Flapping my hands

[Neia]

For the first time, since I was very little, I flapped my hands, and it felt good.

I was trying to calm down. These are the last few days before the move, and my stress is stressing me out.
I was feeling like my whole body could explode, and did what I usually do, I clasped my hands together. I was thinking that all I wanted to do was shake all of that tension out.

Then it dawned on me... why not? There's no one else around to butt in, to ask me if I'm OK and make me withdraw.

So I started flapping my hands, with my eyes closed and just allowing myself to feel my hands.

I think I've rediscovered another stim.

I have a very vague memory of little Neia flapping her little hands. My mom used to tell me that when she fed me foods like tomatoes, which I still love, I'd flap my hands with excitement and do a sort of dance in my highchair.

 

[Tired]

Can someone show how this hand-flapping actually looks on a video? I'm not sure I understand it.

And heh you sound like an adorable kid

 

[Neia]

Can someone show how this hand-flapping actually looks on a video? I'm not sure I understand it.

And heh you sound like an adorable kid

For me it looks like this:

 

[Tired]

For me it looks like this:

so NT kids don't do this then?

 

[Neia]

so NT kids don't do this then?

I think they might do, but probably not to the same degree, not so prominently.

For me, most of my stims are "quiet" ones, unobtrusive.
If my fingers wiggling bothered someone, I started wiggling my toes, nobody noticed my toes wiggling inside the shoes.
If tapping my fingers on a desk or similar surface bothered others, I'd tap them against the palm of my hand.
Pacing bothered people, so I started quietly moving my feet in place, "pacing" in place. Although, I still get annoyed stares for this from some people. But I only notice their annoyed stares sometimes, not all the time because I space out a lot when forced to wait on a line or in a waiting room, so

But today, I realised that I no longer need to do that when I'm home. I live alone now, so I can stim all I need, and as I need! And if that means flapping my hands, I'll do it!
There's nobody around to tell me off about wiggling too much, or humming, or tapping my foot, etc. and that etc. includes flapping my hands!

 

[Tired]

I think they might do, but probably not to the same degree, not so prominently.

For me, most of my stims are "quiet" ones, unobtrusive.
If my fingers wiggling bothered someone, I started wiggling my toes, nobody noticed my toes wiggling inside the shoes.
If tapping my fingers on a desk or similar surface bothered others, I'd tap them against the palm of my hand.
Pacing bothered people, so I started quietly moving my feet in place, "pacing" in place. Although, I still get annoyed stares for this from some people. But I only notice their annoyed stares sometimes, not all the time because I space out a lot when forced to wait on a line or in a waiting room, so

But today, I realised that I no longer need to do that when I'm home. I live alone now, so I can stim all I need, and as I need! And if that means flapping my hands, I'll do it!
There's nobody around to tell me off about wiggling too much, or humming, or tapping my foot, etc. and that etc. includes flapping my hands!

wow those people around you need to chill and mind their own business! annoying. glad to hear that you have your own space where you can be yourself

 

[AuroraBorealis]

I'm glad to hear that you've rediscovered a way of stimming that feels good, and that you're confident to explore it!

I also sort of (re?)discovered hand flapping. It seems to be something I do when I'm stressed and overwhelmed, or happy and excited. I only do it for a few seconds, but that happens automatically.

For example, I did it today while in a shop with my parents, because they wanted me to choose something for my birthday, and I was a bit overwhelmed with the task.

Very interesting to discover new ways of stimming. I can't remember whether I used to do it as a child at some point.

 

[Neia]

I'm glad to hear that you've rediscovered a way of stimming that feels good, and that you're confident to explore it!

I also sort of (re?)discovered hand flapping. It seems to be something I do when I'm stressed and overwhelmed, or happy and excited. I only do it for a few seconds, but that happens automatically.

For example, I did it today while in a shop with my parents, because they wanted me to choose something for my birthday, and I was a bit overwhelmed with the task.

Very interesting to discover new ways of stimming. I can't remember whether I used to do it as a child at some point.

I have a photo of when I was about 1, I have a cookie in one hand and the other one is up. I always looked at it and knew I was flapping my free hand. I don't exactly remember doing it, but when I looked at that photo, I always knew that that hand wasn't stil.
That is my faint memory of it.

And my mom used to tell me how I always flapped both hands when eating foods I wasn't allowed to hold myself, like tomatoes and mangoes. Apparently I got really excited when she prepared those for me

 

[Mary Terry]

so NT kids don't do this then?

NT kids do it when they are excited or upset but they outgrow it. Some autistic children continue doing it in adulthood, sometimes for the rest of their lives. My 33-year-old nephew still flaps his hands and rapidly draws the figure 8 with his right-hand index finger as a stim.

 

[Tired]

NT kids do it when they are excited or upset but they outgrow it. Some autistic children continue doing it in adulthood, sometimes for the rest of their lives. My 33-year-old nephew still flaps his hands and rapidly draws the figure 8 with his right-hand index finger as a stim.

Thanks for the info. I remembered that on one video of me being maybe 4 I was flapping hands, so that's where the question came from.

 

[jsilver256]

My ASD2 kid and I both flap hands. I do it much more often than him though. It just started about 3-4 months after quitting drinking. I read that the part of brain involved in sensory processing is suppressed/damaged by alcoholism aso I assumed it was part of the healing process.

 

[Misty Avich]

so NT kids don't do this then?

I've seen NT kids do this. I used to volunteer in a preschool for children age 2-5, and hand-flapping wasn't unusual (and I very much assume the children didn't just all happen to be Aspies). Small children can flap when excited or worried or even during a tantrum. It's cute.

 

[Kayla55]

wow those people around you need to chill and mind their own business! annoying. glad to hear that you have your own space where you can be yourself

We who have autism seem to notice quirks in others less, or even though understand why something is wrong we may take longer to understand why it's not kosher. Gee, son go wash your hands, why? Um.....cause you took out garbage, oh.
I thought all kids hit other kids, it was why play alone at that age and that still developing social skills. Um, nope all those things I noticed were signs that none of us in house are neuro typical.

 

[Aspie_With_Attitude]

I had almost six years ago made a YouTube video explaining why do a number of autistic individuals flap theirs hands while they speak.

 

[Cutesie]

For some years now, I've been flapping my hands and twisting my fingers when upset or happy. It seems to be happening half-naturally, I guess. I realize that I'm doing it in the first second of the action, but am not sure how aware I was that it was starting. There is definitely a component of letting myself be autistic or trying to convince myself that I am. (I'm self-diagnosed.)

My autistic brother Ikey does stimming way less than he used to now that he's an adult. Watching him today, the flapping appeared to be more natural and less intentional than mine.