Hi my name is Eva

[EvaL]

Hi my name is Eva , I'm from Ireland .
I want to be completely honest here , I feel having asp sucks. It's really the feeling lonely part. I try my best . I'm ok at making some friends but keeping them is impossible .. can anyone relate ? I also feel like I'm an easy target for people . I just wish I could fit in and get on with people especially girls .. but we nearly always have beef or fall out... kind of sick of life sometimes ... it's strange because I get on very well with guys... but don't want to feel like I'm just valued for my looks.. I try my best to be a good person ... or 'normal' . I try to be considerate and kind. I would love to know where I'm going wrong .. or is life just meant to be so complicated @!

 

[EvaL]

Hi my name is Eva , I'm 27 , from Ireland .
I am an outgoing person Nd love traveling , dancing , shopping and going out.
But often my condition gets in the way of me being able to live my life in peace.
I want to be completely honest here , I feel having asp sucks. It's really the feeling lonely part. I try my best . I'm ok at making some friends but keeping them is impossible .. can anyone relate ? I also feel like I'm an easy target for people . I just wish I could fit in and get on with people especially girls .. but we nearly always have beef or fall out... kind of sick of life sometimes ... it's strange because I get on very well with guys... but don't want to feel like I'm just valued for my looks.. I try my best to be a good person ... or 'normal' . I try to be considerate and kind. I would love to know where I'm going wrong .. or is life just meant to be so complicated

 

[VictorR]

Welcome @EvaL

One saying that I think many identify with is that if life is a game, then being on the spectrum is like playing a game on hard mode / difficulty. So yes, it is kind of complicated.

Establishing and building relationships is a common thread for many of us here, so I'm probably not one to give advice, other than to be yourself and don't feel compelled to change who you are to fit in with someone or a group.

 

[Slime_Punk]

I want to be completely honest here , I feel having asp sucks. It's really the feeling lonely part. I try my best . I'm ok at making some friends but keeping them is impossible .. can anyone relate

Yes, but I've learned to embrace the loneliness and accept it as a gift, which has helped. I can only ever keep romantic partners around, never friends of the same gender as me. I'll probably never really know why.

 

[Heidi M.]

welcome @EvaL ... to a place with others similar to you.. it is a good feeling. My inner world is vast and amazing.. i love spending time alone.. people complicate my life and i often feel hurt or burned by relationships...

But i do like connecting with others and would love to have friends or one good friend.

When i am with someone I try to think about their world and find out what they are interested in.. people are like planets all unique and strange and interesting in their own ways. I almost Never have someone actually asked me about myself and that feels lonely. I guess that is why i try to ask others about what they do, or what they love to do

The thing that has made me the happiest is learning that i'm on the spectrum and that gave me the freedom not only to be myself, but be myself with happiness in who i am.. People don't hurt as much nowadays because I love myself more, hard to explain but it's true.

Also, exploring and finding my true self (w/out comparing myself to neurotypicals i guess is the best way to express what i'm saying) has been a fun adventure.. I like me. Without shame or comparing myself.. i feel a sense of great freedom, creativity and a happiness i never had growing up. Once I began to go inward, finding myself, loving me for being me.. then i began to appreciate others more and not be so offended by them..i'm not sure why but that is what happened.

anyway.. that's just me

and i hope you find a friend in yourself, maybe that's what we're supposed to do first.. idk..
i also stopped dating or talking to men for the same reason you mention but now i guess i see them as just people and i don't try to impress them .. i like the idea of being a woman's woman meaning being a sister to other women
i'm just babbling on but i am old now and if anything i have learned helps anyone.. then i just hope they could skip over some pain.

 

[Billthecat]

Welcome from the third world of Schengen area

 

[tree]

 

[Alexej]

Hi and Welcome @EvaL

DO hang around a bit and get to know us more

 

[Atrapa Almas]

Welcome!