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Being alone..

Yeah, I usually do. At times people might appear close to my wavelength but I don't think they are as such.
 
Pretty much all my life...even when I was surrounded by people.

Always felt like I was on the outside looking in...
 
GallacticGorilla said:
Yes. Like I perceive the world differently, so I am never on people's wave length.
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Ya know what is interesting. I was thinking about it, I dont feel that way so much when I talk to you all in this forum. Thanks (:

I wish i had some aspie friends here. We could start an aspie gang. We would all get plaid pants and motor scooters, and maraud about town.
 
poetofthemist94 said:
Does anyone ever feel so alone inside. Like knowone understands you and how you feel deep down.
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I really don't know any neurotypical person who comes close to understanding how I feel being me. I'm glad for places like this where I can talk to other people like me.
 
Yes and no. I am fortunate enough to have a couple of very empathetic friends in whom I can confide, and even if they don't completely "get it," I at least know that on some level they understand me. But I don't see them very often anymore, and most of my human interaction comes from my retail job which, AS or no, most people would agree isn't any sort of meaningful relationship. And I'm not very close with my co-workers, though they are friendly and I like them (a rarity these days!).

Unless you count my therapist, who, even for someone in his field, has an uncanny knack for understanding what's going on in this strange little brain of mine...heh.
 
I've never really had friends that made me feel comfortable. So I find peace in my own company. No expectations and no anxiety. I sometimes see groups of people that make me feel alone. But my memory of those times are not ones filled with good times.
 
I find that how alone I feel has a direct correlation with the amount of people I am surrounded by:

Basically, the more people I'm surrounded by, the more alone I feel. Having people around just reminds me that I don't really fit in with those people. I can hold a conversation with one person fairly well but as soon as all that person's friends turn up and a little circle of conversation develops, I always find myself outside that circle, not involved in the conversation anymore. The more people join in, the less involved I become.
 
Sportster said:
You said precisely what I was thinking!!! As for the Aspie gang, I'm all for it. We could be the 1 percenters of all other Aspie gangs. I'll even wear the plaid pants. However, rather than a motor scooter, can I ride my Hog?:cool:
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'Other Aspie gangs'? I live in a low population state and other Aspies are far & few between. However I like the idea. We could go around boring people with obscure information.
 
Turk said:
I
Yeah Aspie gangs. You know? We we all stand in a group looking at the ground, banging heads, doing fresh air high five's .
And correcting other gangs graffiti spelling mistakes
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Don't forget group stims and petting stray cats, lol
 
Axeman52 said:
I find that how alone I feel has a direct correlation with the amount of people I am surrounded by:

Basically, the more people I'm surrounded by, the more alone I feel. Having people around just reminds me that I don't really fit in with those people. I can hold a conversation with one person fairly well but as soon as all that person's friends turn up and a little circle of conversation develops, I always find myself outside that circle, not involved in the conversation anymore. The more people join in, the less involved I become.
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Wow i've always felt this way too. I didn't know anyone else did too.
 
I feel like I exist on one frequency, and they exist on a completely different frequency. We pass each other by but never connect. The harder I try to connect through that misconfiguration, the more alone I feel. It's like I'm sitting here in this deep, deep place, waiting for someone to be able to reach that deep, but everyone else is just buzzing around way up in the air somewhere, and I never got my wings.

Problem is...when others do come along who can go that deep, they've learned from the school of hard knocks how to protect themselves and keep everyone out, even those who might be able to connect there. So we sit there staring at each other across a crowded room (but not at the same time, lol--no eye contact!) and never accept the reality of different-ness long enough to consider having anything in common with anyone else, ever.
 
DogwoodTree said:
I feel like I exist on one frequency, and they exist on a completely different frequency. We pass each other by but never connect. The harder I try to connect through that misconfiguration, the more alone I feel. It's like I'm sitting here in this deep, deep place, waiting for someone to be able to reach that deep, but everyone else is just buzzing around way up in the air somewhere, and I never got my wings.

Problem is...when others do come along who can go that deep, they've learned from the school of hard knocks how to protect themselves and keep everyone out, even those who might be able to connect there. So we sit there staring at each other across a crowded room (but not at the same time, lol--no eye contact!) and never accept the reality of different-ness long enough to consider having anything in common with anyone else, ever.
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Yes. Incredibly frustrating, isn't it? But at least you know you aren't alone in this universe.
 
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