guilt for stimming

[Streetwise]

Yes I think so my mam(mom) said I was a nervous baby so my perception seems to be through panic\anxiety which doesn't make you intelligent

 

[Streetwise]

I think so. Conscious - knowing, aware. Unconscious - unknowing, unaware. Does that help?

I think if you answered yes or no and a very simple worded explanation of why no, why my mother got a degree in English literature ,then became a solicitor and I can't comprehend English is strange!

 

[Storm Hess]

when i think of or see people or things that make me happy, or listen to music i enjoy, i often flap my hands, shake my fists in front of my chest, or rock back and forth. when i'm upset or overwhelmed i often do those things too, as i find that they help. i also meow sometimes, for no real reason except that i like to do so.
but when i do these things i feel guilty. i feel embarrassed for flapping my hands when i think of my best friend. i feel silly for rocking back and forth when i'm arguing with my parents and i feel upset. i feel like i'm not supposed to do these things, that they're wrong of me, and i feel ashamed. i don't always feel this way. sometimes i'm okay with it. sometimes i don't criticize myself for stimming because frankly, it's not like it's a big deal. i'm not hurting anyone, and stimming is something that i enjoy. but other times i feel ashamed of myself, even though i know logically that it's a perfectly okay thing to do

My parents use to shame and hit me for doing so. "Stop that! People are going to think something's wrong with you." It's been very difficult to deal with wanting to 'stim' and feel comfortable doing so. Still dealing with it, but becoming more comfortable with displaying my 'stims'.

 

[Judge]

My parents use to shame and hit me for doing so. "Stop that! People are going to think something's wrong with you." It's been very difficult to deal with wanting to 'stim' and feel comfortable doing so. Still dealing with it, but becoming more comfortable with displaying my 'stims'.

As a kid when I'd stand in front of the tv set and sway back and forth, my mother would sometimes grab my hips. Not saying anything, but I knew it seemed to bother her. As the years went by, eventually she didn't bother. It's something I still do to this very day, but mostly in the privacy of my own living room.

I once had a girlfriend who would grab my hips and stand next to me swaying back and forth, though at the time neither of us knew why I routinely did this. I miss her.

 

[Stuttermabolur]

When I was a kid, I used to make a clipping noise by quickly moving my tongue from the roof of my mouth. This really annoyed my father at the time so he told me to stop doing it (to be fair to him, I can totally see why). I explained that it was unconscious, but he said that it can't by definition be unconscious as the tongue is a skeletal muscle which needs to be moved by conscious thought. I did eventually take an active action on stopping it when I noticed I was doing it and haven't done it in years now. I tried it again just now, and it's actually pretty fun.

 

[Aspie_With_Attitude]

Why fell guilty stimming? Here's my video fully explaining why most of us stim, the benefit of stimming and why we need to do it.

 

[Darkkin]

I have a balance ball I bounce the snot out of. Wear slides so I have easy access to crack my toes by bouncing them on the floor. And do air percussion to music. I also work on my puzzle fables.

 

[Soleil]

When I was little, I got made fun of for looking different. This also made me very self-conscious of my behavior. I can't recall any specific examples clearly, but I definitely remember the feeling of "oh, I don't think this is normal". Like the way I would sit when I was alone and not thinking of other people, suddenly I'd realise what I'm doing and think about how it looked, which would really highlight the idea of "why am I so different?" It can really highlight that sense that I'm different.

 

[Nervous Rex]

When I was little, I got made fun of for looking different. This also made me very self-conscious of my behavior. I can't recall any specific examples clearly, but I definitely remember the feeling of "oh, I don't think this is normal". Like the way I would sit when I was alone and not thinking of other people, suddenly I'd realise what I'm doing and think about how it looked, which would really highlight the idea of "why am I so different?" It can really highlight that sense that I'm different.

So, I really want someone to study the cause-and-effect of anxiety in autistic people. Is it inherent and genetic, or does it develop from life experience?

I really think that life experience is a major contributor.

I think that a life full of experiences like yours - being judged, shamed, or ridiculed for being different - contributes to the anxiety. It leads us to constantly comparing ourselves to others to make sure we fit in. That masking adds an extra mental and emotional toll that NTs don't normally experience. I also think it leads us to give more attention and weight to negative feedback, which also contributes to anxiety.

 

[Lucyd]

im working on not not stimming publicly. ive been shamed for doing it, i used to do things like rocking and walking on my tippy toes, but people actively stopped me from doing what they deemed abnormal and now im a burned out frazzled mess. its my mission this year (call it a new years resolution if you must) to stim like there is no tomorrow, ferk it!