@saraaa
I'll let you in to a "not secret but it might as well be".
NT's have no idea why they do what they do either. If you ignore what they say, and pay attention to what they do, and think about the nature of the gap between those two, you'll see plenty of evidence.
There's more to this story, but I won't go on. Instead, two questions:
Why is a "greater purpose" necessary to
you?
If
you really believed (100%) what I said about NT's above, would it help you find your balance in the NT-dominated world?
NB: "I said if
you believed" because I do already.
I've found it to be accurate enough (it's hard to test, so that's as good as it can ever be), and very useful in practice.