Do you wish you had taken a different path?

[lovely_darlingprettybaby]

I see some good sometimes and then I am glad.
But
The amount of capacity I have to deal with always new pain and find healing.
At least if I had of taken a different path it would not hurt so much beyond my capacity to cope
And I would would not be so vulnerable to the hatred and spite of others and would be able to filter the people in my life
If the worst happened that I was unhappy with then I would deal with it without feeling hurt by others
I could be myself too
And live where I wanted to
And there is always some lie in my head that says I do not have the capacity too and
Have to be relient on others that have hurt me and it is so painful with bpd and trauma amd unsupportive parents and after abuse from a mother who could never be what you needed and just wanted to disown you.
I just want to run away
Because I know I would always be good to myself
I just do not if I am well enough to cope
I just want to be loved

 

[Mr. Stevens]

I definitely think about it. But, I suppose it's never a simple answer. There are things I can do intellectually, but the demands of the job (such as social interaction) are too much. Maybe those paths would be more fulfilling if doable, but they're just not practical on a daily level. I certainly realize where I could have made better choices, but--like all of us--I've had to survive in a world that isn't interested in understanding me. So I think I've done pretty well, considering. It's not like I've had much support or rejected great opportunities. I've had to make a lot of choices without being able to breathe much or meet my needs.

Probably the greatest relief is not blaming myself for what isn't my fault.

 

[AprilR]

I don't. I am protective of myself and my inner world and its the reason i was able to survive. Besides all roads lead to the same place so its all the same to me

 

[Gerald Wilgus]

A different path? NO. It has led to a varied and interesting life with a woman who is my soul mate. I joke that we were bound by the red string of fate so that despite our convoluted paths, we found each other.

The only things I wish I could have changed was to learn earlier how to be social, to learn the skills necessary to thrive, and to put myself out for others.

 

[Ronald Zeeman]

Now that I'm retired. I realized my original path not taken was not a mistake and basically letting the waves of life carry me to shore actually was better than swimming against the current.

 

[Suzanne]

Despite the sheer horror of something I had to do, due to hating cruelity etc and how it has crusified my life, I would do it again, but perhaps react differently.

However, yes, there is something particular, I would dearly would have loved to have taken a different path. But, since I can't, I do the best I can to live each day, rather than exist.

 

[Rodafina]

No way. I learned so much along this path and I would not want to waste all that knowledge and learning.

I’d rather deal with where I am right now than have fond wishes for the past.

 

[Judge]

I try not to ponder such things, as I believe that whatever path your mortal existence takes is the path you were metaphysically intended to follow.

 

[Masked Man]

I don't know. I try not to think about it. Are there decisions I made that I realize in retrospect weren't the best decision? Yes. But I feel like I did the best I could at the time with the information I had at the time. In other words, I am trying to be kinder to myself.

Additionally, although there are things I could improve, my current situation is pretty good. If I had made different decisions, I may not have what I have at the moment. It might be better - but it may also be worse.

 

[Diego]

I don't really think TOO MUCH about it, but no i don't really wanna change my path since i already took it and there's no way to go back, y'know?

 

[Kavigant]

I spent the first 33 years of my life living entirely the wrong life and getting it 100% wrong! I tried to brute-force my way through a neurotypical life, trying the old "fake it til you make it" approach. My God, I am so full of regret and painful memories.

BUT that entirely wrong life led me to where I am today: I am very happily married to the most amazing woman on the planet and I have four remarkable kids. All those mistakes, all that pain, led me to my incredible life today.

I tried to kill myself almost 30 years ago because I couldn't stand the pain. If that suicide attempt had succeeded, I never would have been able to have the life I have today.

My life today is not perfect; I still have challenges and I still make mistakes, but I am happy.

Please, everyone out there: don't give up. As long as you're alive, there's a chance for things to change for the better - especially if you keep working on yourself.

Forgiveness. Gratitude.

 

[Crossbreed]

Job wise, I wish I would have pursued higher math instead of graphic arts.
But had I done so, I would not have met the woman who is now my wife, so frustrated plans are not all bad.

