Autistic women diagnosed late in life: Appearing 'normal' on an 'uneven playing field'

[WereBear]

Give me a nice soft stretchy tee, comfortable shorts and memory foam flip-flops. Guess I'd better be glad I live in Florida.

I've always been more comfortable in layers of soft fabric; and now I live in the Frozen North

 

[Ocarina]

Diagnosed at 48 I was told that whilst I fit the criteria for an HFA diagnosis, my life is not (apparently) impaired enough to warrant an official diagnosis.

I can remember as a teenager deciding to learn how this social lark worked - how to get people to like me, what people wanted to hear etc and I spent the majority of the rest of my life becoming very skilled at being someone who fitted in and made others feel good about themselves.

In the midst of this, the quirky kid who I still am was lost and I reached the point of almost mutism as a result of the extreme pressure that built up over the years. Diagnosis has been immensely liberating and I feel at last that I've found my clan.

 

[Bella Pines]

Will check out the Autism Women’s Network, thanks. I spent decades hiding among scientists, then when I went out into the 'normal' world, I was labelled and different, but accepted almost as comic relief. But now everything just makes sense, I almost wish I'd found out sooner.

 

[BirdHeart]

Hi AGXStarseed, I read your blog after writing an article myself and was searching where to send it. The main core of it was these social skills and the social code. After decades of making huge effort for my friends and relationships, (faking it I suppose) have discovered that almost all the normal neurotypes I have known are not true to what they say, and even with their great social skills will not speak out for me, not even one sentence- it's too much to ask for some reason. So finally after 50 years of trying to be normal because it is supposed to be better, I discover that I am not wrong about everything and they are not right about everything. We are all human and have faults- just some people cant accept that- these are the ones that cause us stress and bully us to Kingdom come.

Curiously my partner says that I am a 'starseed'.

 

[Aeolienne]

Attwood makes me cringe

The one time I heard Tony Attwood speak I heckled him.