Born in the wrong decade

[Shawn D]

Why is it so hard for people to accept the basic fact that men and women, boys and girls, are just equal? Of course, it would be silly to deny the obvious physical differences between the sexes, as well as developmental difference in boys and girls, but oftentimes when the 'differences' between boys in girls are mentioned in an argument about gender equality, it tends to go beyond simply who has greater upper body strength and ventures into intellectual territory. I don't see people trying to negate the fact that that men are built to be stronger on average (although some like to childbirth throw in the issue of childbirth just to spice it up), but that these facts are more of general guidelines in which many variations can occur depending on different circumstances. Equal doesn't always have to mean the same size or weight, it can mean the same value, which I would believe most people are trying to aim for.

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[Alcyon]

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Oh noooo! The link gave me an error message.

 

[Shawn D]

Oh noooo! The link gave me an error message.

Let's try this again...

 

[Full Steam]

Pre-roman Britain.

The Romans change too many things, and we're out of touch with nature.

I love the mysticism and mythology of those times.

I like life now that the internet is so good. The '80s and 90's were a bit rubbish though.

I was of the opinion that humanity was moving in the right direction, and that we were at the start of a new enlightenment.

Then brexit and trump happened and I realised we are a nats ass away from a new dark age.

 

[Myrtonos]

I wouldn't say I think I was born in the wrong decade, but there are a few periods of History that I wish I could go to... Wouldn't want to live in any of them though, life is much, much better now!

But you have said that you find online interaction easier than in person. Remember that online interaction is a recent thing.

 

[Bellatrix]

You seem to remember somewhere here in the Australian state of Victoria in the 1970s.

Yes, you guessed correctly (unless I put it on my profile here - will have to check).

Personal computers were introduced in the 1970s, but they were rare. Landlines phones (just called telephones in those days) had been around for decades before even you were born, yet you say many people didn't have landlines. Were you living in rural Victoria?

No, not rural Victoria - South Melbourne. Albert Park to be specific, and in school I don't recall anyone ever mentioning that they had a home phone. We certainly didn't, we were too poor and didn't need one anyway.

Though you may not have had the internet, there was, and still is something called amateur radio. Back then, it was the only way to go communicating with people far away than you had never met in the way you can on a forum like this today.
Is anyone reading this a licenced radio amateur?

Do you mean CB radio? Sounds like it.

In our country it was, but maybe it wasn't overseas. It was unusual, outside the ham radio community, for a non-notable person to interact with someone (far away) they had never met in person. There were also many more localities where the locals all knew each other by name and address.

Yes, I don't know what it was like in other countries, it may have been - probably was, actually - very different. We didn't even get colour T.V. until 1975!

 

[Bellatrix]

Yes, what about toxic femininity?

To tell the truth, I have only recently come across it myself. From this person - "Voltaire's Ghost"

It's a funny clip, even if you find yourself disagreeing with him.

Perhaps because this is what these women face in their daily life, which they are hoping to improve?

Makes sense.

I don't understand why its so darn 'uppity' to fight against objectification, considering such attitudes perpetrate the idea that women can't be smart since they're just pieces of meat. Not to mention, it contributes to the acceptance of sexual harassment and abuse towards both genders. Women because they're disposable and worthless, unable to cause any sort of harm, and men because they're strong no matter what, and always want sex.

Oh for goodness sake... "always want sex"?! Are you sure you aren't stereotyping there?

Especially if the woman is attractive, then there's no way the man could have not wanted it (unless she's ugly,then he's been scarred for life).

No, that's not true. This may - just may - come as a surprise to you, but there are many of us males who actually DON'T think of sex 24/7. I am one of them, by the way.

As you can see, objectification reduces women (in this case, at least) down to appearances, which allows for all sorts of disrespect to happen to both genders. As for the glass ceiling you mention, the first point applies. I don't see what's wrong with trying to be successful in you career and hoping to break the boundaries that have been in place for a long time. After all, a career takes up a lot of your life, so naturally you would think about it often. As to the issue of honour-killings, I see the oppression of third-world women brought up often in these discussions. Usually, its just a device to try and take away from what women in the western world are trying to achieve instead of genuine passion for the subject.

Wrong! It's a genuine concern.

