Hello: Have I found the right place?

[onlything]

Hey there. I think you'll fit just fine.

 

[Sits with Coyote]

Hey there. I think you'll fit just fine.

I am thinking so too, you guys are great. Thank you so much!

 

[BraidedPony]

I was wondering how you discovered you are an Aspie?
I diagnosed myself after looking into it for about 10 years. I know, I don’t rush into anything! Lol.

 

[Sits with Coyote]

I was wondering how you discovered you are an Aspie?
I diagnosed myself after looking into it for about 10 years. I know, I don’t rush into anything! Lol.

I listened to a lot of ASPIEs describing their traits and took 2 different online tests. On the AQ I got 47/50 and on the RAADS-R I got 157 Total. Most of all the symptoms and experiences fit and felt right. I have been a do it yourself-er all my life as I have NEVER been able to rely on any one and was very high functioning until my concussion robbed me of my edge. My gut feeling says this is right and I have relied heavily on that throughout my life and can honestly say that I have lived a charmed life outside of the social aspects.

 

[Sits with Coyote]

View attachment 47439

Nice!

 

[Sits with Coyote]

Hi Sits With Coyote! Welcome to the forum! I’m newly aware of being Aspie and I know what you mean about suddenly understanding so much about why life has been the way it is.
Since being on this forum and reading people’s stories I’m struck by how often we, Aspies, are mistreated.
I’m in my 60s too.

Especially in school, I was soo miserable!!

 

[Bella Pines]

Yep. Welcome to the club.

 

[Sits with Coyote]

Yep. Welcome to the club.

Thank you!!

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

Hi, I am not to sure where to start. I am a 67 yr. old widower who has been ostracized and bullied all my life, brought up to believe I was second rate and only useful for what I could do for others, and deserving nothing in return as my mere existence was a burden to those around me. To be seen and not heard, invisible until called upon. So because of the feed-back from my surroundings, I developed the life strategy of "begging" people to let me do something for them with nothing asked in return as I didn't deserve it. If there is one thing that amazes me, it is that NT s have no shame and not only take and take but then demand more and feel slighted for even having to ask as you should be able to read their minds and not even ask "how high" to jump.

So, about a week ago, I ran into the answer I have been searching for all my life. It is not me, it is them. I am an ASPIE and proud of it! Just because they don't know how to take an ND is not my problem, their loss!

My most pressing question at this time is; Will the ASPIE community accept me or will I be excluded there also? You tell me. Talk about a dream come true, a group of people that don't consider me trash to be used and thrown away. Somewhere I finally belong, WOW!

Aspies are mefiant as you have already noticed because they have made a lot of bad experience with other people. Furthermore at the higher end of IQ I find the distinction between other forms of neurodiversity and autism confusing. What aspies dislike is people who have another neurological problem ( for example a mental health problem ) and confuse that with asperger autism. I don t see a mental health problem in you however. What you describe is correct: People mob you right from the start of your life like they mob all neurodivergent people.

Behind neurodivergency there are different and new genes. The only thing that could get dangerous to normal humans is a new species of humans. I for example want to found my own species of highly intelligent maniacs But normal people fear the different genes - aka the new species of humans which are trying to develope.

Here is my neurodiversity profile:

Now that I look closer to it I am realy not so much interested in neurotypcal forms of conversations, I rather like swarm talk

 

[Sits with Coyote]

Aspies are mefiant as you have already noticed because they have made a lot of bad experience with other people. Furthermore at the higher end of IQ I find the distinction between other forms of neurodiversity and autism confusing. What aspies dislike is people who have another neurological problem ( for example a mental health problem ) and confuse that with asperger autism. I don t see a mental health problem in you however. What you describe is correct: People mob you right from the start of your life like they mob all neurodivergent people.

Behind neurodivergency there are different and new genes. The only thing that could get dangerous to normal humans is a new species of humans. I for example want to found my own species of highly intelligent maniacs But normal people fear the different genes - aka the new species of humans which are trying to develope.

Here is my neurodiversity profile:

Now that I look closer to it I am realy not so much interested in neurotypcal forms of conversations, I rather like swarm talk

I tend to agree, society is always alarmed by difference even though they claim to applaud it. Could you help me understand your definition of "swarm talk"?

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

To understand swarm talk you need to understand the theory of genetics, how brains recognize patterns and what patterns people react to.

Swarm talk is what happpens when you see, feel and - well smell - how determinism works in you and others.

In this moment you can see how interacting signals, peoples and epecially rythmic patterns work on you and others. This enables you to direct a communication of many people with differing intelligence and educations level in one direction (I try to make them more peacefull before they stress each other and me with their strange theories about living and the mind

I can usually predict roughly what an individual will say and which outsides signals reduce his concentration.

If neurodivergent people talk to normal people there can be a quiet sizeable time delay ("processing time") till they understand and react to the signals and information you give them.

I am particularly good at seeing such patterns in humans because my pychosis is still running - in the technical sense. This makes my brain more connected - aka I can see more and more different patterns - and faster than neuronormal people.

I sometimes even have deja-vu problems. This means that some informations enter my brain faster than it should do. The brain - because it calculates a time delay that is now redundant - than thinks that I can "foresee" what it is happening (even impredictable stuff such as wind patterns).

But this is of course not the case. My brain is only seriously confused about the speed information is coming in I try to take it calmly although beeing able to "predict the future" (even a little bit) should normaly freak people out.

 

[Sits with Coyote]

To understand swarm talk you need to understand the theory of genetics, how brains recognize patterns and what patterns people react to.

Swarm talk is what happpens when you see, feel and - well smell - how determinism works in you and others.

