Does Aspergers make YOU lazy?

[Sunnylims]

In middle school and high school I got into the habit of taking a nap after school. I was just always super exhausted and usually had a headache by the end of the school day, and a lot of the times had a stomach ache as well. I never knew why I was always so tired, (I wasn't diagnosed until recently), but my father and step-father would make me feel extremely guilty and lazy for it. Once, my father banned me from taking naps, so I took some blankets into the bathroom and made a nice little bed next to the tub. I then told him that I was going to take a bath, so I ran the water for a couple minutes, and tucked myself in. I felt really guilty, but I couldn't help it.

After hitting rock bottom 2 years ago, I began working really hard to get out. I took on two jobs and was working 60+ hours a week, but I completely burned myself out within a year. Being a server at 2 restaurants was a really bad idea. I would have a meltdown almost every shift and I knew my coworkers were beginning to think that I was unstable. Heck, I was starting to think that too because I wasn't aware of my Aspie-ness. Well after realizing that I could not serve anymore, for the sake of my mental health, I got a job washing and drying doggies and it has been a godsend!

Anyway, I live with my boyfriend now after living on my own for the past 2 years. The only reason we moved in together is because it made more financial sense since we were always together anyway. It has been difficult to cohabitate, that's for sure. I have been working on not neglecting chores, and putting my clothes away when I'm done with them, rather than just throw them on the ground which is what I used to do, because my boyfriend is kind of a neat freak.

I also feel like a sucky girlfriend because I never have dinner made for him when he gets home from work (he's a server and works long hours). I have just NEVER had to cook for anyone besides myself, and I eat at weird random times, and I eat the same thing pretty much every day, so yeah there are a lot of things that prevent me from cooking for him, ha. I am still napping almost daily, but I have managed to cut my naps down to a reasonable amount of time.

So basically, I have been brought up to believe that you are lazy if you like to be comfy and take naps and not do 5 million things in a single day. But for the past year I have been trying to change my thinking. It is still kind of difficult to distinguish what is laziness and what isn't, but I try not to worry about it and just do what makes me HAPPY!

 

[Warwick C]

It is the hard thing of pacing your self through out the day, I am starting to learn that too. We can only work so many hours a day, so I am now aiming to make those productive as much as possible. quality over quantity.

 

[anthoskate]

In my case I don't think that I'm lazy I tend to procrastinate and apparently it's very common in aspergers.

Here is a link to see what procrastination is Overcoming Procrastination | Asperger Syndrome Management

 

[Tarragon]

I keep seeing this thread pop up a lot, so it must be striking a chord with everyone. I may not be able to do that well with other people etc, but I am not lazy. Far from it. I just am tuned into other things in my mind, which I am perfectly happy to do rather than get distracted by external things, such as the "real" world of other people(!)

 

[Judge]

When I see such subjects the first thing that pops into my mind are those preconceived notions where some folks connect unemployment with a lack of work ethic. It's patently untrue.

 

[Cyllya]

My ex considered me lazy too. I have ADHD and that seems to be a common problem ADHD people face.

 

[musclecarman]

I'll be honest, my Aspeger's makes me lazy in a way. I did terrible in college because I applied no effort into my classes. I didn't put any effort into my classes because they didn't interest me at all. Hardly cracked open a book and never studied for those 2 years. I can openly say that was me being lazy due to my Asperger's.

But on the upside my Asperger's makes me kick ass at everything that does interest me. I can fix any kind of motor. I can offer endless advice and knowledge on the subject of aquariums. I make an average of $3,000 a year by sport fishing.

So for me my Asperger's makes me super lazy with things that I don't care about, but I can learn anything I want about something I enjoy.

that's the same with me when I am in my math's class I'm really tired but when I do something that I like for example constructing Lego kits I am really focused. that would be the best excuse sorry I didn't do my homework it doesn't interest me.

 

[Cali Cat]

Yep, I think I'm lazy as hell when something doesn't interest me. So is my friend, who I know is ADHD. That's one trait we share, and I think it is pretty common. It takes a great force of effort to maintain concentration on an uninteresting subject or task. This is something that's become more prevalent as I've gotten older. I used to have the will to force myself to do things that didn't interest me for the sake of some greater good, like getting a degree in college. I noticed in my forties that I started having serious trouble doing that anymore. Now, I can barely force my lazy ass to do my job.

 

[Etzelaire]

I wouldn't attach lazyness to aspergers. Maybe it makes it easier for those in the spectrum to abhor (I don't know if that word exists I look it up in the dictionary) the subjects we are not interested in and refuse to waste time with it.

 

[Speedy 246]

I usually don't worry about my autism and a lot of times I tend to forget about it, but at the same time I take medication to cope with that. Since I procrastinate a lot I was prescribed concerta to concentrate and cope better with remedial tasks. But it tends to go downhill very quickly when somebody calls me slow and makes me believe I need to take more meds than prescribed to speed my brain up.

 

[Speedy 246]

Don't think of me as a bad person because of my mind set about meds, but I tend to show my true passion and skills at things when I'm on them, and when they wear off I would just sleep all the time. And I get super lazy when that happens.

 

[Cogs Of My Cranium]

It probably does make me lazy lol. Umm well I think one reason is im looking/waiting for a structured path of activity with real end goals. However I'm beginning to accept that a lot of life and a lot of jobs aren't like this.

