I am curious..

[tree]

Yes, that's what I'm asking you about.

What sorts of activities do you seek, when you are using the phone?
How do the activities serve to moderate your feelings?

 

[atticus]

there's nothing specific, no specific app. it can literally be anything. I have no idea how they serve to regulate my emotions. I just know emotions = phone in hand, playing with whatever app my thumb goes to first. sometimes I'll just sit and scroll through my email, sometimes I complete 15 levels on duolingo at once, what have you. then I realize I am spending too much time on an app, so I delete, just to play with another app just as much. there isn't any rhyme or reason to it. that's why I'm really specifically asking for advice from people who have struggled with this as well, because then I don't have to try to figure out why my brain wants to just play with my phone when I'm feeling some type of way. I would text my therapist about this, but I need to talk to someone who has experienced this.

 

[tree]

The activities are engrossing. Your attention is diverted from what
you are feeling, temporarily, it sounds like.

The emotions you experience--- How would you describe them?
What are the names of the feelings?
In Post#3 you mentioned: "...bored, anxious, in a new place, what have you..."

I made a small card for myself with the first one hundred digits of Pi
on it, in groupings, and when I am walking I can look at it to distract
myself from negative feelings by reciting the digits. And trying to
remember them.

 

[Bolletje]

is there anything you typically do when out in public (or new places, etc) and have to regulate to avoid facing the potential of having a public meltdown?

I usually listen to music or podcasts, when possible. Or read a magazine, or any text in my field of vision really.

When I feel an anxiety attack or meltdown coming on I try to ground myself with an exercise I learned in therapy at some point in time. I think it’s called the 5 senses or 54321 exercise. It doesn’t always work for me, but every time it does is a win.

In the exercise, you start by listing 5 things you can see from where you are.
Then 4 things you currently physically feel, such as the texture of your clothes or the breeze on your skin.
Then 3 things you can currently hear.
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste.

The idea is that focusing on your environment can help you break out of anxiety-inducing thought patterns. However, when the environment is causing a meltdown, and not my thoughts, this is usually a less helpful method for me.

 

[atticus]

The activities are engrossing. Your attention is diverted from what
you are feeling, temporarily, it sounds like.

The emotions you experience--- How would you describe them?
What are the names of the feelings?
In Post#3 you mentioned: "...bored, anxious, in a new place, what have you..."

I made a small card for myself with the first one hundred digits of Pi
on it, in groupings, and when I am walking I can look at it to distract
myself from negative feelings by reciting the digits. And trying to
remember them.

that is actually a great way to phrase it, yeah. definitely diverting my attention from the situation/emotion.

it's really hard for me to name some of the emotions. one is when my stomach feels like it's full of black sticky stuff, one feels like my body is on fire from the inside out, but then yeah anxiety and boredom are the biggest.

I like the card you mentioned, that seems a really cool way to divert my attention without getting lost in my phone...I might do something like that but with verb conjugations in different languages. thanks for mentioning that, I really like that idea.

 

[atticus]

I usually listen to music or podcasts, when possible. Or read a magazine, or any text in my field of vision really.

When I feel an anxiety attack or meltdown coming on I try to ground myself with an exercise I learned in therapy at some point in time. I think it’s called the 5 senses or 54321 exercise. It doesn’t always work for me, but every time it does is a win.

In the exercise, you start by listing 5 things you can see from where you are.
Then 4 things you currently physically feel, such as the texture of your clothes or the breeze on your skin.
Then 3 things you can currently hear.
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste.

The idea is that focusing on your environment can help you break out of anxiety-inducing thought patterns. However, when the environment is causing a meltdown, and not my thoughts, this is usually a less helpful method for me.

oooh yeah, I hear that one is really good. my therapist suggested doing that ages ago, but I can never remember what the things are, lol. perhaps I could make a card like tree did, but with the grounding exercises listed...hmmm.....thanks for mentioning that!! but yeah, I can see how it wouldn't be helpful when it's the environment that's triggering the meltdown

 

[tree]

@atticus

That would be fun, verb conjugations.
What languages?

The card I made is about the size of a credit card.
On cardboard. With clear tape over the numbers
so they don't get smudged.

 

[atticus]

@atticus

That would be fun, verb conjugations.
What languages?

The card I made is about the size of a credit card.
On cardboard. With clear tape over the numbers
so they don't get smudged.

that was my thinking, too =) mostly Spanish and German, perhaps French as well. it seems like the card you made fits perfectly just about anywhere you could need it, I really like that! especially putting tape

 

[atticus]

It's only started to wear off when I couldn't use the tablet\phone for different reasons then I just move onto the closest in form

that's been my experience as well. it is super frustrating because I need to find other outlets.. this much screen time can't be good, especially now that most of my work is completed on a computer.