 

[elgat0verde]

Oh yeah

In my whole life

But I won't get into details

Can't dwell on the past tho, you can always change your path and rebuild at any stage of your journey through life

 

[Tom]

Yes, I guess so.. But just once, one summer, when I waded shirtless thru a sea of Burning Nettles to explore a castle one time. I had never heard of Burning Thistle before, but found out.

 

[Outdated]

....when I waded shirtless thru a sea of Burning Nettles....

A valuable lesson in life shouldn't be regretted.

I've had a great life. It hasn't been without problems but they help me to appreciate the good times. No, I wouldn't change anything about my life or the different paths I chose.

 

[DaisyRose]

I do not wish to change my path. If I did, I would still be in school trying to get degree I never wanted. I would be miserable and exhausted because my mental health was at its lowest at the time. I also didn’t want to get my degree because I saw the classes I would have to take, which I had no interest in at all.

I would be forcing myself to do something I do not enjoy. What's the point of doing that? I’m so happy I did what I did and relied on my gut intuition because it was so right. I had to learn a lot of things to help me improve on my health issues. I was at my worst and it’s so refreshing to know I made it out alive and strive to do things that make me happy.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

I see some good sometimes and then I am glad.
But
The amount of capacity I have to deal with always new pain and find healing.
At least if I had of taken a different path it would not hurt so much beyond my capacity to cope
And I would would not be so vulnerable to the hatred and spite of others and would be able to filter the people in my life
If the worst happened that I was unhappy with then I would deal with it without feeling hurt by others
I could be myself too
And live where I wanted to
And there is always some lie in my head that says I do not have the capacity too and
Have to be relient on others that have hurt me and it is so painful with bpd and trauma amd unsupportive parents and after abuse from a mother who could never be what you needed and just wanted to disown you.
I just want to run away
Because I know I would always be good to myself
I just do not if I am well enough to cope
I just want to be loved

Q. Do I wish I had taken another path?

A. For perspective, do understand that "hindsight is 20/20". The decisions we make in life are a combination of all of the available knowledge, experience, cognitive bias, and emotional state. Everyone has made some poor decisions at one time or another. We later gain some wisdom, and perhaps, we choose differently if the situation arises again. We all live, or die, with the consequences of those decisions.

Sure, if I were a time traveler AND could see the potential results of alternate decision-making, then, and only then, might I choose a different path. There are many things I like about my life that I would not want to lose. I would have to study these pathways to only pick the one with the maximum amount of benefit.

Do consider your situation, @lovely_darlingprettybaby, the way you are feeling right now, the way you are interpreting your situation are a result of not only the people you've interacted with, but also how your brain processed that interaction. It's always a two-way street. Another "you", in a parallel universe, without your brain, might have had parallel, nearly identical interactions with the same people and simply never processed any of it the way you did, and as a result, would not have reacted the way you did.

Some people can look evil and death in the eye, smile back at it, walk away like just another day in the park, and never give it another thought. Others, cower in fear, run away traumatized, and it effects them the rest of their life. I am not sure who is the smarter or wiser of the two. You can make a case for both, I suppose. What I do know, is that both reactions are due to all the brain anatomy and physiology at play. Some people can process information and situations with very little emotional interference, and some people are always making decisions in an emotional state.

 

[Misery]

No.

Because the chain of events that led to having my dogs would not have happened.

 

[The Pandector]

Always felt I could live without regrets because I was always careful to make good decisions based on my knowledge. Can’t regret not knowing something.

Then, retired then widowed, I found out that I’m autistic. The man who intentionally lived without regret became absolutely buried in regret. Now I spend my days trying to forgive myself for ten thousand (and counting) things that I have learned to regret.

I know the lesson to learn is that all you can do is your very best, and that none of us makes decisions atop a bottomless pit of knowledge. Doesn’t matter; I’ll live out my days regretting every good decision I ever made, trying to forgive myself.

 

[Jacks Brain]

Given that aspergers is hereditary, the previous generation would have had to make different decisions as well.

Without knowing about aspergers in my youth, making different decisions would have been like shuffling the chairs on the deck of the Titanic. It wouldn't have dealt with the problem.

I still managed to avoid worse fates than this, and things would have been better if a couple of the places I worked at hadn't gone out of business.