Can Asperger's get worse as you age?

[abby normal]

I don't know anymore, I'm just tired. I'm ready for the summerlands.

 

[BlueConundrum]

I don't have an official diagnosis yet so I hope I'm not intruding. I am getting worse, but I fluctuate a lot with age. I've become more of a recluse. I've always been a loner, but I've usually had at least some friends. I no longer talk to anyone unless I have to.

I have developed new symptoms within the past six years or so. Like someone upthread mentioned, comorbids are definitely worse.

That said, I was better than ever two or three years ago after being in a bad, nonfunctional place for a couple of years. Now I am back in a bad, nonfunctional place. These things come and go.

 

[abby normal]

after taking a nodoze and decompressing from a long tough day, I can say that I have learned how to make peace with my life as it is rather than how I would have had it had I ready access to the levers of control over such. I have learned workarounds over many things. I guess the serenity prayer has been my unofficial mantra.

 

[Marmot]

From my experience, I don't particularly think that aspergers gets worse per se, but the changing societal acceptance of your behaviors & mannerisms (as you age) can definitely make it seem & feel worse.

Case in point: When I was younger, people easily said of my strangeness "Oh, he's young, he'll grow out of it...." But then of course, as you age you eventually hit a point to where you're considered an adult, no matter who's looking at you. -And here is where the "Oh he's young, and he'll grow out of it" excuse no longer applies and you are looked at (and treated) as truly weird / strange etc.....

In terms of aspergers and societal acceptance, it is just so much more socially acceptability to be 'weird' when you're younger!

 

[Aspergirl4hire]

No. What's happening to me is I have less patience and energy to "hide" and so real me comes out more often and stays out. I don't always appreciate it, but as I've gotten older I've gotten more scripts to cope with the consequences.

The older I get, the more likely I am to demonstrate a degree of independence from expectations: having a job and a little money in the bank will do that. Took a while to get there.

 

[On the Inside]

The older I get, the more likely I am to demonstrate a degree of independence from expectations: having a job and a little money in the bank will do that. Took a while to get there.

I have finally become adult enough to start working on creating that degree of independence from expectations. I am taking steps to re-awaken some of my old strengths and interests, and try to do a better job at making them pay off.

 

[BIMOG]

As a young child I attempted to fit in and failed miserably. Now I no longer try to be someone that I'm not. Consequently my autistic traits are now more obvious, because I no longer try to disguise them. Nobody thinks it unusual for a 10 year old to have toys but as you get older and yet your interests remain the same people tend to raise an eyebrow and wonder what planet you're on.

 

[Asbestos1]

I'm finding it seems to be getting worse, I'm 49 and am having noticeable trouble looking people in the eye when I talk to them when since a teenager I have never had a problem. Also I'm a lot more confused at work when a load of bookings come in organising that I would have taken in my stride previously has now become very difficult. With the acceleration of information tech and social media I am also finding it increasingly hard not to get distracted (but I think that common to not just us). Was researching online and found that they find similarities between alzheimers and aspbergers- not what I wanted to hear. My wife feels like she has to organise everything now and I didn't notice that I wasn't organising anything? Consuming more and more caffeine to concentrate and alcohol to relax. Don't have a problem sleeping.
Anybody else noticed anything specific that has got worse?

 

[abby normal]

I'm finding it seems to be getting worse, I'm 49 and am having noticeable trouble looking people in the eye when I talk to them when since a teenager I have never had a problem. Also I'm a lot more confused at work when a load of bookings come in organising that I would have taken in my stride previously has now become very difficult. With the acceleration of information tech and social media I am also finding it increasingly hard not to get distracted (but I think that common to not just us). Was researching online and found that they find similarities between alzheimers and aspbergers- not what I wanted to hear. My wife feels like she has to organise everything now and I didn't notice that I wasn't organising anything? Consuming more and more caffeine to concentrate and alcohol to relax. Don't have a problem sleeping.
Anybody else noticed anything specific that has got worse?

you have a wife and what sounds like a "head" job so from my perspective you already are doing relatively well, would that I could do as well. anyways, mine has not gotten "worse" in that I've learned some workarounds/avoids to keep me out of more trouble.

 

[Asbestos1]

you have a wife and what sounds like a "head" job so from my perspective you already are doing relatively well, would that I could do as well. anyways, mine has not gotten "worse" in that I've learned some workarounds/avoids to keep me out of more trouble.

Thanks for the reply. I guess I've been lucky have been able to use aspie focus to become an expert in my field of asbestos in buildings and build a career out of it. Now have my own company and one of my daughters is also Aspbergers (how I found out I was). Even right now I should be writing reports but am distracted by this.

 

[abby normal]

^^^prego I hope your daughter finds her niche in a hurry. the only way I could avoid the distractions you referred-to would be to turn off all but the work pages on the ol' puter.

 

[On the Inside]

I have been able to function well enough to have a decent career, own a house, have a family, but it has taken a toll. I was diagnosed a couple of years ago, and while the shift in consciousness has helped with my concept of self, which has been turning out to be a big positive, the realization of how dysfunctional a lot of my coping strategies had become leaves me feeling like I'm starting over. So I would say that it hasn't really gotten worse, but it has been a struggle to deal with realizing that there are a lot of things that I'm just not good at, and I'm tired of trying, or acting like I am.