 

[Skittlebisquit]

I hope you find solace and support here, many of us are on better moods than we likely should be, due to the benefits of friendship. I do not believe that any here are being deliberately disrespectful. I hope you feel welcomed and cherished here.
For me the phone is largely used to access this forum and for little else. I spend alot of time here, and the more time i spend here, the better i feel. Please forgive my friends if they seem overly casual or flippant, they are not being mean, just happy.

The issue of displacement, is best left tabled for the present, your query is about stims. I never had one i didnt make. I like harness rings. And paracord, and have made many using those, and short sections of tubing to act as beads. I carry a chain with 23 links in it made into a circle. It is the light kind, devorative. I pour it from hand to hand. I use polished rocks to count the repititions of affirmations i say, and place each stone on a large platter, in a pleasing design. I carve wood, i dont make things, just smooth sticks. I tie the sticks to cordage, run it thru a ring, sometimes braid it. I like plants, so i have a little area that has plants, there are alot of them so a feast for the eyes. Buy some new leather work gloves that fit properly

I never go in public, plz disregard the last city people are ez to frighten. Perhaps some more basic things. A cotton ball, a bit of leather, a polished rock, all in a little pouch?

 

[Streetwise]

that's been my experience as well. it is super frustrating because I need to find other outlets.. this much screen time can't be good, especially now that most of my work is completed on a computer.

It's an addiction if? its injurious to you ,so you need advice if so .

 

[Fino]

I go with what works. I use my phone like that. It's great. I'm very grateful to have it.

 

[Major Tom]

Get physical, do some exercise and say no to using the phone until you've been awake for at least an hour. Make paper lists of things to do. Sit up straight and breath deeply, don't slouch. It helps me.(A fellow phone/internet addict).

 

[atticus]

I go with what works. I use my phone like that. It's great. I'm very grateful to have it.

I am glad it works for you.

 

[atticus]

Get physical, do some exercise and say no to using the phone until you've been awake for at least an hour. Make paper lists of things to do. Sit up straight and breath deeply, don't slouch. It helps me.(A fellow phone/internet addict).

hmm well I exercise twice a day, 5-6 days a week so that's covered, as well as yoga after waking and before sleep. I don't slouch, had to get physical therapy to fix that. I don't typically use my phone in the mornings except for music on the way to work. it's literally when I'm in a strong emotional state that it becomes a problem.

 

[Greatshield17]

@atticus it sounds like you’ve gotten help with this, but I’ll say a couple of things myself which hopefully may add to the help you’ve received. Firstly, I myself am trying to revert to a dumb phone and in fact, am hoping do buy a SIM for it today. I was going to suggest looking at interesting things in your surrounding, the weather, images on the wall, architecture, plant life etc. but if the surroundings are what’s disturbing or triggering you, that’ll obviously be a real struggle. Someone also suggested bringing books to read, which is something I myself would’ve suggested as well. As for learning new languages, if you want more to learn, may I suggest my own ancestral language of Basque?

 

[atticus]

@atticus it sounds like you’ve gotten help with this, but I’ll say a couple of things myself which hopefully may add to the help you’ve received. Firstly, I myself am trying to revert to a dumb phone and in fact, am hoping do buy a SIM for it today. I was going to suggest looking at interesting things in your surrounding, the weather, images on the wall, architecture, plant life etc. but if the surroundings are what’s disturbing or triggering you, that’ll obviously be a real struggle. Someone also suggested bringing books to read, which is something I myself would’ve suggested as well. As for learning new languages, if you want more to learn, may I suggest my own ancestral language of Basque?

thanks! I was tempted to do the same and go buy an old flip phone, but that would take music away from me and that is a huge part of my life. dumb reason to keep a smartphone, I know, lol. heyyy, my family is from Andalucía, I was considering learning Basque once I'm finished with Castellano through this thread I have determined a large portion of my issue here is because of emotional dysregulation, so I've thrown myself into researching how to improve my regulating abilities.

 

[Greatshield17]

thanks! I was tempted to do the same and go buy an old flip phone, but that would take music away from me and that is a huge part of my life. dumb reason to keep a smartphone, I know, lol. heyyy, my family is from Andalucía, I was considering learning Basque once I'm finished with Castellano through this thread I have determined a large portion of my issue here is because of emotional dysregulation, so I've thrown myself into researching how to improve my regulating abilities.

Glad I could help. The dumb phone I have an MP3 player, so maybe that’ll help. (I’ve mentioned before that I’m a fan of listening to podcasts.)

Yes the Iberian peninsula is quite a rich and diverse place, I was really delighted when I started learning about my ancestors and their fascinating history and language.

 

[atticus]

it has an mp3 built into it? how many songs can it hold? that's an intriguing thought. and yes, I agree! such rich culture and diversity, too. xD

 

[Yeshuasdaughter]

Fidget spinners rule.