Hello everyone

[Selectivemute122]

I've recently been diagnosed with Aspergers and selective mutism. At school I only speak when a teacher calls on me, I think for most people this would be a difficulty but I have got a lot of friends being the kid who doesn't speak. I like to write notes on paper or on my phone to show my friends but I never verbally communicated with them. On the negative side this behavior really hides my social flaws and it makes change seem less desirable for me.

 

[MoCoffee]

Welcome to aspiescentral! You must have some amazing friends, and I'm guessing you are pretty special too. I'm glad you've joined us and I look forward to hearing more from you.

 

[Ereth]

Hello! Make yourself at home.

 

[Selectivemute122]

You sure will, I will have many questions and ideas that I will post in other areas of the forum. This was a faster response than most forums I've joined.

 

[Vanilla]

Welcome

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? My sister was the same as a kid, she didn't speak when in crowds, around strangers, or when she didn't like someone. She would only really speak to those closest to her, and if others were around, shed either whisper it in their ear, or remain silent, looking at them as though she'd wish they'd leave the room. She grew out of it when she started highschool though; now she's loud and proud, ironically.

 

[Selectivemute122]

Welcome

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? My sister was the same as a kid, she didn't speak when in crowds, around strangers, or when she didn't like someone. She would only really speak to those closest to her, and if others were around, shed either whisper it in their ear, or remain silent, looking at them as though she'd wish they'd leave the room. She grew out of it when she started highschool though; now she's loud and proud, ironically.

I am 15, I consider myself introverted and I normally don't say anything when I don't see anything worth saying in a situation even when I'm comfortable. For that reason I don't see myself turning into a loud talkative person (it's draining when comfortable, scary when I'm not uncomfortable). My family always just thought I was shy and had difficulty expressing emotions, both are true, but they didn't know I flat out didn't talk at school unless I was called on. My friends used to ask me "why don't you talk, did you take an oath of silence, are you 'just' shy?" All of these questions annoyed me and I could do nothing about it other than give them a really unpleasant stare with my dead eyes.

 

[Selectivemute122]

Selective Mutes who recover or who (comfortable) are home are usually loud and energetic like most kids. That isn't really the case for me though.

 

[Warwick C]

Welcome to aspie cental Selectivemute. Do you have differculty in putting thoughts into words, I know I do. It might also be the way you think as well. As an example I am a visual thinker so it is an extra process I have to go through in putting thoughts into words (Spoken or written).

 

[LoneHeart]

Hello Selectivemute22! I was the same exact way as you when I was your age, about 90% of the kids at my school thought I was mute because in 4 years of going to school they had never heard me speak before. I only spoke to my closest friends and teachers only. I did improve over time though in terms of being more talkative. I eventually got myself to the point where I could get myself out there enough socially to make friends/acquaintances, but still maintain my quiet nature which makes me mysterious and intriguing to people.

 

[Turk]

Hi selective,
Well you picked a good place to come and write. If even knew it was possible to retain friendships, in that way, I would of used this method ages ago. My mouth is always getting me in trouble. Have to admit, although I speak well, I find writing a more powerful and descriptive way of communication. Welcome aboard.

Cheers
Turk

 

[Selectivemute122]

I tend to work out certain problems visually, like moon phases I can just imagine the sun and the moon revolving. I have difficulty putting words into a vocabulary others understand, I tend to be slightly verbose, so I stop to think of a big word so I don't screw it up, it's a little slower than natural speaking. I also have to break down words I prefer into simpler words that don't come comfortably natrually to other people. I do prefer writing a lot because I can get everything said at once and without interruption. It sometimes leads to a funny scenario: when working in groups someone asks for my opinion and I start writing a 5 star work of literature to answer the question and it takes a few minutes, ah such fun.

 

[Selectivemute122]

I also have the tendecy to rip books out of people's hands to write to them. I quietly break little rules and no one ever notices. I'm not at all mean, despite my lack of concern for property rights.

 

[Turk]

I also have the tendecy to rip books out of people's hands to write to them. I quietly break little rules and no one ever notices. I'm not at all mean, despite my lack of concern for property rights.

Quirks like interupting and speaking over someone, can be an Aspergers trait. .If writing is your method of communication, that behavior is totally understandable.The impatience of wanting to speak just comes in the form of snatching the media, that gives you voice. Whose it is, would be irrelevant.


Cheers
Turk

 

[Selectivemute122]

Quirks like interupting and speaking over someone, can be an Aspergers trait. .If writing is your method of communication, that behavior is totally understandable.The impatience of wanting to speak just comes in the form of snatching the media, that gives you voice. Whose it is, would be irrelevant.


Cheers
Turk

What about just jumping into work without any prior thought? There may be a specific "way" of doing certain things that I ignore either because I don't know or I just go by what seems right to me.

 

[Turk]

For me, I find the right way to be open to interpretation. With a history of misunderstandings, I utilize my own system, for getting things done. Not unlike yourself selective, I am a visual thinker. When the visual solution process, has started, it doesn't really matter to me which is the wrong or right way. It does piss some people off, cos they think im ignoring their input. It does come accross sometimes as elitist, but once the visual process has started, my auditory perception takes a back seat. Quite simply, theyre talking but im not hearing

 

[Selectivemute122]

I take those who have their "right" way to be the inflexible ones. I openly deny proper procedure. I recognize for example that a fork could be used to pick chicken out of soup when it seems proper for others to use a spoon. I do what works for me, there are definetly times though where a common sense approach is more effective but my goal is simply to get something done and I can do it my way as well. I'm not overly familiar with Aspergers but I heard that those who have it lack the ability to play imaginatively. I don't fit into this description, I have had as a young child inner storylines of pure imagintiation. Being a visual thinker and others it seems inaccurate to suggest Aspergers inhibts imagintiave apply. It may not be a required criterion on the other hand.

 

[Vaegrant]

I have found that I can only exist in my own imagination but that I can't find my way into other's. I daydream frequently but when my daughter wants me to act out a puppet show with her, I'm stymied.

 

[Selectivemute122]

I hate acting, I can't do it at all. I like to see overly dramatic people as good actors though.

 

[Kailee]

I remember making a friend in about the 6th grade, and I would only speak to them through notes. We would have whole conversations that way It made me so happy that someone actually tried to talk to me instead of just assuming that I didn't want to speak to them.