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Hello World!

Y

yrz!

New Member
Hello all,

I'm a 35 yo male from Europe, currently seeking diagnosis.
The reason I'm embarking on this journey is due to problems I've had throughout my child, adolescence and adult life.

Many are related to my intolerance to injustice and dishonesty of other people, but also because of my tantrums/meltdowns/etc and inability to fit in groups.

I came to this forum as a suggestion from a distant relative, who is on the spectrum herself, and a therapist.

I had a screening test with her, had a really long discussion about my struggles, and she suggested I talk clearly to my psychologist about this and ask to be formally diagnosed.

He (my psychologist) told me I already know I'm on the spectrum and suggested a formal diagnosis wouldn't be worth the money. But anyways, I told him I really wanted to be diagnosed as I need answers to questions I can't or don't know I should ask.

For instance, why would I use unplugged earphones at the office if no one else did?

Another example would be being yelled at by colleagues and higher hierarchy just because I couldn't understand stuff other people could. This kind of experiences brought me into hiding myself in shame over the years

Unfortunately I'm so used to these experiences that I just don't talk about with other people. Some because of shame, others because I think they are just normal.

These are just very simple examples. I don't know how specific I can/should be here, but knowing there are other people who understand why I do what I do, and things like hypersensitivity and ADHD exist, there might be an explanation why I act the way I do.

My interests are mostly related to IT, cooking and (my current special one), public rail transport automatic announcements :)

Anyways, my apologies for the long introduction. I hope to have a great time here and get to meet other like-minded people.

Best,
Y
 
Last edited:
welcome to af.webp
 
Hello @yrz! .I hope your recognition of your ASD will bring you closure, and a way forward. Understanding is good, but sometimes not sufficient. I believe this; that our ASD has influenced our lives, but we are not our ASD.
 
Hi and welcome. I hope you will get some ideas and answers here. Sounds like getting a diagnosis won't be too hard, apart from the cost and waiting time. A lot here self diagnose, it isn't rocket science in my opinion, the isolation and communication difficulties are really typical of the different aspie brain. We tend not to be wired to intuit as NTs do. Awkward.

Also your niche interests... very typical. However there's good strategies for many, it's definitely easier to find what to do to develop ways of coping if you know you are on the spectrum. Hope that all goes well for you. Pre realising about my high autistic traits or Aspergers / ASD 1, I found strategies, but understanding how autism in some ways affects my brain has been useful.

We can work on some of these issues and develop or use more of our abilities, for example our good thinking skills can often be useful, if we can stop going down the path of just expressing emotions, to work on seeing the other person and thinking about how they are, and what motivates them. An endless journey of self discovery and adjustment, in order to live a happier life. I hope you enjoy it here and find ideas and support.
 
Welcome!

I have faced very similar work problems, also from being so justice oriented and not understanding what was going on. My bosses did not yelled at me, but probably have grown older faster. :eek:

Curiosly (call it Karma) now I have two people under my supervision who have so many autists traits and they are testing me the same way I tested my bosses. I try hard not to yell at them, but I face palm myself quite often when they told me how they got to some specific conclussion on something. :D:D

I am not diagnosed. I hope you will have a nice time here. :)
 
Welcome!

In my signature line there's a link to a mini-course that might be of interest to you in identifying how to navigate the workplace.
 
Hello everyone!

I wasn't expecting such a warm welcome! :-)

Thank you all for such kind words!

In response to @Thinx and @Gerald Wilgus, yes, that's my goal - understand how my brain works and ideally, take advantage of that :-)

@Silhouette Mirage, many tbh. I like several work-related subjects such as automation, databases, operating systems or old tech :-)
But I also like science fiction related stuff, like the Matrix movies :D

@Atrapa Almas, knowing there are other people who went and are going through all this is very comforting. It makes me feel I'm not that "unique" and there are others that understand atypical points of view. I'm (still) not on a leading role, but I'm looking forward to that when the opportunity comes :-)

@VictorR, thanks! I'll take a look :)

Best,
Y
 
@yrz! -

If you have not already read it, I would highly recommend Dr Tony Attwood’s book ‘The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome’

As you wait for your formal diagnosis, this book will better prepare you for that appointment as well as give you a more in-depth understanding of Asperger’s itself.

Although I do not have children, reading the sections about childhood behavior triggered many memories that I did not remember and filled in many parts of the puzzle for me.

There are also many informative videos on YouTube by Dr Tony Attwood which really helped me understand myself better and I believe it may do the same for you.

I’m new here as well and Welcome Aboard!
 
Orange Glasses said:
@yrz! -

If you have not already read it, I would highly recommend Dr Tony Attwood’s book ‘The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome’

As you wait for your formal diagnosis, this book will better prepare you for that appointment as well as give you a more in-depth understanding of Asperger’s itself.

Although I do not have children, reading the sections about childhood behavior triggered many memories that I did not remember and filled in many parts of the puzzle for me.

There are also many informative videos on YouTube by Dr Tony Attwood which really helped me understand myself better and I believe it may do the same for you.

I’m new here as well and Welcome Aboard!
Click to expand...
Thank you so much @Orange Glasses ! I just read the sample and it looks quite interesting. I'll buy it.
 
yrz! said:
Hello all,

I'm a 35 yo male from Europe, currently seeking diagnosis.
The reason I'm embarking on this journey is due to problems I've had throughout my child, adolescence and adult life.

