Executive Function and Spending?

[Catalyst]

I'm very lucky for the father I have. When Social Security canceled my disability payments, my dad helped pay off my credit cards, so long as I promised to cancel them. I kept my promise, and never applied for a credit card after that. Unfortunately, one of them was my Care Credit card, which I used to take my pets to the vet for emergencies. That meant when my cat got sick, I had to pay out of pocket for his care. I'd just gotten backpay from SSI, so I had it, but that meant less to live off of. In the end it was only $300 (yeah I know, only) for the emergency vet visit, atropine (trying to keep his heart going), and sadly he died there so cremation, and the urn. It was my husband's cat too, so he's offered to help pay back some of it if he can get the funds together, but he's living paycheck to paycheck, so I'm not expecting it any time soon. Now, since I gave what little I didn't spend to my dad to manage for me, if something like that happened again, I've got very little money to try and cover such an expense.

I'm trying to save up to fix my car, too. Slow leak of power steering fluid, nothing major, but it'd be nice not to be leaking. Thankfully I can just keep an eye on my fluid levels, and they're not exactly dropping fast.

 

[keebles]

I am horrible with money because my "wants" far outweigh my financial difficulty issues, so I don't mind much as I see it as a necessarily evil to get the "wants". Given a choice between buying a thing here or there and having no debt, or a house full of the things I love that make me happy and total debt, I'll take the debt. Logic has never really been a driving force with me when it comes to financial control, although I do know it should be. I'm trying to work on on it because I want to build a house, which means I have to get the credit cards paid off (or at least down), but it's been slow going. But money is my only real vice, I guess it could be worse.

 

[LucyPurrs]

I am pretty good at managing my money because I hate debt. I don't charge any more than I can pay off in the month and almost always pay bills ahead of when they are due. I went to buy a new car. After they checked my credit I anxiously asked if my credit was good enough. The salesman replied "Lady you could buy this dealership." It turns out my credit score was something like 865- I never knew it could even go that high.

 

[Lula1989]

If anything, I spend too little - I'm really afraid of spending money, hate owing money and worry about having enough money. It really stresses me when I have bills to pay so I pay them straight away to get rid of the stress of knowing I owe money. At the supermarket I'm constantly calculating the best deal or best value for money, I get reduced items near their sell-by-date because they have 30% off, go around turnig lights and devices off the save electricity... it's kind of an obsession. But I also have a thing about buying music albums and CDs or perhaps books, and sometimes buy up to 10 albums at once, because I just have to have them, and then feel guilty... I am contradictory and it makes no sense. But at least I don't owe money.

I am the same exact way. Frugal to the point of obsession, then when I want to spend money, I spend more than I would like to and feel guilty. MY husband has helped me get rid of that guilt and says "If you want it, then just get it. Everything will be fine.. we have already saved XX". So now I obsess over our savings account rather than not spending a dime.

 

[Butterfly88]

I have executive functioning problems in areas such as organization. I don't have trouble managing money though. Occasionally I'll buy something on impulse but I think everyone does, even neurotypicals.

 

[Panthro]

If anything, I spend too little - I'm really afraid of spending money, hate owing money and worry about having enough money. It really stresses me when I have bills to pay so I pay them straight away to get rid of the stress of knowing I owe money. At the supermarket I'm constantly calculating the best deal or best value for money, I get reduced items near their sell-by-date because they have 30% off, go around turnig lights and devices off the save electricity... it's kind of an obsession. But I also have a thing about buying music albums and CDs or perhaps books, and sometimes buy up to 10 albums at once, because I just have to have them, and then feel guilty... I am contradictory and it makes no sense. But at least I don't owe money.

If I didn't know any better, I would have thought that I wrote this, minus the 10 albums thing.

 

[Chance]

Thankfully, I rarely do big purchases unless it's really something I have to have, and even then it has to be under $500. Like, I could never spend $1000 on a drone. Of course, my interest isn't in drones, so I don't know. But my DSLR and lens is a hand-me-down from dad, because I could not spend that kind of money on a camera, but dad had an obsession with photography for a while and kept saving up for newer and "better" cameras and lenses when they went on sale.

My biggest issue is I wind up doing a lot of small purchases. And they're so small, I don't think anything of them, and wind up finding out I've spent like, $50-$100 at a time on these little things.

Your poor drone, though. Deep blue abyss, huh? Lake? River? ... Pool?

Lake... at about a 40mph free fall, totally out of control. It lost all comm (even video) and was supposed to have return home fail safe, but it was out of warranty of course. My best guess is battery went bad, or came loose during flight. That seems to be an issue with those models. They were quietly taken off the market for a while and then suddenly back new and improved... Thank you but no thank you.

 

[Catalyst]

Lake... at about a 40mph free fall, totally out of control. It lost all comm (even video) and was supposed to have return home fail safe, but it was out of warranty of course. My best guess is battery went bad, or came loose during flight. That seems to be an issue with those models. They were quietly taken off the market for a while and then suddenly back new and improved... Thank you but no thank you.

