Becoming nonverbal in stressful situations

[Sparky77]

I can sort of relate, sometimes my mind will be elsewhere and then someone will distract me and start talking to me but then I cannot focus on what they are saying and get upset by it even so I just repeat 'I don't know', 'I don't know' etc. If they keep talking it makes things even worse, my head gets too cluttered and I get annoyed with them and the situation and just have to get away from it. But even worse when it does happen it is usually at work and I get accused of being rude to them. But often it happens when they try to make small talk with me or ask me questions about myself that I do not like answering so hence I get stuck because I am no good at small talk and it's hard to get out of answering questions.

 

[Spiller]

I have an odd problem. When highly stressed due to either sensory overload or being in a situation with my triggers, and people are interacting with me, I suddenly loose speech.

it's like I no longer have access to the part of my brain that lets me speak.

If I really push myself in this situation, no words can come out, but sometimes a forced, pushed-out "Mmm...........mmm...." can make it through.

Saragrl, I think the words as normal, then it's like the part of my brain responsible for making them come out of my mouth is just.. gone!
Warmheart, I can force out a "bababa" noise, my mouth just doesn't do what my brain's telling it to!
I find this lasts about 20 minutes to half an hour, then speech just.. comes back.
Always in stressful/meltdown situations, usually with a new GP or therapist.
I now always carry a notebook and pen, and my sister, (though she gets heavy after a while, so I make her walk) to the GP, benefits agents, mental health stuff. Also she has to make phonecalls for me as I can't talk at all on the phone.

 

[Kirsty]

I'm always non-verbal in stressful situations or in the wrong company like today I had to work with a colleague who I hate and she hates me. I didn't have the energy to even say hi.

 

[Warmheart]

My gosh Spiller, that must make things frustrating, to be unable to telephone. My compassion for your struggles. I'm glad you have your sister to help you out, and bringing a pad and pen is a great idea. Thank you!

Kirsty, I'm so sorry things got stressful for you at work. You probably did the best you could under the situation, but even so, I can understand feeling frustrated afterwards too. I think you have lots of courage.

When I started this thread, I thought I would be the only one. I never tried to write with pen and paper when this happens. (Neanderthal Woman here, I have no cell phone) Is everyone else able to scribe when non-verbal and stressed? If so, maybe I could do it then, too.

 

[Kirsty]

My gosh Spiller, that must make things frustrating, to be unable to telephone. My compassion for your struggles. I'm glad you have your sister to help you out, and bringing a pad and pen is a great idea. Thank you!

Kirsty, I'm so sorry things got stressful for you at work. You probably did the best you could under the situation, but even so, I can understand feeling frustrated afterwards too. I think you have lots of courage.

When I started this thread, I thought I would be the only one. I never tried to write with pen and paper when this happens. (Neanderthal Woman here, I have no cell phone) Is everyone else able to scribe when non-verbal and stressed? If so, maybe I could do it then, too.

Thanks, Warmheart. You made me feel a bit better helping me see things from a different perspective instead of getting more down about the situation. Yeah I did my best and that's to completely avoid her. Everything I say or do is wrong in her eyes.

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

Warmheart, the process you describe...doesn't sound like Selective Mutism to me. It sounds much more like an anxiety/panic response, culminating in Psychogenic Conversion Aphonia...[where the voice is not completely lost, but is altered, as in hoarseness or whisper], as possible diagnoses. In adults, PCA/PCD are actually more likely, from what I've read...

I found this very helpful. Sometimes I can't find the words at all, sometimes I can find the words but speech actually hurts. When I can't talk, I either flee or meltdown (sometimes even the meltdown is silent). I don't stutter, but I repeat...palilalia...new word! This makes me happy.

 

[Harrison]

If I am pushed too far I can stop talking. In the past it has reduced me to tears because my head knows what I want to say but nothing will come out. It doesn't happen with any regularity now as I'm mostly alone, and most conversations I have with the public are scripted.

 

[Spiller]

In the past it has reduced me to tears because my head knows what I want to say but nothing will come out.

I panicked and cried the first few times too and you're right, it happens in unscripted situations.. I've learned to just accept it and reach for the notebook and pen now, but the embarrassment's hard to deal with

 

[watersprite]

My gosh Spiller, that must make things frustrating, to be unable to telephone. My compassion for your struggles. I'm glad you have your sister to help you out, and bringing a pad and pen is a great idea. Thank you!

Kirsty, I'm so sorry things got stressful for you at work. You probably did the best you could under the situation, but even so, I can understand feeling frustrated afterwards too. I think you have lots of courage.

When I started this thread, I thought I would be the only one. I never tried to write with pen and paper when this happens. (Neanderthal Woman here, I have no cell phone) Is everyone else able to scribe when non-verbal and stressed? If so, maybe I could do it then, too.

My therapist suggested something to me about this problem, (which I experience regularly too.)

I've a 3 x 5 card in my wallet on which I wrote: "I have a communication disorder; would you wait a moment for me to write what it is I need?"

Also, before I go to the doctor or other extra-anxiety inducing places I have to have a script written for myself ahead of time.

 

[watersprite]

Warmheart As to if I can do any writing while stressed and non-verbal, only partially sort of. I can write out a repeat of what I am after - whether it's an item or a point in a discussion, but I cannot properly respond to others' words. It is vitally important for me to have a script ready to go for all out and about interactions. Complicated ones such as discussing a project at the hardware store, require a detailed, written script which I look at before going in the store and keep in my hand.
For the grocery store and the like, I have my now automatic mask-with-script attached.

 

[Warmheart]

Good post, Kestrel. Love that: "Mask-with-script." Yup. Handy!