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I never knew why I was different

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OmTareTuTare

New Member
Ive always been different from my peers in thought and socialization. I just thought i was a weird nerd with poor social skills. After doing a number of tests and correlating it with my wife I now suspect im on the spectrum. Im a very spiritual person and believe in things that are counter intuitive to my advancement in society.

Can anyone else relate to this systemic and structural abnormality?
 
Hi and welcome. What sort of things are you talking about? I do find that being truthful and saying it like it is can be problematic. I hope that you enjoy it here.

:herb::fourleaf::sunflower::herb::deciduous::palmtree::leafwind:
 
Honesty is a vulnerable but imperative part of any transformative process I've found. The best way I can explain it is I "don't fit in" but I'm able to "fake it" sufficiently to not be overtly characterised as being atypical neurologically speaking. The best way I can describe it is I've been diagnosed with a number of conditions from anxiety to depression to OCD to substance misuse disorder but reading more into the spectrum I can see a correlation that seems relatable than the other ones.
 
What spiritual things do you believe in that makes it counter intuitive to advancement in society?
Paranormal things? The metaphysical perhaps?
A lot of us here have interest in that and experiences with it.
I see your user name is the Green Tara mantra.

Welcome to the group!
l_ffefb976ea1da7e0c8973957ec5a111e[1].webp
 
SusanLR said:
What spiritual things do you believe in that makes it counter intuitive to advancement in society?
Paranormal things? The metaphysical perhaps?
A lot of us here have interest in that and experiences with it.
I see your user name is the Green Tara mantra.

Welcome to the group!
View attachment 68471
Click to expand...
Thank you, Arya Tara is my protector spirit and is a powerful emanation of the protector.

The metaphysical has in some cases stopped me engaging in "reality" as its seen
 
Through my teens in the '60s and young adult life in the '70s I knew I was different because of my social impairment. ASD was never diagnosed and because of my academic abilities it was just assumed that I was normal in other dimensions. But then, one does not know what one cannot comprehend and I could not voice the difficulties I had without missing the mark and externalizing my inner conflict. So I could relate and the systemic failure I see was because neither the adults in my life nor my peers thought to assist me.

That difficult part of my life was damaging such that I am seeking counseling to resolve it.
 
I am deeply spiritual and have spent my life exploring that area in search of the truth. In one of my evaluations a psychiatirst told me that the only thing he found was my belief in a higher power and that such a belief is a delusion but because it does not adversely impact my life in any way it is not of concern. I can accept that my belief may be delusional (I can provide no supported evidence that what I believe is fact) however it hurts no one nor infinges on anothers belief and it is beneficial to me. Further I don't need anyone to agree with what I believe so it's all good.
 
Hello and welcome to the forum.

I have always been different. There are a few reasons for that in my case. One of them is the reality that those of us on the autistic spectrum do in fact think differently than those who are not.

We think beyond linear constraints. It can be hard to describe. Most humans go from A to B then C. That can not see C until they reach B. The autistic can see C when still at A. We comprehend things linear thinkers do not. This makes it hard for us to be accepted into their confined world.

How best to get along with strictly linear thinkers is another story. I find it best to love all ways of being. Other can sense this authentic energy of love. They can be more self accepting.

John
 
We on the spectrum can definitely be open and aware to energy and emotions of not us, but of those around us. This can have a down side and l limit who l allow near me thru much self-reflection.
 
OmTareTuTare said:
Ive always been different from my peers in thought and socialization. I just thought i was a weird nerd with poor social skills. After doing a number of tests and correlating it with my wife I now suspect im on the spectrum. Im a very spiritual person and believe in things that are counter intuitive to my advancement in society.

Can anyone else relate to this systemic and structural abnormality?
Click to expand...
If you know anything about the God of Avraham,Yitzak and Yaacov in Torah and the new covenant, there is a neurological state called an open vision, I had one 21 years ago ,not knowing it meant Autistic neurology, a couple of years ago it dawned on me, that was Autistic neurology ,JHVH knows how to communicate with me
I'm in an even less tolerated group than people with autistic neurology ,a Christian Zionist with autistic neurology.
 
OmTareTuTare said:
Ive always been different from my peers in thought and socialization. I just thought i was a weird nerd with poor social skills. After doing a number of tests and correlating it with my wife I now suspect im on the spectrum. Im a very spiritual person and believe in things that are counter intuitive to my advancement in society.

Can anyone else relate to this systemic and structural abnormality?
Click to expand...
In the Hebrew faith it's said the spirit is at war with the flesh
 
Telepath John said:
Hello and welcome to the forum.

I have always been different. There are a few reasons for that in my case. One of them is the reality that those of us on the autistic spectrum do in fact think differently than those who are not.

We think beyond linear constraints. It can be hard to describe. Most humans go from A to B then C. That can not see C until they reach B. The autistic can see C when still at A. We comprehend things linear thinkers do not. This makes it hard for us to be accepted into their confined world.

How best to get along with strictly linear thinkers is another story. I find it best to love all ways of being. Other can sense this authentic energy of love. They can be more self accepting.

John
Click to expand...
Telepath John said:
Hello and welcome to the forum.

I have always been different. There are a few reasons for that in my case. One of them is the reality that those of us on the autistic spectrum do in fact think differently than those who are not.

We think beyond linear constraints. It can be hard to describe. Most humans go from A to B then C. That can not see C until they reach B. The autistic can see C when still at A. We comprehend things linear thinkers do not. This makes it hard for us to be accepted into their confined world.

How best to get along with strictly linear thinkers is another story. I find it best to love all ways of being. Other can sense this authentic energy of love. They can be more self accepting.

John
Click to expand...
Hi John. Im still trying to grapple with the notion of "thinking differently" and what that means to me and the wider community. I'm just starting on this journey of self discovery
 
OmTareTuTare said:
Hi John. Im still trying to grapple with the notion of "thinking differently" and what that means to me and the wider community. I'm just starting on this journey of self discovery
Click to expand...
The best I can describe it is that while NTs should be capable of formal operational thinking according to Piaget, the bulk of people fail at that as their emotional thought processes replace the analytical. In other words, they become dull witted. If I am like other Aspies, in operational thinking my mind will sort through the probabilities of what is possible by examining the underlying assumptions without any emotional bias. Rapid analysis was possible while NTs were still tying their shoes for the race that they lost before it started.

Of course, such ways of thought are also accessible to sociopaths, which is why the ranks of those successful in the business community show an enrichment of sociopathy.
 
Those with my belief system tend to believe that our own soul determines who and what we are while living on this mortal plane of existence.

That for better or worse, who and what I am is utterly of my own doing. All with the intent to learn something from it. I just wish that I had learned about being on the spectrum much earlier in life so I could have been in a better position to make the most of what I am, rather than stumble so much through life. Oh well...:oops:

I'm just grateful that I found out before I leave this existence. It allowed me to put so much of who I am into proper perspective.
 
Streetwise said:
If you know anything about the God of Avraham,Yitzak and Yaacov in Torah and the new covenant, there is a neurological state called an open vision, I had one 21 years ago ,not knowing it meant Autistic neurology, a couple of years ago it dawned on me, that was Autistic neurology ,JHVH knows how to communicate with me
I'm in an even less tolerated group than people with autistic neurology ,a Christian Zionist with autistic neurology.
Click to expand...

What do you mean by autistic neurology - in the context of faith?
 
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