Oh my. I can see why you would be worried about pulling the trigger on another one. I would be devastated.

 

[Misery]

Oh yeah, I cant manage money at all. Not whatsoever. I'm not very good on impulse control, I cant really do math, I'm very disorganized, and so on.

I got lucky though. Really, REALLY lucky. My situation is, well... I'll put it this way, I have no practical spending limit. Note I say "practical". I'm not off making insane purchases like buying some helicopter or whatever. But within the realm of sanity, I can do what I want, when I want. My main hobby is gaming. If I want a new game, I dont even think about the price, just go for it. I buy from Steam, which means extremely frequent purchases. Other hobbies are drones & RC vehicles, and twisty puzzles. Both of which get pricey... but that doesnt matter. I also like conventions & cosplay, and travel alot for those. If I find one within a driving distance that wont make me crazy, I just book the hotel. Dont need to think it through, just do it. 3 nights, every time...

The problem of course is that since I CAN spend, I DO spend. This all becomes very frequent. Well, it doesnt ACTUALLY cause any problems in the traditional sense. My father manages my money (which comes from who knows where) and either A: doesnt notice when I'm spending, or B: doesnt care. On the occaision that I've brought it up with him, he doesnt see the problem with it. He always says things like "I just want you to be happy". Frankly I think he's nuts sometimes.

But still, it is technically not a good habit to have. And if the situation were different, if I wasnt backed by my family? Was truly on my own? It'd be a bloody disaster, particularly since I"m pretty much unsuited to any job.

 

[Gracey]

I used to manage the household like an accountant.

My personal bank account was chaotic.

I could manage well when it involved the responsibility of others but not for myself.

My husband has everything organised at the moment. One less thing for me to worry about.

 

[Judge]

I can't say if my AS had any effect on how I managed money or not. I was raised by a mother whose idea of money management was, "As long as I have checks, I have money." More than once they came to repossess her pick-up truck while she was gone and another time they came to repossess our mobile home. I think the reason they didn't follow through was because I was at home and they didn't want to put me out in the street while she was at work.

With that said, I have taught myself how to manage money and be debt-free. And not wishing to brag, but I have a VERY high FICO score now. I have always kept a slush fund of a certain amount that is never recorded, so I never risk becoming overdrawn. Most financial managers would lose their minds at my system, but it works well for me and my finances are very much under control.

A compelling argument that neither autism or environmental factors necessarily impact or degrade one's executive functioning skills. That the reasoning for the origins of such things may well lie elsewhere.

Being on the spectrum hasn't negatively impacted such skills for me as well, given spending nearly two decades managing corporate assets in the millions, and potential liabilities in the billions of dollars.

 

[Catalyst]

Oh yeah, I cant manage money at all. Not whatsoever. I'm not very good on impulse control, I cant really do math, I'm very disorganized, and so on.

I got lucky though. Really, REALLY lucky. My situation is, well... I'll put it this way, I have no practical spending limit. Note I say "practical". I'm not off making insane purchases like buying some helicopter or whatever. But within the realm of sanity, I can do what I want, when I want. My main hobby is gaming. If I want a new game, I dont even think about the price, just go for it. I buy from Steam, which means extremely frequent purchases. Other hobbies are drones & RC vehicles, and twisty puzzles. Both of which get pricey... but that doesnt matter. I also like conventions & cosplay, and travel alot for those. If I find one within a driving distance that wont make me crazy, I just book the hotel. Dont need to think it through, just do it. 3 nights, every time...

The problem of course is that since I CAN spend, I DO spend. This all becomes very frequent. Well, it doesnt ACTUALLY cause any problems in the traditional sense. My father manages my money (which comes from who knows where) and either A: doesnt notice when I'm spending, or B: doesnt care. On the occaision that I've brought it up with him, he doesnt see the problem with it. He always says things like "I just want you to be happy". Frankly I think he's nuts sometimes.

But still, it is technically not a good habit to have. And if the situation were different, if I wasnt backed by my family? Was truly on my own? It'd be a bloody disaster, particularly since I"m pretty much unsuited to any job.

I love and hate Steam. I love it because I get all my cool games from there (and my husband just bought me a Steam Link and Controller). But every time the words come up in my email "An item from your Steam Wishlist is on sale" I'm browsing everything that's on sale and often buy at least one thing. I've got tons of games I haven't played yet and I'm still buying more. I really just need to delete those emails when they come up.

 

[Crossbreed]

I split my money up into different accounts/funds for different purposes.

• My main account⁰ is used
  • to pay regular monthly bills,
  • to fund the following accounts, and
  • for savings.
• My "larder" account¹ can only be used for food-type purchases.
• My "firewall" account¹ is for
  • internet purchases (including PayPal), and
  • (if unavoidable) authorized billing withdrawals.
• My "catch-all" account¹² is for
  • unexpected expenses, and
  • (if big enough) fun stuff.

