Is life for Aspies actually getting harder now than it was in the past?

[watersprite]

the "I'm yet another human being who is looking for my opportunity to arrive"

^ this

It’s too complicated and I do not have enough information to definitively say, whether as you asked, life is getting harder.

My answer is that @Greatshield17 you’re asking questions that do not consider things thoroughly - a wider and deeper reflection would help.

 

[GadAbout]

Jeezes, people, be nice will you?

Life is tougher for aspies coming up now because the idea has been planted in them that they can't hold a job, they can't succeed in love, and they can't get along with others. So why try? I think this negative mindset is the biggest hurdle the younger autistic generation has to overcome.

 

[watersprite]

Jeezes, people, be nice will you?

Life is tougher for aspies coming up now because the idea has been planted in them that they can't hold a job, they can't succeed in love, and they can't get along with others. So why try? I think this negative mindset is the biggest hurdle the younger autistic generation has to overcome.

Sorry. I was doing my best to respond even though it is a difficult thing to do, in my opinion.

 

[Greatshield17]

Jeezes, people, be nice will you?

Life is tougher for aspies coming up now because the idea has been planted in them that they can't hold a job, they can't succeed in love, and they can't get along with others. So why try? I think this negative mindset is the biggest hurdle the younger autistic generation has to overcome.

Sorry. I was doing my best to respond even though it is a difficult thing to do, in my opinion.

Sorry I’ve been in bad mood these past few days, and am only now, feeling better now that something just recently swung on a positive direction. I wasn’t complaining about this stuff, I mean I was complaining in the sense that this stuff is bad and worthy of criticism but I wasn’t whining about my own situation. I just got angry over people misunderstanding my thread and I’d also be lying if I said I got a bit jealous hearing about an era where, *trigger warning* you could smack a bully back and not get punished for it.

I do feel better now and I am going strive find my future wife, make a living as an independent adult and have a family.

 

[OkRad]

Ask an older person. It was easier in some ways, harder in other. Yes, they could raise a whole family on one income AND send them to college! :-O On the other hand, if you were "different" you could be lobotomized and some of the elders DO KNOW actual people who were, not just rumours.

So it all depends on who you were, what class, what colour (I hate to say that, but in certain parts of the US, we ALL know it was awful) etc etc.

Life has ALWAYS been hard for the disabled. We have texts from ancient Greece telling us stories like a man fighting for his one little obol disability allowance ("The Cripple"), or others getting beat up (Iliad), etc ,etc. And literature since then is RIFE with poor and disabled sufferings........

That does not mean 100% and it does not mean wealthy don't suffer. Stats seems to show the fairy rich and the very poor and always the most likely to suicide. I find that odd.

 

[Thinx]

@Greatshield17 I wasn't intending to upset you, and I am not sure how I have? You posted a thread a while back about looking for a property. It sounds like you can't buy one as yet though?

 

[LadyS]

Short answer: As with ANY generation, some things get easier and some things get harder. Easier being that more people are aware and educated, and accepting than before. There is more help available and like others have said technology has allowed us to connect with others like us instead of being isolated. Harder in the sense that technology/internet may make it easier for triggering and more judgement other than the people around you. Also comes with the constant pressure to be "perfect" and have it together. But a lot of that pressure is something we might just be putting on ourselves as we are constantly bombarded by other people's idea of "happiness" when often they're faking it themselves.

I'm also of the opinion that older generations generally had the ability to handle some things better only because they didn't have as many options. And agree these days, people are more or less coddled. However, one might consider the reasons why which include that there are so many more "rules" these days in comparison, especially in child-rearing. Kids aren't as free to do as much as we used to when we were kids. Heavy criticism or even breaking laws is the consequence.

Personal note: just have to say that many of the complaints today's younger generation gets like being more impatient, rude, and entitled is a farce. For every young person there is someone older, who has also evolved with the instant gratification times who can be just as bad. Ask anyone in the service industry and they can tell you it's not relegated to just one age group.

 

[ForestGumpett]

Thing about getting older, well we’ve seen more football. How about those Packers eh? Love some cold beer, a cheese head hat and a snowy Packers game!

 

[GadAbout]

Thing about getting older, well we’ve seen more football. How about those Packers eh? Love some cold beer, a cheese head hat and a snowy Packers game!

