Hello, I want to ask for advice

[Mossgreen]

You will learn that autism is not just A spectrum, but a number of spectra crisscrossing each other. There is no one set of criteria that defines all autistics, or even most. We are all different in our details, even if we share some similarities. Welcome to your new home.

Thank you, I much appreciate the advice. Also thank you for taking the time.

 

[Mossgreen]

It is entirely possible to have any of the characteristics on a spectrum ranging from "not noticeable" to "debilitating," so you may not actually show several symptoms.

Also, it can happen that a person will show more obvious symptoms under certain conditions (example: mine are much more obvious when I am under stress), or at different times of their life, or depending on their life experiences (example: I'm OK touching people I know well, and it isn't a problem because I avoid casual acquaintances, and handsy strangers).

Also, most people to not typify the stereotype. The stereotype "they don't get sarcasm" is overblown.

But for me, that stereotype plays out like this:

I do something at work, but it doesn't work out exactly right. My boss says "Nice job!"

I will probably miss the voice tone and facial movements that indicate sarcasm, and assume my boss means "Nice job under the circumstances."

Thank you, that helps a lot.

 

[WhitewaterWoman]

I didn't want to imply that you don't have these characteristics, I just thought if I now include this major point, I can't forget the others. Sorry, whenever I post something on the internet I get nervous and tend to make some mistakes.
Anyway, for me it also depends on the person if I am able to communicate smoothly or not. With most I struggle to find a balance or the dynamic doesn't fit me and wears me out, but with some I am able to communicate seemingly endlessly without worrying about equal participation or how I am viewed at the moment based on what I said.

I have the same trouble with posting. I have to be careful how I word things that seem obvious to me, but someone else may mistake for something quite different. I does make me nervous.

I have learned how to make about 10 minutes of conversation with someone I don't know but you have to talk to for some reason. You're standing in a long line and people just to complain, or whatever. But if it goes past 10 minutes, I'm at a loss.

I've had decades of practice and I learned by doing and making mistakes. I bet you pick it up more more quickly. Especially if you hang out here. Lots of good people.

 

[Mossgreen]

I have the same trouble with posting. I have to be careful how I word things that seem obvious to me, but someone else may mistake for something quite different. I does make me nervous.

I have learned how to make about 10 minutes of conversation with someone I don't know but you have to talk to for some reason. You're standing in a long line and people just to complain, or whatever. But if it goes past 10 minutes, I'm at a loss.

I've had decades of practice and I learned by doing and making mistakes. I bet you pick it up more more quickly. Especially if you hang out here. Lots of good people.

I see what you mean; When I write poems I sometimes get told people don't understand what I'm hinting at because they haven't informed themselves about the same topics and then misinterpret what I was trying to say.

Thank you for the advice, it's quite encouraging and I much appreciate it.

 

[Faren]

Hello, (very sorry, I like writing detailed.)
I usually don't comment on the Internet since that's not easily controllable and obviously not very private, but I could really use some advice, if you don't mind.
I was recently diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder, but am still sceptical.
I was initially being viewed for social anxiety as I was having 'nervous breakdowns', as we will call them, but the doctors told me it looked more like I was on the Spectrum.
After 2 appointments, 1 testing and 2 questionnaires, I was told I was getting the diagnosis. Still, I am sceptical, as I had the impression that they might have misunderstood me and I believe it was too brief to actually say for sure that I am autistic. It is noteworthy that I learned a lot about Autism inbetween the appointments, which might have subconsciously influenced my behavior, as it would have been nice to have a definition and justification for the way I am, and that the medical report is also pretty brief. For example, they mention 'missed the cut-off number of childhood autism symptoms by 2 points, but shows significant amount of with autism associated symptoms', but do not mention which autism criteria specifically is met here.
However, since I don't know any diagnosed people around me, I wanted to ask for advice on here:
Contra
1. I am pretty sure I can read facial expressions just fine and understand sarcasm and irony, therefore knowing the purpose of different intonation (right word? - Very sorry, English is not my first language).
2. I have friends and have never had problems keeping friendships until puberty when everyone seemed to drift into specific interests like parties and relationships while I didn't.
3. I have had the feeling that I was more passionate than others, but I wouldn't say my interests were incredibly unusually intense. If anything, then they'd be unusual for my age (Horror movies, especially Stephen King's It at 11 or learning everything about Oscar Wilde's life at 15. I have also always been fascinated by language and storytelling; my interest in correcting spelling mistakes has been the reason of me being called a smartmouth before, though not necessarily in a negative way.)
4. Therefore, I have also always had a vivid imagination and imaginative play has been my favorite way of playing.
5. I like physical contact
6. I only do not like eye contact with strangers as I am 'looking into their soul', but I cannot guarantee that this has always been that way.
7. I am positive I do not have sensory issues.
8. I believe I myself show a normal amount of facial expression and intonation.
9. I do not have a clearly defined "social battery". I have had one before, I would say, but today I could be considered pretty durable. It can only become a bit critical throughout a longer period of time if I don't have enough privacy and a place to be alone in.
Pro
1. I have had repetitive behaviors like my parents having to read a specific story to me every night as a toddler, watching specific movies over and over until I was sick of them or making noises in my teenage years (Not much more though).
2. I struggle to initiate contact and respond as expected (body language, correct facial expressions, eye contact, talking, or simply not confident enough, whatever it might be) to others (strangers) trying to build up contact to me for whatever reason. *
3. I am very conform to rules. (But I wouldn't necessarily say it is because it gives me order and security, but rather because I enjoy control as I despise mistakes.) This conformity means I do not drink or do drugs or skip classes, which does not make me fun at parties (which is a joke as I have never been to a real party).
4. In addition, I seemed to have a understanding of literature and language that a lot of other peers did not show.
5. I have a more unusual sense of style and all my clothes have to meet specific criteria.

