How to tell if an Aspie guy loves you?

[Aryana]

Initiated, were you the one that asked him out? Were you the one that started talking to him first or introduced yourself to him first?

Yes to all of the above! I was the one who stopped him and introduced myself and asked him his name. I was the one who asked him out. And every other time we went out together it was always me who asked him. He has never asked me. However after I told him I had feelings for him. He was the first to initiate physical touch he started massaging me one night. This is a boy who would stand probably 5 ft away from me lol at first.

 

[Steelbookcollector217]

Yes to all of the above! I was the one who stopped him and introduced myself and asked him his name. I was the one who asked him out. And every other time we went out together it was always me who asked him. He has never asked me. However after I told him I had feelings for him. He was the first to initiate physical touch he started massaging me one night. This is a boy who would stand probably 5 ft away from me lol at first.

Well that's epic and very admirable of you and if only more women in the world did that

 

[Aryana]

Well that's epic and very admirable of you and if only more women in the world did that

Thanks I appreciate that. Honestly I don't know where the courage came from. But I knew he was never going to do it. So I got the nerve and I just did it Life is too short. I knew I needed a try I did not want to live with any regrets! And I'm the first one who told him I had feelings for him otherwise we would still be in the friend zone right now.

 

[Steelbookcollector217]

Thanks I appreciate that. Honestly I don't know where the courage came from. But I knew he was never going to do it. So I got the nerve and I just did it Life is too short. I knew I needed a try I did not want to live with any regrets! And I'm the first one who told him I had feelings for him otherwise we would still be in the friend zone right now.

And do things look to be working out good between you so far as in is there a good connection going on so far?

 

[Aryana]

And do things look to be working out good between you so far as in is there a good connection going on so far?

Yes definitely a good connection. Honestly I think we both love each other.

 

[Steelbookcollector217]

How did you both first meet again?

 

[Aryana]

How did you both first meet again?

I run every morning early 4:30 he moved into my neighborhood and I would see him ride his bike around 5:30 in the morning. He was riding to work. Then pretty much after 6 months of just seeing each other he started to wave to me I would say hi or good morning how are you and all he would do is wave. That probably went on for about 5 months I could not get them to talk to me so finally I just stopped in one day and asked him where he worked that he had to leave so early. He answered me and then I introduced myself to him and then two days later when I saw him I said hi and it went back to a waving. I was like oh my gosh this boy will never talk to me but then after 2 weeks he started to say hi barely. That again went on for months could not get them to say anything more than high so finally I just stopped him one day on his bike and asked him out. It was cutie acted like a little boy when I asked him but he agreed to go for a hike with me. So we went for the hike and then at the end of course he's just standing there awkwardly looking at me so I asked him if he would like to hang out again. I think we went on about five hikes in one year but that's all we did and the only time I really saw him. He is a musician and he teaches guitar and other instruments so I asked him if he'd be willing to teach my girls guitar. And he said yes so then we started taking lessons from him and then our friendship just grew from there. But it has taken over 3 years to get to the point we are now. I thought it was never happening to be honest. This this is a guy who is stand 5 ft away from me and I remember a time I went to sit next to him and he spread his legs apart so I couldn't. Now look at us lol.

 

[Aryana]

I run every morning early 4:30 he moved into my neighborhood and I would see him ride his bike around 5:30 in the morning. He was riding to work. Then pretty much after 6 months of just seeing each other he started to wave to me I would say hi or good morning how are you and all he would do is wave. That probably went on for about 5 months I could not get them to talk to me so finally I just stopped in one day and asked him where he worked that he had to leave so early. He answered me and then I introduced myself to him and then two days later when I saw him I said hi and it went back to a waving. I was like oh my gosh this boy will never talk to me but then after 2 weeks he started to say hi barely. That again went on for months could not get them to say anything more than high so finally I just stopped him one day on his bike and asked him out. It was cutie acted like a little boy when I asked him but he agreed to go for a hike with me. So we went for the hike and then at the end of course he's just standing there awkwardly looking at me so I asked him if he would like to hang out again. I think we went on about five hikes in one year but that's all we did and the only time I really saw him. He is a musician and he teaches guitar and other instruments so I asked him if he'd be willing to teach my girls guitar. And he said yes so then we started taking lessons from him and then our friendship just grew from there. But it has taken over 3 years to get to the point we are now. I thought it was never happening to be honest. This this is a guy who is stand 5 ft away from me and I remember a time I went to sit next to him and he spread his legs apart so I couldn't. Now look at us lol.

Oh my gosh sorry for all the typos and the spellings I am doing talk to text and it's horrible

 

[paloftoon]

That’s assuming he’ll tell the truth.

There's too much friendship beforehand to assume this. If he was actually lying, this would be on that individual and not the person asking. Context dictates it's important to ask directly and privately. Some people like to keep their love more private and that's understandable. I mean, especially being on the spectrum, people look to try to attack us socially even if we've doing everything right. So, being on our guard in today's world and with the potential prejudices and manipulation we all have to deal with, I think it's smart to want to stay more private and only involve those that really really need to know like related family members and closer friends.

 

[Aryana]

There's too much friendship beforehand to assume this. If he was actually lying, this would be on that individual and not the person asking. Context dictates it's important to ask directly and privately. Some people like to keep their love more private and that's understandable. I mean, especially being on the spectrum, people look to try to attack us socially even if we've doing everything right. So, being on our guard in today's world and with the potential prejudices and manipulation we all have to deal with, I think it's smart to want to stay more private and only involve those that really really need to know like related family members and closer friends.

One thing I can say is that he is honest. Has never lied to me !!

 

[Steelbookcollector217]

I run every morning early 4:30 he moved into my neighborhood and I would see him ride his bike around 5:30 in the morning. He was riding to work. Then pretty much after 6 months of just seeing each other he started to wave to me I would say hi or good morning how are you and all he would do is wave. That probably went on for about 5 months I could not get them to talk to me so finally I just stopped in one day and asked him where he worked that he had to leave so early. He answered me and then I introduced myself to him and then two days later when I saw him I said hi and it went back to a waving. I was like oh my gosh this boy will never talk to me but then after 2 weeks he started to say hi barely. That again went on for months could not get them to say anything more than high so finally I just stopped him one day on his bike and asked him out. It was cutie acted like a little boy when I asked him but he agreed to go for a hike with me. So we went for the hike and then at the end of course he's just standing there awkwardly looking at me so I asked him if he would like to hang out again. I think we went on about five hikes in one year but that's all we did and the only time I really saw him. He is a musician and he teaches guitar and other instruments so I asked him if he'd be willing to teach my girls guitar. And he said yes so then we started taking lessons from him and then our friendship just grew from there. But it has taken over 3 years to get to the point we are now. I thought it was never happening to be honest. This this is a guy who is stand 5 ft away from me and I remember a time I went to sit next to him and he spread his legs apart so I couldn't. Now look at us lol.

your story should be an empowering message for women

 

[Kalinychta]

your story should be an empowering message for women

All of these women in your life who wish they could approach you but don’t - is there a way you can get the OP’s story to them?

 

[Steelbookcollector217]

No not really

One of my friends from middle school barely got his first ever girlfriend last year at 34 however he did have sex before but he was never exclusive with anyone until his current girlfriend.

It reminds me whenever I hear of someone not getting into their first relationship until late in life I have mixed emotions on that.

As in it feels like both a win and a loss at the same time