It's like saying that you can't care about any of the problems the western world faces, like poverty or education just because other countries have it worse. Besides, do you think about developing countries every day of your life, and when you face a problem you decide not to do anything about it just because other people may have it worse? If not, feminists shouldn't be expected to do the same.

Actually, it's pretty hard NOT to think of the so-called Third World and its problems every day, because as anyone who has internet access and follows the news would know, Third World issues are constantly discussed, in various forms, on various forums, platforms et cetera. So yes, I do think of these things on a daily basis, but I often wish I didn't have to because it's so depressing.

Yes, there should be more attention given to these situations, but honestly, how much do you think the average woman could do to help a distant country without having the money and social power in order to make a difference, especially if she's not given the respect she deserves?

Oh come on, now you're just making excuses. The very first thing that could be done would be for so-called feminists in the West to stop making excuses (ex. "it's an aspect of their culture, and we have to respect that" - Germaine Greer) for the barbaric and utterly abhorrent behaviour of males in the less-developed world. That would be a positive start, don't you think? It wouldn't cost money, resources - just a simple refusal to live in denial.

Perhaps these women feel helpless to try and stop genital mutilation of honour-killings because they're belittled for caring about issues that genuinely affect them in their own lives?

An example?

After all, its quite hard to help others when you can't help yourself. I'm not trying to say that women in the west are in some sort of ball and chain and can't do anything about problems in other parts of the world, but I hope that you can see why that might pose as a problem, and it not their #1 priority.

Yes, I can see how many may not be in the best position to really care about the plight of others half way across the world, but when I wrote what I did above I had primarily those feminists in mind who like to get on their soap-boxes and whine about how disadvantaged they feel themselves to be, even though they live in the culturally affluent and progressive West and generally have university degrees with high-paying jobs.

 

[Myrtonos]

Albert Park to be specific, and in school I don't recall anyone ever mentioning that they had a home phone. We certainly didn't, we were too poor and didn't need one anyway.

Really? But I thought landline phones were a standard instalment in homes decades ago.

Do you mean CB radio? Sounds like it.

While the Citizen's band can be used non-commercially, amateur radio is a different band. Amateur radio operators need licences to transmit and to get them they need certain technical knowledge, particularly in regard to radio transmission. Ham radio transceivers, unlike C.B radio equipment, doesn't need type approval. But ham radio can only be used for business.

Yes, I don't know what it was like in other countries, it may have been - probably was, actually - very different. We didn't even get colour T.V. until 1975!

The rest of the developed world did have colour T.V sometime before that. Even New Zealand had it earlier than us. We also got rid of television licences that same year, and I believe this was due to the prevalence of independent television broadcasters.
One could only wish we had cable television back then, with the A.B.C still having a monopoly over wireless T.V.

 

[Bellatrix]

Really? But I thought landline phones were a standard instalment in homes decades ago.

Hmm... maybe you and I are from nearby alternative realities, because I am 100% certain that the house we lived in did not have a phone connection.

 

[Bellatrix]

I like life now that the internet is so good. The '80s and 90's were a bit rubbish though.

What?! Why? Okay, we had Ronnie Raygun and Thatcher in power, but overall people were generally nicer than they are now. As for the internet, we just didn't need something like that back then. We had other ways of communicating (ex. the mail, phone, in person), and if someone had tried to promote something like "Facebook" or "Twitter" back then they would have been laughed at, because virtually no one wanted to spend all, or most, of their time in the narcissistic pursuit of "likes", whilst they developed poor eyesight and diabetes.

I was of the opinion that humanity was moving in the right direction, and that we were at the start of a new enlightenment.

Then brexit and trump happened and I realised we are a nats ass away from a new dark age.

So... you thought that humanity was moving in the right direction, even though prior to Brexit and the success of Donald Trump we still had growing levels of unrest, war, fanaticism, extreme politics, environmental issues, overpopulation, et cetera, ad infinitum?

Actually, Brexit was the right thing for the British to do, because the E.U. is a colossal, bureaucratic monster that hampers economic progress and development, and subverts democracy. Good riddance to it I say! As for Trump, well look on the bright side - you almost ended up with Hillary, and she would have been far worse.

 

[Full Steam]

The 80's were a nightmare - I hated most of the music, TV and film.

