Did you like going to church as a kid?

[Jeff T]

No, didn't like going to church. My brother and sister both went through catholic schools and church, and it didn't seem to leave much of an impression with either. I just went to CCD after public school let out. My sister says she considers herself a pagan.
We would get all dressed up going to catholic church. I guess it was sensory issues, but I found "church clothes" to be quite annoying, especially the 'church socks' which would always fall down to my ankles (non-church socks didn't).
It seemed odd to me that that we would be celebrating Jesus and God inside a man-made building with stained glass windows you couldn't see out of- walling off the world's beauty that was attributed to God.
Nature and science are my equivalents of God. I am at greatest peace outdoors- and find scientific findings of great interest.

 

[Jumpinbare]

Sunday school was my only safe place to socialize. The staff wouldn't allow bullying, name calling, etc. My friends were all from sunday school. In public school, the higher the grade, the more harassment I got. I stopped any attempt at socializing by 7th grade, except my established church friends. I never liked the loud PA system, but because of my interest in electronics, I was able to sit in the enclosed sound booth, eventually acting running the audio system.

 

[Twilight]

Yes. It was pretty much my only socialization. Smaller groups in Sunday school, so relatively more supervision. The staff did not allow bullying, teasing, etc. I could actually interact with the other kids. In regular school, the higher the grade, the more negative I was treated. By 7th grade, I stopped ANY effort to socialize.

It was my only form of socialization in 4th grade and then 6th grade on up because I homeschooled.

It wasn’t very beneficial, though. I didn’t have much in common with the people in my very strict church.

 

[Magna]

Sensory overload
Loud singing
Crying and screaming kids
People completely surrounding you
Pretending to sing the songs and wishing with every second of them that they'd be done
Shaking the bare hands of strangers
Fragrances and smells, perfume, cologne, laundry detergent, dryer sheets, bad breath, stale cig smoke of heavy smokers, farts
Threatening sermons
We're not worthy. We're sinful worms.
On top of all of that, with ADHD..being expected to actually tune all of that out and focus on the "message" and the scripture? Not bloody likely.

I never once looked forward to going to church.

 

[Twilight]

I actually liked singing the songs, depending on the song. It was the only time I wasn’t bored.

Other than that, I relate.

I was expected to sit still, and I was spanked often when I didn’t.

I dreaded going.

 

[Fino]

I didn't like it much, but I didn't hate it. Then I became an atheist and stopped going somewhere around middle school.

 

[Wolfnox]

I’ve been to a few. First one was Pentecostal, second was Baptist.
I enjoyed it well enough. But, after the preacher died we didn’t return.
I walk my own path with the Lord. Reading the Bible and learning threw life.
This is an unpopular path among many. Who believe you “must” be in a church.

 

[Shevek]

I didn't like having to get dressed up. I did like the opportunity to eat many sugar cubes in the basement kitchen adjacent to the children's lesson area.

 

[SusanLR]

My parents didn't go to church regularly.
When they did, they always brought me along and I didn't like it.
They were Pentecostal and when I saw people talking in languages I didn't know and dancing through the isles it was not comfortable.
My parents encouraged me to let the spirit in and do the same.
I didn't want that.

When I was nine and they saw I wasn't making friends, they coaxed me into going to Sunday school thinking I would like it there with the other kids.
I didn't like it and I was always bringing up the phrases being taught from the Bible that were not logical. Of course, that brought being reprimanded by the teacher
and by my mom.
But I just couldn't buy into taking it all as the truth. Like the Earth being created in six days to begin with.
So, I stopped going despite their desires.

 

[BryceMcBryde]

As someone who was still in the closet at the time, seeing my pastor stomp his foot like a toddler and yell about the Government allowing gay people to get married was something that’s still stuck with me since it happened. Unfortunately, from my experience, I have seen many Christians talk about Jesus loving everyone, despite making offhanded remarks about other cultures, sexualities and other religions.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

What was your experience like?

This is how I felt about it:

I liked it but was bored. I liked certain aspects of it but was bored by the summons and what they said.
I did like Sunday school on what I could remember.

I don't like faith now because I would only support a faith system where everyone felt welcome but still respected the traditions and I believe you should be able to be who you are and trust a God to be reliable in your life and only have your good in mind.
And I do not believe faith is like a cult where you have to bend over backwards to fit some box everyone else thinks you should only they are being fed lies about faith.
They think faith is like something that is akin to chains where Jesus should be the one you worship, no faith is freedom to those that believe in Christ and anyone who follows Christ is free and saved.
And actually I really believe Jesus Christ would want you to worship God, not him.
Faith was slightly better when I was younger because it felt a bit more liberating but still churches were still fairly empty like not a lot of people or families

 

[NB79]

No i didn't like it, for it was like school, boring and felt obligated to go, as kids we can ignore a lot of stuff however, and be immature, so, now i know God can be close to us, and this is more 'fun' to me that anything else.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

It does make me wonder how many people actually feel the same way we do - but they're just too scared to admit it and go their own way.

In many ways, it's similar to a cult, where if you choose to leave, your are ousted by everyone that remains in the group. It's a very real risk to those who may have limited resources to begin with. Even if you don't have money, you still have family and community to help support you. Once you exit the confines of that group, you are essentially on your own.

