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Chat Room, what, um, how? Why?

On the Inside

On the Inside

Well-Known Member
So I've only briefly viewed the chat room a few times, each time baffled as to how one would break into a conversation, are they conversations? Do you have to ease in and comment on what is being chatted about or can you barge in and take over the place? I don't know if I've ever encountered a "place" that is more socially awkward to me. Be clear, this is just me, reacting. No offense to those who enjoy and participate.
 
On the Inside said:
So I've only briefly viewed the chat room a few times, each time baffled as to how one would break into a conversation, are they conversations? Do you have to ease in and comment on what is being chatted about or can you barge in and take over the place? I don't know if I've ever encountered a "place" that is more socially awkward to me. Be clear, this is just me, reacting. No offense to those who enjoy and participate.
Click to expand...

I'm equally mystified. I gave up on it. But I often don't do well in group conversations either.
 
I've managed to use it a few times but I think my social anxiety makes it difficult to be in a real time conversation - I tried it out because I don't want to be a slave to my fears and actually had several rewarding experiences.

I found it best to start by saying 'Hi' to whoever was already there and waiting for a reaction.. don't just give up if you don't get one though.

On the Inside said:
I don't know if I've ever encountered a "place" that is more socially awkward to me. Be clear, this is just me, reacting. No offense to those who enjoy and participate.
Click to expand...


Yep, this was how I felt the first couple of times - it's really not that bad though, that's just that ol' anxiety talking :)
 
I know the feeling! To me it is the same as: seeing a group of people talking and joining in ie interrupting and wow, that is just something I really cannot do!

Been on chat a few times, but that is because someone says hi to me and ok, I do feel complimented when I see my name and do respond but only for a short while, as I feel it is rather overwhelming.

As I scroll down, I sense some chat and it comes across as if they are chatting into the "air". In LIFE it is: you say something in a normal tone and get completely ignored!
 
Feeling ignored isn't pleasant, but it can sometimes be because your self esteem is at a low ebb - certainly with us.. part of the package, I guess.
Keep in mind, though that, here, we all feel like that - try to remember that you're not being ignored..

.. It's Just the chat room! Like a swimming pool, you don't wait for an invite - you just jump in.

Maybe try again when you see someone you know?..

Hey, I shy away from it, but I still think it's a good thing and it can be enjoyable to make a real-time connection.

Susanne: Look.. <Chatting>

.. Go ooon, loook..
 
Thanks, I don't mean to disparage, I think I would like to try, but feel I would find it a big distraction if I got too involved. Either that or I would be whispering in the wilderness.
 
Guys...I think there are no rules in our chat room*
If you want, you can comment on what's already being said. If you want, you can burst in with something new.

*Don't take that too literally. There are still rules such as: be civil to other members, don't use it to express racial, religious, sexual, prejudice or other kinds of prejudice. Etc, etc. But there are no social rules there about whether you have to join in a pre-existing topic of conversation, or whether you can talk about something completely different.

It's very different from a real-life conversation. In real life, you might be interrupting someone. In the chat room, you're not interfering with their ability to continue typing whatever they want, so it doesn't matter.
 
Spiller said:
Feeling ignored isn't pleasant, but it can sometimes be because your self esteem is at a low ebb - certainly with us.. part of the package, I guess.
Keep in mind, though that, here, we all feel like that - try to remember that you're not being ignored..

.. It's Just the chat room! Like a swimming pool, you don't wait for an invite - you just jump in.

Maybe try again when you see someone you know?..

Hey, I shy away from it, but I still think it's a good thing and it can be enjoyable to make a real-time connection.

Susanne: Look.. <Chatting>

.. Go ooon, loook..
Click to expand...

Looked and responded and, where is Spiller? Mmmm good question lol and so: Go ooon, loook ;)
 
Chat is perfect for spectrumites...you get to script what you are going to post ahead of time,make adjustments to it and post it when YOU feel it is right.I hate rules,but common courtesy applies as anywhere you talk in real time and are necessary for it to stay on track in both environments. If you are getting ignored,maybe it is because some don't camp in the chat room and are not fixed to a conversation in real time. If you desire an intimate conversation,take it to private where your partners have your full attention.

I am not sure why anyone feels left out on the internet because you can post whatever you want. If you command an audience,then it is your win. If you don't,all you have lost is a bit of your time.
 
I've found 'Chat' good for a brief connection when I needed it - no pressure, just say 'Hi', leave when you want..

How our anxiety gets in the way, Ay!?

I find it a good way to alleviate 'contact' issues.
 
There is probably some situation where
I'd want to be talking with more than one
person at a time. I haven't thought of that
situation yet.

It wd be useful if I wanted to co-ordinate an activity.

Nitro The idea of scripting ahead of time,
in a chat. I never thought of that.

The population in the chat room always seems
random/unexpected to me. I don't know why
I would be seeking a random/unexpected
conversational encounter.

Empty chat room: tree enters and does a
Daffy Duck impersonation, doing handstands
and cartwheels. "Woo hoo woo hoo woo hoo."
Exits.
 
Nitro said:
you get to script what you are going to post ahead of time,make adjustments to it and post it when YOU feel it is right
Click to expand...


This does give you a little time - less than posts, but more than real-life.. I do find the adrenaline boost helpful as an aid to practice for spontaneous encounters though.
 
I guess I like the long form call and response of the traditional forum threads, and I have the patience to wait until someone responds. However, sometimes you can be off for a day or two and be completely left in the dust.

I'll see you sometime in the chat room. Just not now!:)
 
I like time to consider things before I reply to them so I'm okay with emails and letters but conversations, messaging and chatrooms require response times that are far quicker than I personally find comfortable, so I avoid them completely.
 
Utterly bewildering!! It's just too random and fast-paced for me, 3 or 4 conversations going on at once and by the time I'd script anything, everyone else would seem to have moved on. I'm not dim, just slow to process!
 
Chat moves too fast for me. It feels more like work, and I come here to hang out and chill a little, not work.

But I agree with others' advice. Just start talking about something if you want, and maybe there are others sitting there waiting for something more interesting to talk about, which is exactly what you might be offering. Or contribute to an ongoing conversation...usually, here, I would suspect that someone who had the courage to start a conversation will feel honored that you considered their topic important enough to comment on it.
 
I drop in sometimes & just say "Hi" or *waves* as intro & generally if folk are there they respond. There are times it seems vacated too.
 
Then there are those of us who use the iphone app, for whom the whole topic of chat rooms is moot.
Aren't we chatting here anyway?
 
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