It was narcissistic, vain, the era of the yuppie, and sucked all the soul out of the world that the 70's created.

The 90's were much better, but we had no internet.

Phones are horrible methods of communication in the main.
Letters are just as bad, and I've never sent one ever.
In person hasn't changed.

The internet has provided world wide communication with a medium that's right for anyone.

Social, email, forums, Q&A, chat rooms.

Additionally the access to information allows anyone to become an expert in anything, and now anyone with a PC can start a business and compete world wide.

I believe it's mankind's greatest invention, and it's helped my life in more ways than I could ever express.


As for Brexit & Trump, they are votes for exclusion of minorities. For fear, and for the right wing nutcase liars that will stoop to any length for power.

I'm not a Hilary fan, but I'd have anyone but Trump or anyone like him.

 

[The Phantom]

To tell the truth, I have only recently come across it myself. From this person - "Voltaire's Ghost"

It's a funny clip, even if you find yourself disagreeing with him.

Interesting clip. However, what I got from the video is that commentator is taking the term toxic masculinity as the condemnation and stereotyping of men, rather than the condemnation of stereotyping men (and its subsequent harms). Then again, this was only from one watch, so perhaps I've analyzed it incorrectly.

Oh for goodness sake... "always want sex"?! Are you sure you aren't stereotyping there?

No, that's not true. This may - just may - come as a surprise to you, but there are many of us males who actually DON'T think of sex 24/7. I am one of them, by the way.

I think you misunderstood me... I know it's a stereotype. That's the point of mentioning it, I'm talking about how this kind of attitude about male sexuality is prevalent throughout media and in society in general (which would be a part of the previously-mentioned term toxic masculinity). Please keep in mind, I absolutely DO NOT believe in this stereotype, and in fact find it quite disgusting because of how its used to belittle male victims of sexual abuse (and just dislike it in general). I was just trying to use this to show how objectification reduces a woman to something less than human (making her just a body, or something of the sort), which allows for these kinds of stereotypes to happen and be perpetrated.

Wrong! It's a genuine concern.

Alright, fair enough. I was just making sure, because I get very upset when people try to use someone else's suffering as a bullet point on their lists of why feminists are evil (As a similar example, some people like to use instances of female-on-male rape as a reason they hate feminism without giving a damn about male rape victims). However, if you truly care about this, then I'm glad. Unfortunately, not everyone on the internet is like this.


Actually, it's pretty hard NOT to think of the so-called Third World and its problems every day, because as anyone who has internet access and follows the news would know, Third World issues are constantly discussed, in various forms, on various forums, platforms et cetera. So yes, I do think of these things on a daily basis, but I often wish I didn't have to because it's so depressing.

Okay, that makes sense, I guess i should have been more specific. Its completely normal to think about developing countries every day (especially if you frequently check the news), however do you think about them whenever you are frustrated? If you have something in your life that genuinely upsets, do you just think of the third-world extreme and instantly feel better because you have nothing to complain about? What I'm trying to get at is, just because your own problems aren't as objectively 'bad', doesn't mean that you aren't allowed to feel upset about it. Such as in the instance of depression (a very real illness), this kind of attitude (someone always has it worse than you) usually will only make the depressed party feel worse, not to mention much incredibly guilty, which obviously doesn't do any good. I'm not saying all women who complain about their own experiences of sexism are depressed, but this is just an example.

Oh come on, now you're just making excuses. The very first thing that could be done would be for so-called feminists in the West to stop making excuses (ex. "it's an aspect of their culture, and we have to respect that" - Germaine Greer) for the barbaric and utterly abhorrent behaviour of males in the less-developed world. That would be a positive start, don't you think? It wouldn't cost money, resources - just a simple refusal to live in denial.