Many are related to my intolerance to injustice and dishonesty of other people, but also because of my tantrums/meltdowns/etc and inability to fit in groups.

I came to this forum as a suggestion from a distant relative, who is on the spectrum herself, and a therapist.

I had a screening test with her, had a really long discussion about my struggles, and she suggested I talk clearly to my psychologist about this and ask to be formally diagnosed.

He (my psychologist) told me I already know I'm on the spectrum and suggested a formal diagnosis wouldn't be worth the money. But anyways, I told him I really wanted to be diagnosed as I need answers to questions I can't or don't know I should ask.

For instance, why would I use unplugged earphones at the office if no one else did?

Another example would be being yelled at by colleagues and higher hierarchy just because I couldn't understand stuff other people could. This kind of experiences brought me into hiding myself in shame over the years

Unfortunately I'm so used to these experiences that I just don't talk about with other people. Some because of shame, others because I think they are just normal.

These are just very simple examples. I don't know how specific I can/should be here, but knowing there are other people who understand why I do what I do, and things like hypersensitivity and ADHD exist, there might be an explanation why I act the way I do.

My interests are mostly related to IT, cooking and (my current special one), public rail transport automatic announcements :)

Anyways, my apologies for the long introduction. I hope to have a great time here and get to meet other like-minded people.

Best,
Y
Click to expand...
yrz! said:
Hello all,

I'm a 35 yo male from Europe, currently seeking diagnosis.
The reason I'm embarking on this journey is due to problems I've had throughout my child, adolescence and adult life.

Many are related to my intolerance to injustice and dishonesty of other people, but also because of my tantrums/meltdowns/etc and inability to fit in groups.

I came to this forum as a suggestion from a distant relative, who is on the spectrum herself, and a therapist.

I had a screening test with her, had a really long discussion about my struggles, and she suggested I talk clearly to my psychologist about this and ask to be formally diagnosed.

He (my psychologist) told me I already know I'm on the spectrum and suggested a formal diagnosis wouldn't be worth the money. But anyways, I told him I really wanted to be diagnosed as I need answers to questions I can't or don't know I should ask.

For instance, why would I use unplugged earphones at the office if no one else did?

Another example would be being yelled at by colleagues and higher hierarchy just because I couldn't understand stuff other people could. This kind of experiences brought me into hiding myself in shame over the years

Unfortunately I'm so used to these experiences that I just don't talk about with other people. Some because of shame, others because I think they are just normal.

These are just very simple examples. I don't know how specific I can/should be here, but knowing there are other people who understand why I do what I do, and things like hypersensitivity and ADHD exist, there might be an explanation why I act the way I do.

My interests are mostly related to IT, cooking and (my current special one), public rail transport automatic announcements :)

Anyways, my apologies for the long introduction. I hope to have a great time here and get to meet other like-minded people.

Best,
Y
Click to expand...
Be very welcome!
 
yrz! said:
Hello all,

I'm a 35 yo male from Europe, currently seeking diagnosis.
The reason I'm embarking on this journey is due to problems I've had throughout my child, adolescence and adult life.

Many are related to my intolerance to injustice and dishonesty of other people, but also because of my tantrums/meltdowns/etc and inability to fit in groups.

I came to this forum as a suggestion from a distant relative, who is on the spectrum herself, and a therapist.

I had a screening test with her, had a really long discussion about my struggles, and she suggested I talk clearly to my psychologist about this and ask to be formally diagnosed.

He (my psychologist) told me I already know I'm on the spectrum and suggested a formal diagnosis wouldn't be worth the money. But anyways, I told him I really wanted to be diagnosed as I need answers to questions I can't or don't know I should ask.

For instance, why would I use unplugged earphones at the office if no one else did?

Another example would be being yelled at by colleagues and higher hierarchy just because I couldn't understand stuff other people could. This kind of experiences brought me into hiding myself in shame over the years

Unfortunately I'm so used to these experiences that I just don't talk about with other people. Some because of shame, others because I think they are just normal.

These are just very simple examples. I don't know how specific I can/should be here, but knowing there are other people who understand why I do what I do, and things like hypersensitivity and ADHD exist, there might be an explanation why I act the way I do.

My interests are mostly related to IT, cooking and (my current special one), public rail transport automatic announcements :)

Anyways, my apologies for the long introduction. I hope to have a great time here and get to meet other like-minded people.

Best,
Y
Click to expand...
Hi fellow European, I'm German. Seeking an official diagnosis is quite a long journey where I live, I gave up on it.
I recommend staying with it, if your autism impacts your quality of life, such as your ability to keep a job or maintain relationships, it's sadly something many people on the spectrum struggle with.
In that case, you will benefit from a diagnosis!
 
Aneka said:
Hi fellow European, I'm German. Seeking an official diagnosis is quite a long journey where I live, I gave up on it.
I recommend staying with it, if your autism impacts your quality of life, such as your ability to keep a job or maintain relationships, it's sadly something many people on the spectrum struggle with.
In that case, you will benefit from a diagnosis!
Click to expand...
Hello to you too, fellow European! ☺️

Thank you for your kind words.

Actually, in my country (PT), you usually only get diagnosed if you have very conspicuous traits in your childhood.
I suppose the same happens in Germany?

@Orange Glasses Thanks for your suggestion. I bought the book and I'm currently reading it. Very very interesting, I may say.

Best,
Y
 
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