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Does anyone else enjoy an argument for the mental exercise or is it just me?

As a kid I was a bit of a physical bully, although most of the 'bullying' was to protect other kids or otherwise right a wrong. When I moved from my step-father and mother's place to my father and step-mother's place my father taught me what it was to be on the other end of that. I stopped physically bullying.

I soon learned that I could bully people mentally, quite easily. I wouldn't use direct insults, rather if someone contradicted me I would demonstrate clearly why their view showed how stupid they were in front of other people. Eventually I stopped doing that too, pretty much. It can be a useful skill to have, just as physical fighting can be a good thing to know just as long as you don't use it when it's not absolutely necessary. Another tool in your kit.

There are two ways to win a debate. The first requires either an opponent who lacks critical thinking skills or an audience who lacks same. In such a case the debate can be 'won' by getting people to agree to your point of view without good judgement of the merits of both ideas being presented, without proper analysis of the arguments put forth. This can be accomplished by making the other person seem unworthy of an opinion or unworthy of other people's respect, by outshouting the other person, by using specious argument etc.

These things are irrelevant to winning a debate the second way, which is to demonstrate to the other person how their argument is faulty and to have them voluntarily replace their point of view with one which you have successfully built in their minds through a process of cooperation as opposed to a process of competition. A good debate is an opportunity for the participants to learn from each other, an efficient way to get at the truth of a topic. I definitely enjoy such a conversation. Everyone involved wins. Sometimes a 'difference of opinion' isn't even that, it's a matter of the same idea being expressed in a different way and a productive, cooperative debate will demonstrate this. Sometimes the difference is the result of two people each thinking that a particular word has a different meaning. Again, this is resolved by the second way of winning, but not by the first.

Unfortunately this world contains many people who are loud, disruptive, and who do not respond to reason. When they make the choice to be unresponsive to reason someone will inevitably suffer for it, maybe it's best that they are dealt with in whatever fashion they are vulnerable to.
 
I don't know if I'm on the spectrum or not, so this may not be helpful... but here is how I have/do operate...

When I was young I was considered painfully "shy" and I didn't really speak unless I was told to or otherwise drawn out by something I was really interested in. Truthfully I wasn't "shy" I told people off when I was upset and had no issue actually articulating I just preferred to watch people and figure them out because I found them unpredictable and annoying/worrisome and they seemed to feel similarly about me. this carried on from about the ages of 3 through 12. I got really good at picking up people's insecurities and weakness's both mentally and physically by just watching them while they seemed to forget I was even there.

When I was a teen I used this power for evil instead of good, making many of my sisters friends cry in high school, it was that they could give it(petty inaccurate goading) but not take it(Deep psychological analysis of their life and insecurities), so I started getting into a LOT of trouble for truth telling to 15/16yo's when I was 13/14, but even this wasn't intentional malice I was just better at the game they thought they wanted to play with Andie's weird little sister... It got to the point where I started properly studying personalities, social phycology, body language and the like to find ways to interface with my peers without making them cry so that I wouldn't be grounded from my favorite things (Books,music,headphones,nature hikes,ect).

I'm quite good at human interfacing now, but that ability to what I call "Verbally eviscerate" is still there but I only use it when people are truly horrible or picking on others less equipped to shut them down. I still enjoy a good debate but I tend to keep it as diplomatic as possible because people tend not to like you anymore once you make them cry or destroy a way of thinking that they are emotionally invested in, although this sometimes seems nearly unavoidable.

So I have never really gone out of my way to upset or argue and I prefer a debate that's civil and we agree to disagree but if the other participants can't do that it doesn't really bother me to finish whatever they start, unless they are what I consider "one of my people" a group of about 5 people whom I consider "mine" and I coddle and protect, but if you aren't one of "mine" it's not a great idea to pick a fight with me.
 
I was far too good at this when I was young, out in public or at school. I still do get a thrill from it but I only use it when I have to. Sometimes if people wrong me then I will cut them to the quick by saying things under my breathe that makes them think twice. It depends on the noise, the attitude of the waiter/waitress and the lights in the restaurants, the same applies to anywhere I go. The movie theaters are the worse because generally people don't know how to act 90% of the time.
 
Like ksheehan I don't like arguments. However, I often find myself having aggressive thoughts and sometimes actions.
 
I get drawn in to easily, or used too, very draining, however I now realise it was for their amusement to watch me loose the plot. Argument is not a discussion, discussion is where I learn something new hopefully and I actually enjoy, argument is very draining and embarrassing with anger. If I'm wrong about something, I want to know.
 

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