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Awkward emotional responses.

Outdated

Outdated

High Function ASD2
V.I.P Member
I’m fairly hardened to a lot of what I see in the world, and I really have seen a lot that I hope the rest of you don’t. So when I watch movies or see stories on the news they don’t upset me. I’ve sat the death watch with a couple of old friends and they thanked me for my company because I wasn’t getting all emotionally over excited about the situation. They found my presence calming.

But then something seemingly small and insignificant can leave me bawling my eyes out. This morning’s example is from the movie I posted a link about for Luca. It’s a good movie, one I love, but when I read the credits about the real Red Dog and how a town erected a statue for him when he died I lost it.

I’ve been like this most of my life but I don’t understand why. Does anyone else have similar experiences?
 
I have not always been, but since I hit my 60s the calmest and least emotional scene in some films can produce tears. What amounts to something similar to what you described. The simple expression of group warmth to an individual, for any reason, can start tears flowing. I look at them as happy tears even though I am not sure what happy is. Perhaps it is nothing more than an overwhelming sense of empathy.
 
My tears seem to come in fits and starts. I spent nearly 20 years not crying at all but in the past five years or so that has changed dramatically.

Interesting article here that really goes into detail on crying…

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6201288/
Here’s a brief snippet from it:
In sum, while our knowledge of the peripheral psychophysiology of tearful crying is still modest, some consistent patterns have emerged. Researchers have consistently found increases in sympathetic activity associated with crying. Findings for parasympathetic activation are somewhat more mixed, but there is some suggestion that the resolution of crying is associated with increases in parasympathetic activity, perhaps suggesting a recovery process associated with crying. The overall pattern suggests that the production of tears is both an arousing distress signal and a means to restore physiological balance (and perhaps also psychological), depending on how and when this complex behavior is displayed. Further research will be needed to investigate more precisely the time course of crying and the role of specific physiological mechanisms in crying onset and subsequent changes and its relationship with emotion (regulation) and stress processes. A methodological issue that needs future attention is the precise determination of the onset and offset of tearful crying. Both obervational and self-report methods have been used, but we do not yet know the validity and reliability of these different methods.
 
Outdated said:
I’m fairly hardened to a lot of what I see in the world, and I really have seen a lot that I hope the rest of you don’t. So when I watch movies or see stories on the news they don’t upset me. I’ve sat the death watch with a couple of old friends and they thanked me for my company because I wasn’t getting all emotionally over excited about the situation. They found my presence calming.

But then something seemingly small and insignificant can leave me bawling my eyes out. This morning’s example is from the movie I posted a link about for Luca. It’s a good movie, one I love, but when I read the credits about the real Red Dog and how a town erected a statue for him when he died I lost it.

I’ve been like this most of my life but I don’t understand why. Does anyone else have similar experiences?
Click to expand...
Rodafina said:
My tears seem to come in fits and starts. I spent nearly 20 years not crying at all but in the past five years or so that has changed dramatically.

Interesting article here that really goes into detail on crying…

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6201288/
Here’s a brief snippet from it:
In sum, while our knowledge of the peripheral psychophysiology of tearful crying is still modest, some consistent patterns have emerged. Researchers have consistently found increases in sympathetic activity associated with crying. Findings for parasympathetic activation are somewhat more mixed, but there is some suggestion that the resolution of crying is associated with increases in parasympathetic activity, perhaps suggesting a recovery process associated with crying. The overall pattern suggests that the production of tears is both an arousing distress signal and a means to restore physiological balance (and perhaps also psychological), depending on how and when this complex behavior is displayed. Further research will be needed to investigate more precisely the time course of crying and the role of specific physiological mechanisms in crying onset and subsequent changes and its relationship with emotion (regulation) and stress processes. A methodological issue that needs future attention is the precise determination of the onset and offset of tearful crying. Both obervational and self-report methods have been used, but we do not yet know the validity and reliability of these different methods.
Click to expand...
Le lacrime trovano sempre il modo di uscire, anche quando la vita ti fa credere di averle finite
 
I tend to think that all of our triggers are going to be really personalized based on experience.

