CritterCalico
New Member
Hi I found this forum like idk..20 minutes ago, but it's something I've honestly needed. I was diagnosed at 14 and am currently 22. My whole life ive been really passionate about art, music, and animals (also hyperfixations lol). It's hard for me to navigate the world and understand my autistic self when you're forced to see it through the perspective of people who don't function the same way you do. It's hard to find and keep a job when employers are apathetic to your needs but I'm so happy to have a job coach to help me when I find one 
I'm trying to navigate a life where I have to figure myself out while hiding my true self for the comfort of others, but I'm sure this forum will help me with the journey :3
I love having autism in the sense of what it makes me, I'm very happy with who I am, but it's hard to not have a strong inferiority complex (a goal I have is to help alleviate it) when you're told you're wrong for simply showing autistic traits that aren't harmful and just make people mildly uncomfortable like not making eye contact the whole time.
Also idk where to fit this but I have hyperfixations that last a varying amounts of time, but my most recent one saved me during my extremely abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. Looking at fan art and watching the show (better call Saul) or just generally engaging with the content while i drew/talked/ect about Saul helped me through it and still is after. It was a huge coping mechanism for me even throughout my frequent PTSD after the relationship. Just my pure passion for a character trumping the fear of my ex and I finally left him because he made the fatal mistake of literally trying to shame my hyperfixation out of me out of jealousy. He delusionally made it up in his head that I was cheating on him with the actor and knew it made me happy so he tried taking it away, but I persisted. I love having autism and I just hope I can better understand myself and others, thank you for reading even if it was a strange read. :3
I'm trying to navigate a life where I have to figure myself out while hiding my true self for the comfort of others, but I'm sure this forum will help me with the journey :3 I love having autism in the sense of what it makes me, I'm very happy with who I am, but it's hard to not have a strong inferiority complex (a goal I have is to help alleviate it) when you're told you're wrong for simply showing autistic traits that aren't harmful and just make people mildly uncomfortable like not making eye contact the whole time.
Also idk where to fit this but I have hyperfixations that last a varying amounts of time, but my most recent one saved me during my extremely abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. Looking at fan art and watching the show (better call Saul) or just generally engaging with the content while i drew/talked/ect about Saul helped me through it and still is after. It was a huge coping mechanism for me even throughout my frequent PTSD after the relationship. Just my pure passion for a character trumping the fear of my ex and I finally left him because he made the fatal mistake of literally trying to shame my hyperfixation out of me out of jealousy. He delusionally made it up in his head that I was cheating on him with the actor and knew it made me happy so he tried taking it away, but I persisted. I love having autism and I just hope I can better understand myself and others, thank you for reading even if it was a strange read. :3
