How can you tell when you’re ready for bed?

[inkfingers]

I am very sensitive to light, though, so it goes further than just screen time. We live off-grid and have very dim lights in the evening, usually just a single Ryobi lantern hanging in the room and light from the TV if we watch a show with dinner.

Before we moved off-grid, I often stayed awake half the night, e.g., usually until 2-3 am. I would not be able to sleep for an hour or more after going to bed, so I would just stay up until I was exhausted--and sometimes, that did not help, either; I'd still have trouble sleeping.

Once we moved off-grid, and the lights were always dim in the evening, I stopped having trouble going to sleep--like, from the very first day, I started falling asleep almost immediately when I went to bed. I'd recommend anyone who's having trouble sleeping to at least give it a try. It's even cheaper than free, too, since it reduces electricity usage in the evenings.

You moved off-grid! I'm so jealous. When I move out of the house (I'm currently living at home while doing college) I want to move out into the middle of the mountains where I can live out my 100% introverted life

 

[inkfingers]

I generally don't have a set bedtime, which probably isn't very healthy, but I have insomnia, so I usually stay up till around 1:00 in the morning. It is a very weird sleep schedule, but I get a good nights rest, so I guess its ok. I think the insomnia is genetic, though. My grandma had it, and my dad has it as well.

 

[Fino]

I don't know. I don't understand it either! Maybe their symptoms aren't so bad.

I am part of an ADHD group on FB, and some of them think it's a "gift."

I like maybe a few of my quirky ADHD qualities, but I certainly would not call this a gift

I agree! I believe it's important to recognize the good parts of everything and what benefits something seemingly bad things may have had, but I've never gone so far as to consider any of my diagnoses "gifts".

 

[Tom]

I've had trouble sleeping on and off thru out life. Sleep aids can help but aren't infallible. Routine, in the long run seems the best medicine. The best development for me was ceasing to worry about it, if I couldn't sleep. I just lie in bed and let my mind wander and take some solace knowing I am at least getting body rest, which is better then nothing. Sometimes I use the time to write stories in my head. Thinking though the same story night after night, it becomes familiar and sedative of itself.

 

[Jojo_LB]

Yes, I agree that not worrying about it can be very helpful. The more you worry about it, the more wide awake you remain.

If you are able to, just try to calm down and relax if your difficulty in falling asleep is causing you anxiety. Do something that relaxes, but does not stimulate you. Take your mind off of the fact that you are having trouble, and focus on that relaxing activity. Sleep will come to you eventually.

Definitely talk to your doctor about it though, if it is a common occurrence and is causing problems with various areas of your life.

 

[Misery]

Oh yeah, not worrying is important.

My father gave me a bit of really good advice once: "Dont care about how much sleep you do or do not get. Instead, just enjoy the experience of laying in the comfy bed, and let your mind wander wherever".

But he also explained to me that sometimes, you get more sleep than you think you do. It's possible to have slept, while thinking your wakeful period wasnt actually interrupted.

For instance, I was at a convention with a friend once. Had a bad night. The following morning, I'm sorta starting to doze off, but he gets up. I check the clock. It's 7:00 AM. He starts doing his stuff, and I know he's going to leave the room the moment he's got his things, to give me a chance to sleep more. I close my eyes, and I'm listening to his movements, waiting for him to cross the room and open the big noisy door. He typically takes like 10 minutes to get going in that situation. I hear him rustling through his stuff, then eating a snack, and then he's quiet. And then more quietness. I'm still waiting to hear him walk by and go through that door. Nothing. Eventually I sit up, and he's gone. What? I look at the clock... and it's 4 hours later. As far as I could tell, my thought process had not been interrupted... but I'd clearly conked out for 4 hours anyway. Didnt make sense.

And after realizing that could happen, it's easier now to notice when it does.

All of this though is just more reason NOT to worry.

 

[tducey]

When you feel tired I say go to bed especially if it's after 10 10:30 at night.

 

[bbc-bananasplit]

This is major for me. I do not have much screen time in the evenings. Even with f.lux, I find that the things that I do online tend to stimulate my brain and wake me up.

I am very sensitive to light, though, so it goes further than just screen time. We live off-grid and have very dim lights in the evening, usually just a single Ryobi lantern hanging in the room and light from the TV if we watch a show with dinner.

That's interesting. How / In which way do you live off grid? Like off grid from electronics and communication or off grid away from everyone else? I live literally in the center of the city, first floor, and there always lots of cars all day an night + the tram, which makes the ground shake =D from 4.30 a.m. to 1 a.m. - so nearly all day and night. The mircale though is that my front door to the hall is so thick that the hallway (having no windows) is the most heavenly quiet place there is. I would sleep there, but there is too little room to put my bed ... -.-

 

[Bolletje]

I adhere to a bedtime routine and go to bed at the same time every night. This usually helps me fall asleep very quickly. If I have trouble falling asleep I use an app with ambient sounds. My favorite is a distant thunderstorm with raindrops falling on a tent roof. It's very soothing to me.

 

[Sab]

I’ve thought a lot about this in the past year and here’s what I found helpful:

Having a bedtime routine – I do certain things before bed that prepare me for sleep and that I get to associate with feeling tired and going to bed. Ex: taking a bath, dimming the lights, having herbal tea, giving myself a massage. Things that help me get out of my head and into my body to turn my brain off before bed.

Similar sleeping schedule every day – I stick to a similar sleeping schedule that can vary a little but it helps my body understand when it’s bedtime and when it’s not.

Avoiding stimulants – If I drink coffee, even if it’s early in the morning, I won’t be able to sleep well at night. So I stopped drinking coffee and black tea. I stick to green tea if I need a little boost but try to not have it in the afternoon or evening. I also avoid chocolate (cacao) and sugar in general but especially the hours before going to bed.

Regulating my nervous system with herbs – I regulate my stress levels with herbs throughout the day and have herbs to help me sleep at night. Lavender helps me chill out if I’m feeling a lot of stress during the day so I don’t accumulate it until bedtime. Right before bed, I can drink a mix of these herbs: skullcap, motherwort, catnip, valerian. They have sedative effects and really help me get good sleep. Valerian is especially powerful (at least for me) and makes me have funny weird dreams.

Supplements – I’ve used Melatonin a bit in the past but found that it would knock me out but then I’d wake up during the night and have trouble going bad to sleep (maybe if I took more it would work). My partner takes Magnesium before bed and found it super helpful!

Sleeping in darkness – I feel safer when there’s light but noticed that the darker it is the better I’ll sleep (if I don’t get too scared or haven’t watched horror movies right before ).

Spending less time in my bedroom during the day – I read that it helps to have the room you sleep in be a space that is for calm or fun activities so that the space is not associated with stress or work. I installed my computer in the living room of my apartment. That way I work outside of my room. I try to spend less time in my bed during the day so that when I go to bed, it’s associated with sleep. But I guess that’s not always possible, depending on your living situation. I still spend days in bed if I need to.

Screens and electronic devices – I (try to) keep away from my cellphone and computer an hour before I plan to go to sleep. I close them so I don’t hear them during the night.

That’s all I can think of right now. I hope this was helpful and that you’ll be able to find what works for you in order to get the sleep you need. Disturbed sleep is super hard and can affect mental health pretty badly. Take good care!

 

[UberScout]

Usually I can stay up for a pretty long time (I've been known to stay awake for 48 whole hours no joke), but eventually I'll hit a point where I feel like looking at Kirby fan art and listening to those Relaxing Nintendo/Pokemon/Kirby music playlists on YouTube, then before I know it I'm in bed.