How am I making excuses? I would be one of those so-called feminists in the west, and I absolutely do not condone any of the awful sexism that goes on in less-developed countries, or any of the human rights violations in general. However, your phrasing seems to suggest that every single man in the third world are absolute barbarians. Speaking from experience, my parents come from a third-world country, which in the news in notorious for sexual violence against women. Like I said before, these kind of instances disgust me to no end (I have known people personally who have been on the receiving end of it), and I hope for a reform in the attitudes of said country in regards to many social issues. However, I think what people are trying to do is accept that not every person from these countries are disgusting, filthy, unworthy of respect just because of a prevalent attitude which can vary form person to person (because to some people, individuality in opinions only exists in the west, although I can attest from my own experience this is not true) Is it unfortunately widespread? Yes, but that doesn't mean that you should treat an entire nation of people as one single entity. After all, the point of getting rid of sexism (aside from equal rights, however successful you think that cause has been) is to stop thinking of a group of people as homogenous, so I would think the same attitude applies in other situations. As for the quote you've added, its a good point, but don't you think that it would be used to apply to accepting sexism in the west as just a fact of life, instead of having people do something about it?

An example?


Sexual objectification, for one. Aside from my previously mentioned points, catcalling is a common byproduct which girls as young as 12 are affected by , and in general make women feel unsafe. Especially in big cities, if you ignore the man catcalling you, he can call you names or even follow you around, which I would think scares young girls immensely. It may seem like objectification only affects grown women, but it can apply to any girls that is physically developed, no matter how young.


Yes, I can see how many may not be in the best position to really care about the plight of others half way across the world, but when I wrote what I did above I had primarily those feminists in mind who like to get on their soap-boxes and whine about how disadvantaged they feel themselves to be, even though they live in the culturally affluent and progressive West and generally have university degrees with high-paying jobs.

I understand that this 'whining' seems silly, and I agree it can sometimes go to very perplexing extremes. However, in the end, while sexism in the east and sexism in the west are at very different, in reality they are different degrees of the same attitude and general line of thinking when it comes to women. That's why its important to get rid of it in all its forms, lest in the case of a new social era these seemingly-trivial issues can regress back into something worse. It may seem a bit dramatic, but its happened before, and with recent events in mind it could very well happen again. That doesn't just go for sexism, but all forms of prejudice. Just because it seems less extreme that another example doesn't make it any less a part of a bigger problem.

 

[Alcyon]

The Phantom , nicely done!

I personally found the video flat, unconvincing, and embarrassingly unsophisticated: if Voltaire was alive, he'd sue and win. Or write a play skewering the writer.

Mostly, I couldn't get the vision out of my head of the presenter calling up from the basement apartment at his parent's house: "Mom, I made a video, can I post it on the interwebs???"

 

[Myrtonos]

Actually, Brexit was the right thing for the British to do, because the E.U. is a colossal, bureaucratic monster that hampers economic progress and development, and subverts democracy. Good riddance to it I say! As for Trump, well look on the bright side - you almost ended up with Hillary, and she would have been far worse.

Maybe Ireland will follow suit, this would geographically make sense.

 

[sidamo]

Oh no not politics! And certainly not USA politics, that's the worst kind ;-)

If we have to discuss politics, we only stand strong as aspies if we stand as one so I propose we all share MY opinion!

Just kidding. None of the politics. But a decent and affordable health care system is something a civilised country simply has to have.

 

[Merilthel]

Hi everybody,

I often imagine what it would be like to have grow up in the 1950's or 1970's. I think that I can relate more to people of those times.

Does anyone else think about what it would be like to live in another time?

Thank you

All the time, I personally was born in the 80ies and eventhough it was a problemfree time for me, I sometimes wish I had been born in the 70ies because of the music they played back then!!

 

[WereBear]

I am shocked and dismayed that Aspies can be bigoted! Hasn't our own oppression taught us the outright stupidity of that?

 

[kris]

I don't think wrong decade for me so much as wrong century or planet. I used to obsess over different civilizations quite a bit.

For the most part, right now I'm pretty happy to be alive at this time, but I do socialize much better with people about 10 years older than me.

 

[kris]

I was of the opinion that humanity was moving in the right direction, and that we were at the start of a new enlightenment.

Then brexit and trump happened and I realised we are a nats ass away from a new dark age.

100% agree and find it very scary. Like a distopic science fiction book.

 

[Merilthel]

100% agree and find it very scary. Like a distopic science fiction book.

Still there is some good forces out there, that wants to live for a better planet and for a better humanity, we should not forget that though all of the negativity around us such as Trump and Brexit has happened, we also have to look at the positivity that WE can contribute to this planet!! This year of 2017 I believe we can change this planet for the better!