You are right it can seem like that where you feel unable to be yourself
And it should never be something that restricts people from being who they are or how they dress or their other beliefs.
I guess it is hard for autistics because they cannot follow rigid rules and structures and should not have to for a relationship with God.
But I think church is still very beautiful in the traditions it holds and hymns that are sung and obviously a relationship with God is very beautiful and treasurable as long as He let's you be yourself. Who else will love you unconditionally if God does not?
Everyone should always feel welcome in church no matter what

 

[NB79]

I’ve been to a few. First one was Pentecostal, second was Baptist.
I enjoyed it well enough. But, after the preacher died we didn’t return.
I walk my own path with the Lord. Reading the Bible and learning threw life.
This is an unpopular path among many. Who believe you “must” be in a church.

I mean, i woudln't go either if i not needed it, but i need, because its the only way to reliably get Gods presence, a good church that seeks God, because he promised that he will be there with us, when there are 2 or 3 of us reunited in his name.

 

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

Parents brought us every Sunday during a several years span. The only thing I liked about it was the stained glass patterns on the windows and the towering cathedral ceilings. Everything else I disliked then. The sermons, the music, the hard benches, the cold environment, etc. And then there was the severe anxiety of others sitting next to me, the collection plates passed down the aisles and the forced greetings and handshakes with stranger others during the services.

All that I saw as either boring, too structured or anxiety producing those years. We were forced to get dressed up formally at home prior to going and were told we had to be polite and could not move an inch at church. For those who benefitted from such services, great! For me, I rather have vacuumed the floors, cleaned the walls then than be told how to think, act and feel for something I did not believe in. I resorted to daydreaming to get me through those things my mind said I could not focuson without getting really upset.

That is sad I love the pews, the music, sermons and I think it is very steeped in tradition. And even being cold, it kind of gives in a very quiet and holy feeling where you feel close to God. And then you can go to a heated hall and have tea and biscuits.
And also I love the collection plates in terms of giving to others even like $1 dollar, giving is a very important part of being Christian in terms of works of charity and I love the greetings and handshakes. I find in church when you do handshakes you find the person's hand more warm.
But I can understand autistics when they say they do not like cold stuff and surroundings and handshakes because that may be so autistic for some as well as sensory issues.

 

[Crossbreed]

Did you like going to church as a kid?

It is just what we did, like watching TV before VCRs gave us more options.

I readily believed in God and His Bible, but some of that narrative was unclear to me until I got Born Again. After that, my first church seemed quite empty, because they glossed over some really important issues.
I have been to much more dynamic churches since then, but cannot go now because my daughter randomly bites people.

 

[Crossbreed]

It’s not just me, a lot of forums have rules against bringing up religion and politics.

In your profile, you are allowed to opt out of them.
That means others are free to opt in...

 

[Knower of nothing]

Churches are quiet and pretty. But uncomfortable and the presence of social dictatorship is even stronger there than at school or with family. You can't develop under those circumstances. I imagine its primary value is to disappear into conformity, which is frequently worth the price of the inevitable latent dissonance and people will go to far ends to allow it.

Why even bring this question up? Don’t most people find it controversial to talk about this kind of thing?

Not talking about it is dangerous in the long run. Respect for symbol and narrative should never come at the disrespect of the welfare of people and beings. I'm sure even religious institutions would in the end want to be seen as welcoming and comfortable. Where I live not too long ago it was pressured among families to attend mass to not lose standing with the neighborhood community. The amount of people that have dedicated life and soul to tradition they did not align with must be staggering across the centuries. The fact someone like me spent hours total in a church as a kid is reason for examination enough.

 

[Luca]

Later I came to the conclusion that the sanctity of my soul is primarily between God and myself. That religion itself plays no real part in my spiritual enlightenment on this temporary plane of existence.

This is basically the same for me.
I developed some *really not great* religious beliefs independently of my parents (adoptive family), because I was taught some religious stuff in school (i.e. no access to formal sex education, anti-choice scaremongering, and "lite" conversion therapy), and I picked up on some things in foster care, and from my adoptive grandparents. My dad is somewhat religious but not really, and I'm pretty sure my mom is just atheist at this point.

I got really into the whole Christian thing for a while, and now I'm going through the process of deconstruction and it is bringing up a lot of religious trauma.

Like you said in your post, my relationship with religion now is only between God and myself. I do support Unitarian Universalism, but I want nothing to do with most aspects of Christianity any longer, especially because of the emotional and spiritual harm it caused to me as a young LGBTQ person.

 

[Mary Terry]

Yeah. Our parents forced us to attend Sunday School, morning church, night church and Wednesday night prayer meetings.

I was dubious about all of it because the church condemned the drinking of alcohol as a mortal sin or something equally dire. When I was about 8 years old, the Sunday School teacher's lesson was about the miracles of Jesus. I raised my hand and asked why Jesus' first miracle was to turn water into wine at a wedding. The teacher said it was because the water was undrinkable where Jesus lived. I raised my hand again and asked why didn't Jesus turn the undrinkable water into drinkable water at the wedding. She became furious with me and told me to stop asking questions. And then there was the whole communion thing where Jesus used bread as his body and wine as his blood and we were supposed to consume it. My church used Welch's grape juice instead of wine.

I mostly identify as a Druid these days.