My wife feels like she has to organise everything now and I didn't notice that I wasn't organising anything?

I get the same complaint from my partner, but I think she tends to over-organize, andI felt like I was helping, but she's right, I can't organize well at all, never really could. But as I stated above, I'm tired of trying to be good at something that I'm not good at, so I will try to organize things, pack for trips, plan for projects, I will do my best, but I'm not going to stress out trying to do everything perfect. I will make mistakes and I am OK with that.

 

[Ste11aeres]

I feel like certain aspects of my Aspergers have decreased as I've gotten older, while certain other aspects have gotten stronger.

 

[Astroganga]

In some ways yes, in other ways no. I'm a lot less sociable now and struggle with saying things too abruptly more than ever; but I can do some things, if forced to that I just couldn't before, applying for certain things for example. I do worry about when I am really old though as to how I will cope without outside support.

 

[On the Inside]

I am also a lot less sociable. I am so very aware of how out of step I have become with those who would be my peers. When I was younger, it was easier to be an oddball and still convince myself that I had potential, was somewhat with-it. Everyone else seemed to be struggling, trying different things, making mistakes and starting over. Then when I hit my forties, it seemed that everyone else was hitting their stride, having loving and functional relationships, building careers, reaching goals and milestones, while I found myself floundering worse than ever. I really have no interest in socializing beyond very casual, activity based socializing, I really don't want to let anyone get to really know me, and that bothers me a bit.

 

[CDOCONNOR]

Huh... Like a lost puppy that was put on the streets, huh? That's actually a really good analogy. I do tend to think of myself as a lost/confused puppy at times as well as an awkward turtle.

I've wondered the exact same thing. I can only say from experience that it all depends on the person. I've learned to deal with disappointment a lot better and can easily bounce back.

 

[JoshuaElrod]

Theres something that mskes me not do things I want to talk to me but its too difficult so many people everywhere and of I say or do one thing wrong people will laugh at me just cant learn how to he social its like im an alien to the world I dont think or do like them

 

[JoshuaElrod]

Mine has resurfaced almost full force since menopause, that's why its a surprise. Recall as a child that I had lots of social difficulties and was always fighting with other children, spent a good deal of time reading and drawing on my own. In a large family all I wanted was to be left alone. I want the exact same thing as an adult.

I do find that although I'm able to fit in and function quite well as an adult pretty much in any situation, through long life experience, I've discovered that I avoid those situations more and more as I age. My tolerance levels for situations like weddings, parties, reunions, has changed, I no longer like these social gatherings and see them differently from the way I used to. Fact is, I don't have to socialize as much as I near retirement and I would rather have time to myself and my own interests.

Having to socialize before this, was a necessity with both my husband's and my job, and keeping in contact with friends and relatives. Find doing the social stuff disruptive, and often annoyingly complicated, moving about, schedules disrupted, food on the road often awful, not sleeping properly. People who invite you to these things often think its easy to simply pick up, pack and go, and show up on the date and time they picked. I hate this sort of thing, and do these things less and less. As I've aged, I've become less and less social.

Huh... Like a lost puppy that was put on the streets, huh? That's actually a really good analogy. I do tend to think of myself as a lost/confused puppy at times as well as an awkward turtle.

True

 

[CDOCONNOR]

Theres something that mskes me not do things I want to talk to me but its too difficult so many people everywhere and of I say or do one thing wrong people will laugh at me just cant learn how to he social its like im an alien to the world I dont think or do like them

What exactly is the problem my friend? What do you wish to do? Feel free to private message me and we can discuss this

 

[thom&bonnie]

The hormones of adolescence or menopause can make for a spectacularly bumpy ASD ride.

Developing but unsuspected food intolerances happen as we all age. We lose our effectiveness in ability to filter out substances we develop intolerances to (even when as yet unaware of this intolerance), so caffeine, gluten, lactose, and other potential irritants can make meltdowns and fog-outs more likely. Brains have to contend with whatever crosses the blood-brain barrier, including stuff we don't yet know we're intolerant to. Since ditching gluten, fewer meltdowns and a clearer mind make my ASD notably easier-- and it was getting more challenging before.

Responsibilities put us in sensory-overload-rich environments. As adults, we can't always crawl into our hidey-holes. We are front & center at the bank, post office, crowded grocery, riding noisy buses, trains. Sensory overload freak-outs a-plenty!

Nutrition may become less of a priority. As kids leave home, adults cook less, and rely on simple meals more. Toast and tea doesn't feed a brain the way a more nutrient-dense meal would.

We may skimp more on exercise. Adults who drive cars, have busy jobs, have kids, or have achy joints may exercise less. Regular exercise helps provide the vestibular and proprioceptive sensory input many ASD brains crave. Without this to self-regulate, our moods and frustration tolerance can plummet. Remembering to add in regular walking, swimming, dancing, etc. can help lots!

Just some considerations.

Excellent and informative response Warmheart! Thank you for being here.