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Give your younger self some advice

The below is advice not necessarily that I wish I could have taken or acted upon when younger, as I did the best I could daily under those circumstances, and could not have changed a thing.

So, the suggestions below would be one day given to our children for them to consider, if not already talked about to our oldest son for a few of those items. Of course explanation using real life examples and logic is often needed to make things clearer, and we may have to help them build certain skills, but in the end they will do as they can, need or desire.

One day they will make all their own decisions in life, and then we will need to back further away, and to be mainly there as a friend to support, or give advice if asked. So, if they cannot follow our advice due to condition, or do not want to follow any of the below suggestions, we will love them the same. At least we will have tried to point them in a direction that was meant to try to help.

So the advice, if possible to achieve, but realizing each may have their own rules, desires and unique needs that makes them more content or happier, would be:

Take responsibility for your own actions.

Live within your means.

Treat others nicely and with fairness, like you may want to be treated yourself.

Being yourself means it's ok to grow or change, when times and situations warrant that.

Stand up for what you believe in.

Do not let others and events define you or determine your fate, happiness or future.

When any obstacle occurs, find another path if need be. Few things in life always goes as planned.

Understand what you see and hear is not necessarily the truth. It's ok to question things, and to want to look beneath the surface. Although many people have good intentions and believe in honesty, many others do not.

Focus often on your efforts, more so than the results.

See learning as fun: Try to learn something new in almost everything you do.

There are exceptions to the rules: Rules are sometimes meant to be broken, if special circumstances warrant that.

Focus often on quality and not quantity in life. More does not often mean better.

Try to enjoy each and every day: Find something good to focus on daily, to carry you through any tougher times.

Giving can have just as many rewards as receiving, if one has the right attitude or selfless personality in life.

Love yourself, then more others may love you.

Take things step by step. Life is not a race.

Although actions often speak louder than words, a few "sincerely meant" words like thank you, I'm sorry, please, and I love you often speak louder than that.
 
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I'd tell myself (even younger than I figured it out, if I could hear it sooner), "The Law of Diminishing Returns trumps 'perfectionism'."
 
Don't go on forums and stay withdrawn as possible. You'll feel much better for it.
 
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Wait till more mature to marry. Learn about relationships first. Find a compatable person and don’t divorce. Save more money or go into a good business you have passion for and invest not in stock but assets that can be sold for a better profit like rental properties or flip businesses, sell franchises you invented.
 
Wait till more mature to marry. Learn about relationships first. Find a compatable person and don’t divorce. Save more money or go into a good business you have passion for and invest not in stock but assets that can be sold for a better profit like rental properties or flip businesses, sell franchises you invented.
And.... teach wisdom of good life choices to your children early, like how to figure people out, EQ, lay groundwork for their success. I was a bit clueless.
 
Dear younger me:

Nope, your face really won’t stick like that if the wind changes.

Don’t duck, catch the board rubber the teacher’s just thrown at you and start a collection.

Don’t stress, where you’re headed you really won’t use algebra.

Trust your guts, that Locum really is a sick old man and no, you’re absolutely correct, he really shouldn’t be doing that.

One persons opinion isn’t fact.

If you want to earn a living doing that then you just jolly well go ahead and do it. Take no prisoners.
 
Dear younger me,

There are people in your life who will tell you that you are worthless, don't listen to them. You might not fully realise it at the moment, but they are just projecting their own insecurities. However, although it may be tempting to base all of your motivations for success on proving them wrong, please don't. Otherwise you'll find yourself in a situation where your life has moved on but you haven't, and you'll struggle to find internal motivation because the only thing that was pushing you forward was a insatiable need to prove your own worth, and they won't be in your life forever.
 
If I'd known what I do now in October 1999 when I was first diagnosed, I wouldn't have commented on Asperger's on various websites, and then some idiot from a wrestling forum wouldn't Google me and find out I'm Aspie and proceed to tell the world, without my permission... Hence my long running disdain for online inter-action with North Americans.
 
Apple stocks and Bitcoin....

That 69 Karmann Ghia coupe towed fresh out of someone's mouse infested barn you just had to have will spend 95% of it's time sucking up all you're sanity and time, go for the 72 convertible that was parked next to it, you'll learn to like the color.

Bring a rain poncho to the Styx concert, you're going to need it.

The road trip to Cleveland is just a really bad idea, you don't want to see Cleveland, trust me.

...and that guy at the New Year's Eve party when you hit 22?? Just go home early and watch Dick Clark drop the ball in Times Square on TV. Seriously, just go home girl, he's got baggage...a full matching set with a carry on bag.
 
Drink more water, and less energy drinks, especially in hot and dry climates, because when you're 25 you WILL get kidney stones, and they will be the worst pain you've ever experienced.

There is no such thing as good debt.

Business majors are worthless without connections, get a Computer Science degree, learn actual skills, build networks, then get promoted into management.

High school me, you need to be able to recognize a good thing when you have it.
High school me, wear a f**kin condom, you're lucky you aren't a father, and you don't have an STD.
High school me, never date that one girl from Australia; she may be hot, but she's a bogan, and you don't want to know what that means.

Don't worry about not having a degree in your early 20's, you ended up getting tons of life experience, and you have a much better idea of where you want to go career-wise. Being in your 30's and getting two bachelor's degrees in math and engineering has huge benefits, and you end up avoiding a lot of bull***t.

The American Dream < Your Dream. Don't feel pressured to live up to the expectations of a culture, feel comfortable doing your own thing.

________________
I've got a lot more but I really need to study.
 
Not having any kids, but hypothetically:
1. Some people can actually be trusted.
2. Do not believe the lies big corporations try to tell you about your body or your gender or anything else. They are just trying to make money. You are good the way you are.
3. You do not have to do what everyone else is doing. It's ok to be different.
4. Treat others as you would want to be treated, including animals.
5. Be aware that others may have less money/opportunities/chances than you have or had in your life.
 
If you get offered a work experience placement at Just Seventeen, take it, even if you're not contemplating a career in journalism. Regardless of your future career path, you could learn some useful life skills at the office of the country's leading teenage magazine.

Likewise, if your parents' friend offers you a shadow placement in his maritime law firm, do it, even if it's unpaid.

(Both these things were actually offered to me and I turned them down - more fool me.)
 
Don’t do drugs or drink alcohol in a misguided attempt to fit in with the wrong crowd, just because you’re ostracised from the ‘right crowd’
 

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