In this moment you can see how interacting signals, peoples and epecially rythmic patterns work on you and others. This enables you to direct a communication of many people with differing intelligence and educations level in one direction (I try to make them more peacefull before they stress each other and me with their strange theories about living and the mind

I can usually predict roughly what an individual will say and which outsides signals reduce his concentration.

If neurodivergent people talk to normal people there can be a quiet sizeable time delay ("processing time") till they understand and react to the signals and information you give them.

I am particularly good at seeing such patterns in humans because my pychosis is still running - in the technical sense. This makes my brain more connected - aka I can see more and more different patterns - and faster than neuronormal people.

I sometimes even have deja-vu problems. This means that some informations enter my brain faster than it should do. The brain - because it calculates a time delay that is now redundant - than thinks that I can "foresee" what it is happening (even impredictable stuff such as wind patterns).

But this is of course not the case. My brain is only seriously confused about the speed information is coming in I try to take it calmly although beeing able to "predict the future" (even a little bit) should normaly freak people out.

I can understand what you are saying, I however, almost never talk to more than one person at a time unless I am "presenting" something to them.
If you pay attention to details and arrange them in patterns, as you say, you can appear to predict future events. Sometimes a source of great contention both to yourself and to others! In most cases all I can do is hope I am wrong but I rarely am, unfortunately!

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

In most cases all I can do is hope I am wrong but I rarely am, unfortunately!

If you say that than you can possible see (and feel and perhaps smell) determinism in one person too - the way you and him influence each other. This feels disagreable because it seems more like you are both biological robots (which is the most likely exlanation of what happens). If you find this kind of conversation disagreable it might be wise to switch out of the "analysis-mode" and do not care if this seems robot like. Simply enjoy your time with the other human.

But if you or others are in danger you should use your predictive power because they are not aware of the biological robot problem. Everyone believes he has free will and controll over himself and when the illusion breaks most people go mad.

I am currently trying something like this (predicting and apeasing people) for more than one person. The system of people around me is so re-inforcing stress that is already likely to produce a fatality by physical violence (!). I am just not able to predict who is the most likely to get killed - there are several paths and options possible.

By emotional violence they have already killed people (an aged genius, and a young friendly woman who already had a suicidal ideation). They almost drove me into suicide too (because they fear me) but this is the most stupid thing to.

If I would be able to work in peace together for say two weaks with other neurodivergent people and some normal people too we could solve all problems of mankind - or so is my prediction which is a bit more difficult to do ofcourse than predicting the behaviour of one person

 

[Sits with Coyote]

If you say that than you can possible see (and feel and perhaps smell) determinism in one person too - the way you and him influence each other. This feels disagreable because it seems more like you are both biological robots (which is the most likely exlanation of what happens). If you find this kind of conversation disagreable it might be wise to switch out of the "analysis-mode" and do not care if this seems robot like. Simply enjoy your time with the other human.

But if you or others are in danger you should use your predictive power because they are not aware of the biological robot problem. Everyone believes he has free will and controll over himself and when the illusion breaks most people go mad.

I am currently trying something like this (predicting and apeasing people) for more than one person. The system of people around me is so re-inforcing stress that is already likely to produce a fatality by physical violence (!). I am just not able to predict who is the most likely to get killed - there are several paths and options possible.

By emotional violence they have already killed people (an aged genius, and a young friendly woman who already had a suicidal ideation). They almost drove me into suicide too (because they fear me) but this is the most stupid thing to.

If I would be able to work in peace together for say two weaks with other neurodivergent people and some normal people too we could solve all problems of mankind - or so is my prediction which is a bit more difficult to do ofcourse than predicting the behaviour of one person

I wish you all the luck in your noble endeavor.

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

Thank you for listening to me. I hope I did not write to much information to quick again and I wish you all the best for your own life (which sounds complicated too).

 

[Sits with Coyote]

Thank you for listening to me. I hope I did not write to much information to quick again and I wish you all the best for your own life (which sounds complicated too).

We're good, you sound a lot like me when I experience a blood sugar crisis. I call it "rushing" as my mind goes a million miles an hour like in dire panic mode.
My situation is VERY lonely, my best friend, my wife, passed away about 2.5 years ago, my middle son got a divorce, moved away about 8 months ago and never calls. Now my youngest son has moved to the east coast, so I am all alone in this town of about 10,000 with no friends or relatives and nothing to do. I have been trying to come up with a way of meeting some fellow ASPIES since I really don't get along with NTs but haven't thought of any yet.

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

Hi, maybe you can find other friends online here and than we later see if there are some close to you? I am from Germany.

I can introduce you to some autist friend of mine, if you want. She is very ineligent but more interested in arts. She as well very young compared to you. But maybe we can build some kind of network.

Please describe me what you mean by blood sugar crisis? Maybe this aplies to my brain too.

 

[Joshua the Writer]

Yes.

 

[tree]

We're good, you sound a lot like me when I experience a blood sugar crisis. I call it "rushing" as my mind goes a million miles an hour like in dire panic mode.

Hypoglycemic episodes?

 

[IQ>150bipolarasperger?]

It is possible that it has a connection with what the staff member @tree says. In the manic mode my brain is propably using more sugar than it should and the problem could be confined to the brain. But in this case the brain should start the auto-deactivation mode, make me unconscient and collapse to receive more sugar for the brain activity.

Can one maintain a state where the brain is using to much sugar, is running very fast, and at the same time not making you collapse for a long time?

I have to admitt that I am sometimes purposefully retrict my oxygen supply by technics I have learned from analyzing apnoe diving.