 

[Progster]

I tend to procrastinate, or get distracted and forget the time a lot, but that isn't the same as laziness. Laziness is when you don't want to make the effort and prefer to let others do it for you when you have the time and are capable of doing it yourself - it's a kind of exploitation. I don't purposefully exploit others. I often don't do things because I feel very tired or anxious and then can't concentrate, and so retire to my room to wind down. Working makes me feel overloaded and tired because of the interaction involved. People don't understand that this is actually very tiring for me because they enjoy interaction with others and find it relaxing. All these things can seem like laziness to others. Also, I like to listen to music to wind down, and sometimes others think that this is laziness, but I really don't see why. My mum once accused me of being lazy when I lost a job and that upset me a lot.

 

[On the Inside]

By whose point of view?

I keep myself very busy, very rarely have idle time, very seldom sit and watch tv. So I do not consider myself lazy.

However, if you look at my portfolio of accomplishments, it appears rather thin. I will readily admit to not being the most productive bee in the hive, but that doesn't mean that I waste time, serve no purpose, or make no contributions. What I consider important and worthy of my time and effort does not always fit the generally agreed upon list of important endeavors.

 

[On the Inside]

I'm kind of interested a bit in how a lot of people have described being super exhausted all the time. I have always suffered from chronic fatigue. It's interesting to me that I'm not the only aspie here to describe this.

Do the chronic fatigue sufferers have anxiety problems?

I have only recently gotten my out of hand anxiety under control. For years, adrenaline, anxiety and caffeine propelled my activity, and no-one could have considered me lazy during that time. Disorganized, distracted, barking up the wrong trees, certainly but not lazy. I would periodically suffer from fatigue that would lay me low for a few days, but after a little down time I was back at it.

 

[Tigress]

I like to think of it as 'avoidance' rather than lazy..........if I am overwhelmed by life's burdens, then I don't always do everything others think I should be doing. I nap a lot in order to recoup from whatever stress I'm going thru at the moment. Work really stresses me out. I work in retail, which is probably the worst place for an Aspie to work, but the cats have to eat! So I work, I come home and I colapse on the sofa (with a cat), then I get up and do whatever really really has to be done. When I feel good, then I try to get as much done as possible to make up for avoiding stuff at other times.
I think Aspies just get so overwhelmed so often that we have to take a lot of "time outs" just to keep going. Am I making any sense??!!!

Aloha!

I feel like small tasks tend to seem like big chores. I think of life and all the small things and just get very put off by things like owning anything. For me a sense of freedom is the one thing that offers my brain peace. I am lazy with anything that involves getting out of the house. However, in the home I will sit in bed the night before and organize everything that needs to get done in my brain. I will follow that exact organization and I really don't like if it gets interrupted or changed. I do notice that once I start something I will stay up to all sorts of hours to finish. I have OCD and this often times can make me late and cause me a lot of anxiety. It also makes it hard for me to start tasks because I feel I need everything to be done to start.

In terms of work I tend to have a lot of trouble. I start out with a lot of energy and positive attitude but as the different tasks pile up, and I feel I have to adhere to a schedule or lose my job I start to withdraw and eventually get fired. I have a lot of trouble starting but once I do I tend to be pretty fast. It's almost like I need to work one week and not the next. I often just have no interest in anything but what strikes my interest. I try to, I do, but I often just travel into thoughts, scenarios, or movies playing in my brain. With everything I do I try to make it as simple as possible. For instance when I go camping I use hammocks because it's less cleanup and comfortable.If I am going to go downtown I wait until I can do all my errands I don't make multiple trips. I know the other thing about me is I get bored of a task quick if it doesn't spur my interest so my attention span is very short but it can be VERY strong if I am interested.

I would like to say that growing up privileged is what made me "work lazy." However, even as a small child when I wasn't privileged I just marched to the beat of my own drum. I just didn't do what i didn't want to do. Just the other day my boyfriend (he's a naturopath) wanted to take something off the bottom of my food and needed to use a needle. The needle just touched me and I freaked. He told me I had to do it and I said I don't HAVE to do anything and I won't. I told him I am good at ignoring physical pain from day to day, but not stuff like needles. I'd rather just have the pain than do something that feels like torture to me. Sorry I sound dramatic but that is truly what I experience. I can get HYPER sensitive in some instances and hypo sensitive in others.

I often times get upset with myself about being lazy. I sometimes fall into a very negative spiral because I think gosh I'm such a burden. I guess the only compassion I find for myself that being lazy is a survival instinct. It helps us conserve like our ancestors did.

Any input on what I have shared would be very welcome and appreciated.

Mahalo,
Tigress

 

[Abi]

I don't really know if this is actually an Asperger's thing or not, but I constantly get called lazy by my family for not helping out with chores and stuff. The thing is, sometimes things oerwhelm me and I just don't have the energy for it, sometimes there are certain chores I struggle to do because it involves dealing with mouldy things which I have a real phobia of, but most of the time I am able and happy to do chores. The problem is that I just don't "see" what needs to be cleaned like other people seem to do.

I've had people comment on the fact that I seem oblivious to everything going on in the world around me. I've said to my family when they've lectured me about being lazy that they can ask me to do something specific e.g. wash the dishes, clean the cats' litter trays but all I get in response is "but I shouldn't have to, you should notice what needs doing and do it" but I just don't? I don't know what they expect from me to be honest, it frustrates me a lot.

 

[Hollow Horse]

I might say yes for myself but when laziness can exist in all manner of people it could be contradictory to lay the blame at the autism condition.

 

[All-Rounder]

Trauma and depression demotivation links to laziness. When you want to do stuff and feel as you can't.