im back! + feeling like i can “control” my autism?

[madisen622]

wow, i’ve been gone for two years. it’s crazy rereading my forums, a lot has changed.

i was just curious, does anyone feel like they can “control” their autism?

i can’t tell if ive just gotten good at masking or not, but certain things that bother me don’t as much anymore?

does anyone have any advice on this? thanks!

 

[Judge]

Welcome back. Good question.

Can I truly "control" my autism? I can mask my traits and behaviors to an extent, particularly depending on the circumstances of various social interactions.

Which perhaps some of us would smile and say,"I would take that as a no for an answer". For me it is neither a linear process, nor an absolute one. Where at times I may do better now, and fall on my face later at the same social event.

Can I "control" my autism? LOL...I'd prefer to respond, "I'm not sure".

But I can attenuate it at times. Hopefully enough to keep NTs from raising their eyebrows.

 

[madisen622]

Welcome back. Good question.

Can I truly "control" my autism? I can mask my traits and behaviors to an extent, particularly depending on the circumstances of various social interactions.

Which perhaps some of us would smile and say,"I would take that as a no for an answer". For me it is neither a linear process, nor an absolute one. Where at times I may do better now, and fall on my face later at the same social event.

Can I "control" my autism? LOL...I'd prefer to respond, "I'm not sure".

But I can attenuate it at times. Hopefully enough to keep NTs from raising their eyebrows.

thank you for the welcome back!

i think that’s a great way to answer the question. perhaps “im not sure” should be the answer to my own question as well.

i noticed in the past few years i think ive gotten better at hiding it. after my diagnosis i was left with more questions and i think i tried to avoid it. thank you for your comment letting me come to this realization.

 

[Rodafina]

@madisen622

certain things that bother me don’t as much anymore

Could you say a little more about what kind of things? Sensory things? Social interactions? Something else?

---

I do not feel like I "control my autism" at all, but I have learned to accept it. In so doing, I can better control my response to certain things and I have learned much better ways to take care of myself.

I have also learned how to better control my environment, (e.g. using headphones, hats, and glasses), and learned how to take breaks from things that cause a lot of sensory or social stress.

More than feeling "in control of autism," I feel that with better knowledge and understanding of myself, I have learned to adapt.

 

[madisen622]

@madisen622


Could you say a little more about what kind of things? Sensory things? Social interactions? Something else?

---

I do not feel like I "control my autism" at all, but I have learned to accept it. In so doing, I can better control my response to certain things and I have learned much better ways to take care of myself.

I have also learned how to better control my environment, (e.g. using headphones, hats, and glasses), and learned how to take breaks from things that cause a lot of sensory or social stress.

More than feeling "in control of autism," I feel that with better knowledge and understanding of myself, I have learned to adapt.

i feel like ive gotten better at reading social cues and learned to avoid things that cause me sensory issues.

after reading the comments what ive come to understand is the word isn’t “control” it’s “adapting.”

i was having trouble wording it and i felt like “control” was the best word.

 

[Judge]

It just makes me cringe to think of one social scenario in particular where I encounter the most difficulty of masking.

-Formal social occasions that revolve strictly around my employment. Which would often seem reminiscent of having to dance a jig over a minefield. Especially as a member of a branch having to visit our home office on the other side of the country. When saying the wrong thing could potentially cost you everything.

And I have a long memory of such things that may have lasted only seconds, yet I still painful to recall them like they happened yesterday.

 

[madisen622]

It just makes me cringe to think of one social scenario in particular where I encounter the most difficulty of masking.

-Formal social occasions that revolve strictly around my employment. Which would often seem reminiscent of having to dance a jig over a minefield. Especially as a member of a branch having to visit our home office on the other side of the country. When saying the wrong thing could potentially cost you everything.

And I have a long memory of such things that may have lasted only seconds, yet I still painful to recall them like they happened yesterday.

im sorry to hear, as the saying goes i feel like “we’re our own worst critic.”

besides, “being normal” is boring anyway.

 

[Neonatal RRT]

As I’ve gotten older, I am more aware of my symptoms, but also better at managing them. The symptoms are what they are.

 

[Crossbreed]

If it helps,...
I can anticipate triggers and steer clear of them to a certain extent.
Also, I can often pause my meltdowns to reconsider if I am reading the "troubling" situation correctly. Even if I am reading it correctly, doing so seems to alleviate my knee-jerk reaction.