(That way I don't misspend money that is set aside for a particular purpose, thinking that I have more than I really do.)

⁰ Bills paid on-line only; no debit card, nor paper checks.
¹ Uses debit card.
² Uses paper checks.

 

[Catalyst]

I split my money up into different accounts/funds for different purposes.

• My main account is used
  • to pay regular monthly bills,
  • to fund the following accounts, and
  • for savings.
• My "larder" account can only be used for food-type purchases.
• My "firewall" account is for
  • internet purchases (including PayPal), and
  • (if unavoidable) authorized billing withdrawals.
• My "catch-all" account is for unexpected expenses and, if big enough, for fun stuff.

(That way I don't misspend money that is set aside for a particular purpose, thinking that I have more than I really do.)

I recently started thinking of doing something like that, though with the bank I'm with, they don't have free checking or savings unless you have a certain amount in the bank, or in the case of my checking, can spend a certain number of times. I think like, 10 times. I'm thinking of moving to a credit union so I can have multiple accounts, just the ones around here don't seem to have as many convenient ATMs around. And with our bank, dad can send me money without having a joint account. There is a credit union with a bank close to my house, so if I do switch, it'll probably be that one. Then the plan is to have a savings account for emergencies and saving up to buy something bigger, one for bills and gas, and one for my spending habit. Though I like the idea of one for food purchases, so I might consider that.

 

[kay]

I am trying to do better than last year now that things are starting to get back to normal. What I have learned in the last few days is the miracle of clothes pins and two sided tape. Rather than keep important papers for banking and insurance in folders I have them in clothes pins taped to the wall of my closet (not a clothes closet, my "office" closet). Having them in site has somehow has made it feel less overwhelming. I'm a visual person who rather loathes tech stuff and I seem to found, finally, a way to get better organized. My ledger is now attached to a string and clipped to an on the wall three compartment folder holder for things that don't work in a clothes pin. I am going to try to still put a clothes pin on them, color coded and labeled in plain site. I'll use my regular files for "historic" documents like old taxes and medical records. @Catalyst , thanks for posting about this subject, some of the responses are going to hopefully help me out this year and it makes me feel less overwhelmed reading others experiences.

 

[WildCat]

I have little problem at all managing and prioritizing my money now, except maybe during the holidays and impulse decisions on hobbies and other things, though I'm sure a lot of people get those urges from time to time. Not that things are always running smooth and there's a lot more to be learned (savings for one), but I'm a lot better now then I was before.

 

[Crossbreed]

Then the plan is to have a savings account for emergencies and saving up to buy something bigger, one for bills and gas, and one for my spending habit.

My main one is for regular/monthly bills, but since I completely redistribute my regular income from there, it does double-duty as a savings account.

Regular savings accounts restrict the number of transactions you can do. If you aren't counting on interest, a checking-as-savings account is more flexible.

 

[Catalyst]

My main one is for regular/monthly bills, but since I completely redistribute my regular income from there, it does double-duty as a savings account.

Regular savings accounts restrict the number of transactions you can do. If you aren't counting on interest, a checking-as-savings account is more flexible.

Hmm... That's true. I think my savings account is limited to 6 withdrawals. But it's mostly for emergency cash, so it doesn't need many transactions. Though, having a checking account to save for something bigger or to give myself an allowance into another account is an idea.

 

[HappyHermit]

I don't have problems managing money, personally. That's not necessarily due to being inherently great at managing things in general or finances in particular. It's just that I was always kept short growing up (I had my own earnings confiscated by my parents before I turned 18) and didn't get assistance, financial or otherwise, from my parents for anything after high school.

I keep spreadsheets for my bank accounts (current and savings), my partner's accounts and joint accounts with details of all recurring incoming and outgoing payments, other purchases and incidentals. I monitor our credit cards and global credit lines closely to make sure they're either paid off monthly or within a reasonable time-frame.

We're not rich, and sometimes we wouldn't be able to finance something like an additional qualification or necessary renovations without short-term credit. I'm not against using credit lines, but it's something that needs to be monitored to be kept in check, always with the aim of paying things off relatively soon.

Until about a year or two ago, I checked everything multiple times a week, which got to be a bit much. Doing that can be useful when literally every cent matters. Now that things are a little more relaxed, once a week to every ten days is enough. These days I don't always know off the top of my head what we have and what we owe down to the cent, but I do know to within +/- 10 euros, which is currently good enough.

I tried personal finance software, but - apart from the fact that that costs too - I ultimately found it unnecessarily complicated for our situation. So I stuck with spreadsheets, which I find extremely useful and would be stressed without.

 

[Crossbreed]

I split my money up into different accounts/funds for different purposes.

Two other special accounts that we maintain:

• "Gasoline" account¹,* and
• "Supply" account¹,** for
  • cleaning agents &
  • toiletries.

¹ Uses debit card.
*For normal gas allowance. Special trips are funded by the "catch-all" account.
**My wife prefers to manage this fund as cash.