on others not having or being less skilled. You have the skills you have and can be proud of them even if others are better. Every individual, whether NT or ND, is unique. Being Autistic just pushed the "unique" a bit further. I am unique enough to be called a weirdo. The gift, as I understand it, is when that weird uniqueness happens to be something beneficial. And, that benefit can either be to you alone or to someone else. My uniqueness was seen as innovative by my last boss. That was after much of my life as an outcast weirdo. It's just a needle in a haystack. I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Also, it wasn't until after I retired that I connected the dots of my life to decide that my Autism was a gift. Prior to that, I considered it hell.

 

[Ken]

I home schooled because she didn't have to listen to school bells, which irritated the bejesus out of me. Is this a gift? I need to isolate myself for lots of reasons, that doesn't seem to be a gift.

No, that is not a gift, but there is a lot more to autism than that.

She now enjoys her job in research.

Now that is a gift. Doesn't matter how good she is at it. If she enjoys it, it's a gift.

 

[Misty Avich]

I don't think of this as a competition. I am proud of and attribute my career success to my Autism. There are also may NT's that have a successful career in the same field. I don't think I am "better" than them. What I am really proud of is that I have achieved this when it seemed so impossible in my early life, not because I think NT's couldn't do it. It is in that sense that I feel it is a gift. If there is any sense of competition, it is with myself.

Being proud of having the skills you have should not be dependent on others not having or being less skilled. You have the skills you have and can be proud of them even if others are better. Every individual, whether NT or ND, is unique. Being Autistic just pushed the "unique" a bit further. I am unique enough to be called a weirdo. The gift, as I understand it, is when that weird uniqueness happens to be something beneficial. And, that benefit can either be to you alone or to someone else. My uniqueness was seen as innovative by my last boss. That was after much of my life as an outcast weirdo. It's just a needle in a haystack. I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Also, it wasn't until after I retired that I connected the dots of my life to decide that my Autism was a gift. Prior to that, I considered it hell.

Autism is a gift to some. It sounds like you have succeeded in that way, which is great. I'm happy for you. Your autism is a gift to you.

But not to me. It's just...a nuisance lol.

 

[Tom]

I often find discussions of this nature, while interesting, often contain much that is actually spectulatory and neglects to include all persons with this condition. It seems to me they focus only on ASD-1 and even then only the most sucessful examples of ASD-1. If one wishes to describe anything as collectively autistic it should also include ASD-2 and 3 and the 37.9 % of newly diagnosed autism cases also being diagnosed as having interlectual disability.

That is not to say 'success stories' aren't useful and encouraging. I like them very much. But they are far from a roadmap all autistics can follow.

Now my own latest theory.

Both Leo Kanner and Hans Asperger, two of the most famous pioneers in identifying autism were from Austria. So, it follows, that part of any autism diagnosing clinician's course work should include exposure to Yodeling and Alphorn music.

 

[Rodafina]

Every time I look at this thread, I can’t get past my notion that if there is a gift, then there must be a giver of the gift. For those of you who do think autism is a gift, from whom did you receive it?

 

[Forest Cat]

Now my own latest theory.

Both Leo Kanner and Hans Asperger, two of the most famous pioneers in identifying autism were from Austria. So, it follows, that part of any autism diagnosing clinician's course work should include exposure to Yodeling and Alphorn music.

I concur. Lots of yodeling and alphorn, makes perfect sense.

 

[Mr. Stevens]

Brilliant post, Alice

 

[MNAus]

I view this as a slightly provocative question, so I'm going to be straightforward with the answer. None of this is personal or intended to invalidate anyone.

Is autism a gift? No. No more than life is generally anyway. For many it is a very definite disability.

Is it the next stage of evolution (from an onwards and upwards idea)? Definitely not. I find this sort of idea quite troubling. Nothing good comes from ideas that a particular group of humans are more genetically advanced.

I would also suggest people take care with confirmation bias. It's quite easy to fall prey to this, especially when the traits are appealing.