Annayoung
Member
Anna, I would like to offer this spin to you. I an new to this site and social media and typing on an I phone as well. Hang with me here.
Aspergers is not a disease or disability. It is more like a super ability. It's a wild horse that need some, love, care, time encouragement and some serious and deep thought on what you like and don't like. Be true to your own light. Disregard anyone that puts you down. An excellent life awaits you, your choose. No one can take control, but you can give self control away. Do not lose your self. It is perfect. Next.
Search the web for those that have or are suspected of having Aspers. Many, very many have changed the paradigm of human experience. Newton, Tesla, Bill Gates? Come on girl, give it a few days, focus, we do that better than some, decide specifically in detail what you want. Then stretch your wings and fly. I'm not sure about this but, if you fall some may be able to catch you.
There was a US pilot in the Korean War that bailed out at over 30000 feet. Chute never opened, hit pine trees on a steep mountain slope. Slid down the mountain on his butt. Lived, was frost bitten. Don't panic. Write me in a couple days after you get more feedback, please. EP
I wrote you a really nice reply and of course the draft disappeared.
I wrote about your hospitality and how you are an asset to this community not to say that I undervalue anyone else's kindness on this forum . Sometimes words or ideas come to me for specific people. This probably makes nonsense .
I was examined by two doctors if you look in the above post I do not have AS. I have severe deppression/anxiety . Low self esteem and little confidence in myself . I was also severely tramatized as a child by my brother who was diagnosed with aspergers . He has aspgerers but he is also incapable of loving other people. I had a friend in hs with as & he was the nicest guy ever. He had a few quirks but he never hurt me or anyone .
One example of trama is I was 4-6 for some reason I had a telephone on my lap. My brother set me up some how to answer the phone . I don't remember. Regardless I picked it up & I didn't know it was him . He told me he was watching me through the window he was outside and he was going to kill me. I was histerical and I think that was my first panic attack. I Remeber this happening at least five times . It happened at night . I also still have trouble sleeping . Eventually he admitted it was him he laughed and sneered in my face . I told him he was hurting me & he SMILED. Apparently my suffering was hilarious to him My mother eventually found out bc I told her and she put a stop to it.
I believe he makes aspergers people look bad because he uses it as an excuse .
To this day I struggle with the idea of dating Iam terrified of men. I think they will inevitably trash me . I try to protect myself from being a means to an end for any man ever again.
He never apologized , never acknowledged what he did . I think he was a coward . I blindly forgave him for the atrocities he commited against me . Maybe bc I loved him or maybe I was a doormat. I wonder what is wrong with me that I never ever gave up on him . I also wonder if because of my trama Iam like fossilized at the age it started . Iam innocent /naive/ genuinely not prejudiced . Talking to me you will actually not be judged (there are expections I'm not entirely perfect). I always try to do the right thing. I'm a terrible liar and I feel incapable of pulling off stealing . I'm super innocent like a little girl .i want everyone to be happy and to offend no one.
Excuse me if that was super long !