Noteworthy: *
As a toddler I was not interested in initiating contact, I much rather observed others, but when others approached me I usually interacted with them appropriately and was able to uphold a friendship without problems.
I believe the problem with finding friends in later years is that adolescents are much more personal and indirect than children who just come to you, play with you once and call you their friend. They are much more open-minded as they are still exploring the world, their teenaged versions however limit their number of interests drastically and expect you to work the same way as them - shown by small talk (which disinterests me) and similar body language - in order to let you into phase 1 of getting-to-know-each-other (this is based on my observation, it doesn't have to be true at all). Once I am in phase one, however I did this, I struggle to continue as I don't know what the 'social protocol' sees as acceptable.

With this information, my question is: can any of you perhaps relate or would you say it doesn't sound much like autism but more like a childhood problem?

Hello and welcome to the forum. I'm brand new myself and only joined this past Monday. I was recently told by my psychiatrist that she strongly suspects I have autism, and gave me an article to read on it. She hasn't been wrong before so I consider this an official diagnosis for now, considering the fact that I do seem to relate to a good handful of autistic traits and that autism does seem to run in my family. We have yet to have another appointment/discussion on it as I'm waiting for my health insurance to kick in.

That being said, most online stuff I've watched or read does not seem to relate to me much, but the stuff in the article she sent me seems to relate WAY more. I'll share the link here if you like, so you can browse through it as well and see if anything stands out to you.

That being said, the article is titled "Understanding undiagnosed autism in adult females" and I have no idea if you're female as your profile doesn't seem to specify. But perhaps you'll find helpful information in it regardless.

Obviously I have no ability to diagnose anybody, but at least to me personally, it does not seem like you have autism. The "pros" you listed, to me at least, just look like normal personality traits one might have. Perhaps get multiple opinions from different mental health providers? A second, third, or fourth opinion never hurts, especially if you have doubts or are unsure. Doctors are not perfect and do make mistakes sometimes.

Understanding undiagnosed autism in adult females

 

[Mossgreen]

Hello and welcome to the forum. I'm brand new myself and only joined this past Monday. I was recently told by my psychiatrist that she strongly suspects I have autism, and gave me an article to read on it. She hasn't been wrong before so I consider this an official diagnosis for now, considering the fact that I do seem to relate to a good handful of autistic traits and that autism does seem to run in my family. We have yet to have another appointment/discussion on it as I'm waiting for my health insurance to kick in.

That being said, most online stuff I've watched or read does not seem to relate to me much, but the stuff in the article she sent me seems to relate WAY more. I'll share the link here if you like, so you can browse through it as well and see if anything stands out to you.

That being said, the article is titled "Understanding undiagnosed autism in adult females" and I have no idea if you're female as your profile doesn't seem to specify. But perhaps you'll find helpful information in it regardless.

Obviously I have no ability to diagnose anybody, but at least to me personally, it does not seem like you have autism. The "pros" you listed, to me at least, just look like normal personality traits one might have. Perhaps get multiple opinions from different mental health providers? A second, third, or fourth opinion never hurts, especially if you have doubts or are unsure. Doctors are not perfect and do make mistakes sometimes.

Understanding undiagnosed autism in adult females

The article is very helpful, thank you. I hadn't found that one before and much appreciate it. I don't like sharing information publically on the internet, which is why my profile doesn't show gender or age.

I have wanted to get a second (and third, and fourth, and fifth - which is a joke but with a certain tone of seriousness) opinion, but because of personal reasons I probably won't be able to in the near future, which is why I came here to see if anyone relates to me in order to help me 'figure it out' just a bit more. But I will most likely do that sometime, so I will keep it in mind, thanks.

I wish you much luck with finding out more about yourself.

 

[Faren]

The article is very helpful, thank you. I hadn't found that one before and much appreciate it. I don't like sharing information publically on the internet, which is why my profile doesn't show gender or age.

I have wanted to get a second (and third, and fourth, and fifth - which is a joke but with a certain tone of seriousness) opinion, but because of personal reasons I probably won't be able to in the near future, which is why I came here to see if anyone relates to me in order to help me 'figure it out' just a bit more. But I will most likely do that sometime, so I will keep it in mind, thanks.

I wish you much luck with finding out more about yourself.

Thank you and glad I was able to help some.