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Do you tell people you have autism?

Sometimes I do, sometimes not. I guess I'm experimenting with it a bit. I last told someone on Friday. Complete stranger, might bump into him again, but may well never see him again.

I'd yelled at a group of cyclists on a narrowish trail converted from an old railway, two of us wanted to pass them and they were taking up both sides, not paying attention. We spoke a tiny bit, he then pulled in front and we couldn't hear each other (the first 20 miles are dirt). When he pulled over to rest and turn around I stopped too. He'd suggested that I get a bell, but I didn't know that until we stopped and could really talk. I asked if ringing the bell might be more PC than yelling, and mentioned that I have Asperger's and am not always sure about what might be taken as offensive.

It's not always a good idea, but this time it was helpful. He'd recently read a book about Asperger's, and we discussed at some length how people might percieve communication in such circumstances, and how we might expect people to share the trail. I doubt we'd have had the same discussion if he hadn't realized that my perspective was potentially such a different one.

I've had friends insist that I can't have Asperger's because I'm too nice. That's not nice, but not such a problem either. Since they don't believe it, they will not be prejudiced because of it.
 
I learned very quickly in telling only the most important people in my social orbit that it was quite a mistake to do as such. Where my closest contact (my cousin who lives in town) seems to object to autism as even a legitimate issue, even though she has a professional background in healthcare services and insurance. In her case I truly wish I had never told her. It's been the source of a rift between us ever since.

My brother ironically seemed to be able to "connect-the-dots" looking back on our past enough to partially understand what I was telling him. And perhaps my only real friend seemed pretty neutral about it, whether he really understood it or not.

Bottom line for me was to realize that this is a crapshoot, best left only on a need-to-know basis only. Where there are no guarantees, no matter how close you perceive yourself to be with that person.

There are a very few who will try to understand and succeed. There will also be a few more who want to understand but will fail. And the rest are likely to be demanding or expecting that you to conform to a social and neurological majority, even if you unable to do so.
 
Nope, no, not a chance, never, no.
Not sure that was clear, no never ever ever.
...... No
...... No
...... No
In case you haven't guessed I did in the past and I do not care to repeat that experience.
It had an entirely negative effect on those realationships
 
I don't tell anyone because I'm tired of hearing, "but you don't seem autistic to ME." They never believe me so why bother.
 
I used to not tell anyone that I was autistic. It's a scary thing to say, since I have no idea how the other person will react, and I know there are a lot of people in that position. I've recently started telling people and it's actually helped them to understand me quite a bit. As of now I've only told this to other autistic people though, I've only told one NT so far besides my family.

To people who don't tell anyone, why not? If you do, who do you tell? Just close friends or people who you don't know as well? Do you think it helps?

I won't even with an official diagnosis. It might take some months/years until it's checked medically, but it will probably happen because it will definitely not go anywhere out of reach lol. I do all I can to check it. In the meantime, I don't even consider myself as "self diagnosed" because I see no value in it. No offense, but I think it's BS. Either there are tests done and the autism is checked and real, either it's a suspicion/conviction that I keep for myself until it's verified. So althrough I have a better relationship with myself and past (especially with childhood), it's something I don't share at all with other people in my life.
Even when verified through tests, I'm not sure I'll tell anyone. I don't believe other people would be interested unless it's a good subject for a new gossip. I don't care what they'd think about it or tell, I'm not curious about their opinions and comments. Most likely, a lot of people knowing me would say "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah that's whyyyyyyyyy", but I'm not sure about it either, and since I personally don't care whether they know or not, I don't think I'll ever talk about it with people in real life.
 
Usually it is far better to "claim" own identity regardless of condition.

Sometimes conditions including autism can be used to gather attention but I just feel it is backwards.
 
I did mention it on a webcomic forum I've posted on for over a decade, but only because I'm familiar with most of the people there. Other than that, it's a very need-to-know thing I don't bring up unless I know someone for a while. My case is so mild that it's barely noticable anyway.
 
Not unless they ask (either directly or about something that is one of my symptoms). Except for things like doctors or employers, for whom the information is more likely to be necessary. Basically, I know it can be an awkward thing to bring up sometimes, but I don’t know when is the right time and when isn’t, so I just don’t mention it unless I know I probably ought to. But “masking” isn’t really an option in my case, so there’s no point in trying to hide it, people can tell at a glance, I’m pretty sure, that something’s up with me.
 

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