If ASD is a difference in cognition, I could see them being further 'out there' than the NT range for some people. I have certain words (even the word 'stimming') which give me the creeps or send shivers down my spine for apparently no reason. I'm not sure where responses like that come from, but some of them make me feel like I'm almost trapped inside of my body.

I don't know. Having ASD is just weird sometimes
 
I've been thinking about this over the last couple of days. Mainly in response to a comment from someone about me generally not showing emotion (they were less polite), but then I was thinking that there are some films, some music, or just days when I'm cycling along and I'll be in floods of tears. Yet day to day, I'm a zombie to good/funny/sad emotions/situations.

What I've worked out is that when I'm emotional it's coming out from inside my mind/soul, as opposed to being triggered in response to primary senses - what I see/hear. Even in the case of the film, it's after I've processed and considered it, and generally in situations that I personally relate to . So Dead Poets Society, the closing credits to "the Deuce", the end of "Our Friends in the North", or my favourite ever TV mini series, "Shooting the Past".
 
I am often quite saddened or sympathetic with stories and experiences even though I may not express it in my voice or words, whether oral or written. I never cry and even in writing, I have difficulty expressing emotions. As such, I love the "friendly" reaction we have here since I can use it to easily convey what I cannot find the words for.

I have gotten into trouble at work (social services) because I've had clients complain that I appeared to be unsympathetic to their circumstances.
 
Some things I am probably too desensitized to as well but some things that seem insignificant make me sob.

Like you, I have seen and experienced things that most people never have and I hope they never will.

Anything having to do with dogs makes me extremely emotional though, whether it’s good or bad.
I got a book for Christmas called When You Love a Dog. There is nothing sad in it at all but it resonated with me so much that I was crying my eyes out.
 
Outdated said:
I’m fairly hardened to a lot of what I see in the world, and I really have seen a lot that I hope the rest of you don’t. So when I watch movies or see stories on the news they don’t upset me. I’ve sat the death watch with a couple of old friends and they thanked me for my company because I wasn’t getting all emotionally over excited about the situation. They found my presence calming.

But then something seemingly small and insignificant can leave me bawling my eyes out. This morning’s example is from the movie I posted a link about for Luca. It’s a good movie, one I love, but when I read the credits about the real Red Dog and how a town erected a statue for him when he died I lost it.

I’ve been like this most of my life but I don’t understand why. Does anyone else have similar experiences?
Click to expand...
I wonder… Could it be that you present more empathy towards injustices pertaining to animals ?
 
Chameleon In Recovery said:
I wonder… Could it be that you present more empathy towards injustices pertaining to animals ?
Click to expand...
Possibly, animals and children. Seeing a lot of what's going on in the Ukraine doesn't really disturb me, but seeing interviews with some of the refugees living in other countries gets to me.
 
I can relate to you ! As usual.

Have you seen the movie Hatchi: A Dogs Tale ? (Based on a true story) I cried for 2 hours after it was done. I couldn’t stop. Things like war, politics, death .. don’t effect me like the injustice towards an innocent being like an animal or child.
 
Politics drive me nuts. We shouldn’t be locked in a country. The world should be free . Same with having to BUY land. Everyone deserves a piece. Anyways I hate talking about that stuff , idk why I bring it up. I think it’s cool you’re a calming energy for others. Are you familiar with human design? I wonder if you are a Generator . (Generators give energy to others to explain vaguely) or even an Empath.
 
Chameleon In Recovery said:
I wonder if you are a Generator . (Generators give energy to others to explain vaguely) or even an Empath.
Click to expand...
Is that like when my fiance started screwing around on me and she told me it was my fault for empowering her?

Don't be sad, it was a very long time ago and my life turned out better for it.
 
VictorR said:
I am often quite saddened or sympathetic with stories and experiences even though I may not express it in my voice or words, whether oral or written. I never cry and even in writing, I have difficulty expressing emotions. As such, I love the "friendly" reaction we have here since I can use it to easily convey what I cannot find the words for.

I have gotten into trouble at work (social services) because I've had clients complain that I appeared to be unsympathetic to their circumstances.
Click to expand...

That’s tough. It sounds like your love language is acts of service . I recognize this in your willingness and desire to provide resources and solutions to everyone. Those who complained likely prefer words of affirmation and are looking for those NT non verbal ques that puzzle the eff out of most of us lol
 
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