How many heard "I'm done" from friends?

[olshtieg]

The norm of society is to ghost people now. I became aware that over talking to people about subjects of interest bothered them when I was 13 and so I started to listen to others more but as I grew older I got social anxiety about bothering people.

 

[Bella Pines]

I do not for the life of me get how anyone goes from being a so called friend who cares about you to over night not speaking to you.

It's not you.

It's them.

One of the main Aspergers gifts is logic. You say that these people are "good" people. Would a truely good person go from being a friend to not talking to you without a plausible explanation? No. That doesn't even make sense. It's sweet that you give them credit, but perhaps a little too much credit.

I agree with @Lysander, not only do NTs not have the loyalty or focus to maintain a lifelong friendship, they often seek drama and feel the need to create a scene. They are easily brain washed and 20 years of friendship will mean the world to us, but be quickly ignored by an NT if they are convinced otherwise. Like if they find out we are autistic and they've been told that's bad.They don't put too much thought into it, they will simply end the friendship, tell themselves it's the "right thing to do" and still consider themselves "good".

Now, not all of them are like this, there are a few that value loyalty and are consistence. I hope you find one.

 

[the_tortoise]

But when they like you for you but cannot tolerate your lack of respinsivemeness and feel that as a slight or something...

Good friends will try to understand and accept that you cannot always respond and it is not a personal insult or attempt to hurt them.

If they cannot understand or accept that, it doesn't mean they are terrible people, but they are not good friends for you.

 

[Michelle Espinosa]

It's not you.

It's them.

One of the main Aspergers gifts is logic. You say that these people are "good" people. Would a truely good person go from being a friend to not talking to you without a plausible explanation? No. That doesn't even make sense. It's sweet that you give them credit, but perhaps a little too much credit.

I agree with @Lysander, not only do NTs not have the loyalty or focus to maintain a lifelong friendship, they often seek drama and feel the need to create a scene. They are easily brain washed and 20 years of friendship will mean the world to us, but be quickly ignored by an NT if they are convinced otherwise. Like if they find out we are autistic and they've been told that's bad.They don't put too much thought into it, they will simply end the friendship, tell themselves it's the "right thing to do" and still consider themselves "good".

Now, not all of them are like this, there are a few that value loyalty and are consistence. I hope you find one.

It's interesting because I Ser how with them I literally just study and simulate. When a friend was bothered by the idea of learning how to communicate with me by learning a little about us, I forgot to tell him how much effort and what I have to do to communicate with him on his terms as an NT.

They get fed up but look at how much we do to accommodate them constantly.

I think you are right about us. I am fiercely loyal. And like most of us am good and do not have the capacity for treachery or games.

I am like m8st of us, a wonderful friend.

 

[Michelle Espinosa]

The norm of society is to ghost people now. I became aware that over talking to people about subjects of interest bothered them when I was 13 and so I started to listen to others more but as I grew older I got social anxiety about bothering people.

Me too. I've become wary of engaging with NTs. I feel like it's a trap and that they really are not equipped for real and honest communication and true acceptance of differences.