• Welcome to Autism Forums, a friendly forum to discuss Aspergers Syndrome, Autism, High Functioning Autism and related conditions.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Private Member only forums for more serious discussions that you may wish to not have guests or search engines access to.
    • Your very own blog. Write about anything you like on your own individual blog.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon! Please also check us out @ https://www.twitter.com/aspiescentral

Does anyone else want to be touched all the time?

Misty Avich

Hellooooooooooo!!!
V.I.P Member
When I was a kid at school and we were all sitting on the floor around the teacher, sometimes another girl who sat behind me would make plaits in my long hair, and it was SO relaxing that I'd sit still and not be bored. If the teacher saw he or she would say "don't play with her hair please, it's not a hair salon", but what the teacher didn't know was that by having someone playing with my hair it actually helped me to actually listen to the teacher and concentrate better.

As an adult I love when my husband plays with my hair or massages my back. But he isn't always in the mood (unfortunately lol), so sometimes I smear butter on my back and shoulders and get my pet rats to walk all over my back and lick it off. It's so relaxing.
It this like a sensory seeking thing? I know it's common among autistic people to not want to be touched but is it more common in ADHD people to want to be touched (within reason)?
 
You lost me with the rat thing. I'm laughing, but I get it.

I am constantly wanting to hold hands with my wife, hugging her, cuddling up next to her on the couch or in bed, even if it is just touching her with my legs or feet. I am not a conversationalist, so it's my way of sort of letting her know that I am there and I want to be with her.
 
Not at all

I don't like being touched and I have a very wide personal space circle.

I don't like being randomly touched unless it is with a partner but even there I am not very cuddly nor touchy.
 
Depends on the individual.
For me, I'm not one for being touched unless it's by family (usually my mother) and I'm in the right mood.
 
NO. Not unless it's a lover....and even then getting such attention "all the time" was a bit much.
 
With a loving partner, yes, pretty much exactly as @Neonatal RRT described.

Anyone else in the world - absolutely not. I can march through a crowded train station at high speed and not even accidentally brush someone's sleeve. I'm not particularly fond of women that like to hug instead of shake hands either, how come it's always the ones that wear nylon and too much perfume?
 
Honestly, I am not beyond hugs with people that I care about. But physical interaction with anyone else is... not as comfortable.

Though one thing that is oddly pleasing to me is getting my hair combed. Honestly, I use to actually enjoy the required lice checks in school as a kid. More for being combed for lice. Something about the come softly brushing my scalp and sliding through my hair just puts me into a trance, like a dog getting the back of thier ears scratched. It's just a satisfying feeling.
 
i love touch, but it needs to be a person i trust.
If not, i don't tolerate it, like i sort of get all stiff like rejecting the contact.
 
I hate to be touched by most everyone. That would include rat tongues above hating being touched by people. The only exception to my touch aversion is my wife and to a lesser degree my kids.
 
Honestly, I am not beyond hugs with people that I care about. But physical interaction with anyone else is... not as comfortable.

Though one thing that is oddly pleasing to me is getting my hair combed. Honestly, I use to actually enjoy the required lice checks in school as a kid. More for being combed for lice. Something about the come softly brushing my scalp and sliding through my hair just puts me into a trance, like a dog getting the back of thier ears scratched. It's just a satisfying feeling.
Lol I used to ENJOY getting head lice as a kid. My mum would sit me in front of the TV while she combed through my hair for lice. Pure bliss lol.
 
Most of the time, I don’t like to be touched. I hate it when people invade my personal space. Once, a person I didn’t know or see in a grocery store came up behind me and put her hands on my waist to get by. It was completely innocent, but I was very close to having a public freak-out - the closest I’ve ever been.

To be honest, I don’t even like relatives to hug me. Certain people in my old church used to hug me without asking, and I’d hate it, especially when the tall, creepy elder who only hugged young women would do it. I’d be okay with my mom, a romantic interest/decent partner or my kid.

Other than that, I prefer people to back off.

Yeah, I have PTSD, but so do lots of other people. Not everyone with PTSD is triggered by touch, but many are.
 
Last edited:
shocked-dog.gif


;)
 
Most of the time, I don’t like to be touched. I hate it when people invade my personal space. Once, a person I didn’t know or see in a grocery store came up behind me and put her hands on my waist to get by. It was completely innocent, but I was very close to having a public freak-out - the closest I’ve ever been.

To be honest, I don’t even like relatives to hug me. Certain people in my old church used to hug me without asking, and I’d hate it, especially when the tall, creepy elder who only hugged young women would do it. I’d be okay with my mom, a romantic interest/decent partner or my kid.

Other than that, I prefer people to back off.

Yeah, I have PTSD, but so do lots of other people. Not everyone with PTSD is triggered by touch, but many are.

My aversion to touch is so bad, save for the few people in my life I've mentioned, that touch was a big reason why I hated going to church from childhood onward to eventual liberation: Shaking hands with those around you during the "sign of peace". Hated it. Touching the often clammy hands of strangers then using that same hand to put a wafer in your mouth a few minutes later. May have helped with herd immunity and diseases in the past, but I'll take a hard pass. Yuck.
 
Trust and comfort above all things. If I don't trust or have comfort with you...I don't even shake hands, hug, etc. Fist bumps are the greatest invention of the 21st century, haha.
 
I find being touched is like a electric shock. It's an overload, too much sensation. I have it with loved ones as well, so I have to breathe slowly first before they can approach.
 
There are three types of touch for me,
  1. deliberate, unnecessary touch;
  2. deliberate, necessary touch &
  3. incidental touch.
Spontaneous #1 is always welcome from family and close friends, unless I am carrying something heavy where I might lose my balance. I have that with my ward/daughter and had that with my wife, before her depression. #1 was okay in churches that did that sort of thing, but awkward when a justifiable context is unclear. (If I am no worse for wear, I get over it, though.)

I can tolerate #2 which would include medical or other assistive touch.
And #3, which would include crowd contact or contact sports (in high school).
(The context is clear and appropriate in the last two.)
 
Last edited:
I like deep pressure touch from my very gorgeous boyfriend. Lol he’s dictating but it’s true. Bear hugs and firm pressure are better than light tickly touch which reminds me of bugs or flies on my skin.

I like deep tissue massage and osteopathy too.

As for strangers or friends and family touching me, no way. I don’t hug people and I don’t like random touch. I’d freak out if a stranger put their hands on me unexpectedly. Mind you I have PTSD from assault.
 
Last edited:

New Threads

Top Bottom