Happy to be here :-)

[Alexej]

.. I am here to meet other mothers of autistic children and to meet people on the spectrum so I can maybe better understand my son.

Welcome @Vicki Gail. This is a good place to come with your questions. You might try doing some searching in the Forums and see what you come up with. The search engine is quite good.

 

[texkag]

I've been here a couple of weeks but haven't done an introduction yet...still trying to find my way around. My name is Vicki and I am the mother of three "kids"...not so much kids anymore and I live in Louisiana. I have a 30 year old son in Colorado, a 27 year old daughter an hour from me who has our only grandchild, a 21 year old daughter in college and then there's Landon. Landon is 17 and was diagnosed with Aspergers, ADHD and OCD when he was six. I have been homeschooling him since first grade...we do online public school and it's been a Godsend for me. I am here to meet other mothers of autistic children and to meet people on the spectrum so I can maybe better understand my son. I'm very happy to be here.

Hi Vicky. Welcome to the forum.

 

[WildCat]

Welcome to the forums!

 

[Vicki Gail]

Hi Vicki, welcome to the forums I hope you find all the support and help you need here. It really is a wonderful place and there's so many helpful and supportive members here.

Your family sounds wonderful and I can see how proud you are of them all. I want to be a mum one day as well.

Best wishes,
Sky.

Thank you Sky. Being a mom is all I ever wanted and was blessed to get to do it four times There has been nothing in my life more rewarding than being a mom. It hasn't been all easy for sure but the good far outweighs the bad.

 

[Vicki Gail]

Hi Vicki it's wonderful to hear and sence your love and understanding to ypur son, my Autism wasn't 'seen' till much later in life and when i realised, professionals were still unsupported and i paid privately for my diagnosis, i believe the home schooling was a positive decision, my experience of education left me feeling isolated and stupid, constantly being compared to more obviously academic siblings and anxious due to social expectations, welcome to the forum.

I had to take him out of school to preserve his self-esteem along with needing to make sure he learned. Even in first grade he was already being treated so bad and not just by the other kids...the teachers were mistreating him. Even years later it makes me so mad to think of how they treated him. Landon will every now and then say he must be stupid and I just say and do all I can to try to get him to believe that he is not stupid and is in fact smarter than most in a lot of ways. I know homeschooling causes him to feel lonely and probably isolated at times and I hate that but compared to what the bullying would have done to him this is the lesser of the two evils. Before the pandemic and quarantine I had started taking him once a week to a social group at the autism center an hour from where we live but that all shut down and hasn't started back up yet. Also, for a time he was going to youth group at church but after being made fun of consistently by another child he no longer wants to go back. It's pretty sad when even Church can't be a safe place for him. Thank you so much for the welcome!!

 

[Magna]

Welcome, Vicki! You picked a great autism related forum to join. I am both like your son and like you: I have a son who is autistic as am I. My son is about six years younger than your son. There are five of us in our family with 3 being neurotypical and two of us being autistic.

 

[SkyForever]

Thank you Sky. Being a mom is all I ever wanted and was blessed to get to do it four times There has been nothing in my life more rewarding than being a mom. It hasn't been all easy for sure but the good far outweighs the bad.

I'm so happy for you Vicki You sound like such a kind and loving mum to your children and they must be so proud to have you as their mum. Sounds like you're doing awesome at parenting.

Its always been one of my dreams as well but sadly one I think will remain just a dream. But never say never so I won't give up.

 

[Vicki Gail]

@Vicki Gail I am on the spectrum and I am sure my mother was. Unfortunately she passed about six months before my official diagnosis so It's just a personal hypothesis.

Hey Ken...how old were you when you were diagnosed? Since she likely was also on the spectrum did she seem to understand you more than other people? My son also has OCD (truly has it, not the losely thrown around "I'm so OCD" people say all the time) and I also have a diagnosis of it so that is one area that I truly understand what he is going through and have been able to help him cope with it. I remember being a kid with OCD and wondering what was wrong with me...I never want that for him. I'm sorry you lost your mother. I lost my mother when my twin sister and I were 14.

 

[Vicki Gail]

Welcome, Vicki! You picked a great autism related forum to join. I am both like your son and like you: I have a son who is autistic as am I. My son is about six years younger than your son. There are five of us in our family with 3 being neurotypical and two of us being autistic.

Hi Magna When were you diagnosed? Are your other children older or younger than your son and how is his relationship with them? It's sad but Landon isn't really close to any of his siblings...I wish my oldest son lived closer so maybe they could be closer. There are 13 years between them so they have never been close.

 

[Ken S.]

@Vicki Gail I was officially diagnosed at the age of 54 just a little over four years ago. My mother was the only blood relative I had/have that even cared about me or understood me or my problems that nobody else saw or if they saw them they were indifferent. I no longer have any contact with any of them. i don't look at it as a bad thing, would rather it be that way than them being fake nice like they were when she was still around.

 

[Magna]

Hi Magna When were you diagnosed? Are your other children older or younger than your son and how is his relationship with them? It's sad but Landon isn't really close to any of his siblings...I wish my oldest son lived closer so maybe they could be closer. There are 13 years between them so they have never been close.

Hi Vicki:

I was diagnosed at 48. It was the missing piece of the puzzle of my life that made so much of it make sense when I received my diagnosis.

Our kids are fairly close in age and still at home. He's the youngest. They get along most of the time. Things can be emotionally explosive and he can certainly have meltdowns. Parenting is both challenging and rewarding for any parent. Being an autistic parent comes with its own set of challenges. I'm blessed that my NT wife is there with me and we work as a team.

 

[Spiritfilled]

Hi Vicki! im new here too my 5 year old daughter was diagnosed recently and I’m going for my adult assessment next week! All the research about it made me realise I’m probably ASD too. I’m finding the parenting thing hard, it’s very challenging for us, dd doesn’t sleep much. Sending love from Ireland

 

[Magna]

Hi Vicki! im new here too my 5 year old daughter was diagnosed recently and I’m going for my adult assessment next week! All the research about it made me realise I’m probably ASD too. I’m finding the parenting thing hard, it’s very challenging for us, dd doesn’t sleep much. Sending love from Ireland

Welcome, Spiritfilled.

 

[Spiritfilled]

Welcome, Spiritfilled.

Thanks!

 

[HDLSeanWiley]

I think you should really consider reading this given your child's diagnosis and your own possible diagnosis: https://autisticadvocacy.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/WTTAC-Adult-FINAL-2.pdf