What's going on with that Aaron Rodgers? He hasn't been showing up to practices, and doesn't want to play for the Packers any more. Isn't he contractually obligated?

 

[ForestGumpett]

What's going on with that Aaron Rodgers? He hasn't been showing up to practices, and doesn't want to play for the Packers any more. Isn't he contractually obligated?

Isn’t that the magic question, I’d like to know myself! I’m tired of people acting all special and stuff, play football or retire and let those that will play!

Everything is better without some things and especially sports! Geez, I don’t want to see labels I want to see blood! Lol.

 

[OkRad]

Isn’t that the magic question, I’d like to know myself! I’m tired of people acting all special and stuff, play football or retire and let those that will play!

Everything is better without some things and especially sports! Geez, I don’t want to see labels I want to see blood! Lol.

Then you must love hockey :-O

 

[Hylian]

Having lived in the past, life for most Aspies was much harder. Forums like this didn't exist. Heck, the diagnosis of Asperger's was a rare thing, reserved for the rich and urban. For 99% of us, all the shortcomings of Asperger's were considered voluntary choices to be antisocial. We didn't have a condition, we were just geeks and wimps and lazy and bad eggs. Or maybe retarded.

Younger people with autism/Asperger's are still mostly treated like they are voluntarily antisocial, and a lot of young people still struggle to get diagnosed. If someone is not "classically" autistic they still are going to struggle to have their issues recognized. I've been called lazy, retarded, etc. by teachers, family member, strangers, etc., have had my social issues mostly ignored by professionals my entire life, and so far I haven't met many autistic people my age that haven't had similar experiences. I really don't get the belief I see people have that this kind of treatment was mainly an issue for older autistics?

 

[GadAbout]

Younger people with autism/Asperger's are still mostly treated like they are voluntarily antisocial, and a lot of young people still struggle to get diagnosed. If someone is not "classically" autistic they still are going to struggle to have their issues recognized. I've been called lazy, retarded, etc. by teachers, family member, strangers, etc., have had my social issues mostly ignored by professionals my entire life, and so far I haven't met many autistic people my age that haven't had similar experiences. I really don't get the belief I see people have that this kind of treatment was mainly an issue for older autistics?

At least you know that autism exists. We all just thought, really believed, that we were somehow defective, unloveable, repulsive.

 

[Greatshield17]

Younger people with autism/Asperger's are still mostly treated like they are voluntarily antisocial, and a lot of young people still struggle to get diagnosed. If someone is not "classically" autistic they still are going to struggle to have their issues recognized. I've been called lazy, retarded, etc. by teachers, family member, strangers, etc., have had my social issues mostly ignored by professionals my entire life, and so far I haven't met many autistic people my age that haven't had similar experiences. I really don't get the belief I see people have that this kind of treatment was mainly an issue for older autistics?

My honest opinion is that in the past, we didn't get diagnosed with anything unless we really needed the help, which was generally reserved for lower functioning individuals.
We were just considered geeks, freaks, loners, eccentric, etc.
Technically, when asperger's was still a valid assessment, which fortunately it no longer is, I would not have made the cut because the parameters were different then.
What I really think is that the use of the labels has become more mainstream, and now that you are aware that your condition has a name, you like too many others use it as an excuse for failure instead of finding your strengths as those of us that went undiagnosed and found our own successes did in our past.

It really does look like people have a hard time accepting, or perhaps comprehending that Aspergers and the high-functioning Autism exists; even @Nitro implies it the quote above. People seem to want to believe we’re really just “lazy” or the like and that the only Autistic people that exist are those who truly need serious help, and are incapable of living an independent adult life like many of the older Aspies on here have. These people believe that if we just acted as though we were NTs, everything would be fine; but as I will show in my next post on here, Aspergers and high-functioning are part of who we are we cannot just ignore it and pretend to be who we aren’t, I’ve tried it (again, I’ll show this in my next post on here) and it doesn’t work!

 

[Greatshield17]

My honest opinion is that in the past, we didn't get diagnosed with anything unless we really needed the help, which was generally reserved for lower functioning individuals.
We were just considered geeks, freaks, loners, eccentric, etc.
Technically, when asperger's was still a valid assessment, which fortunately it no longer is, I would not have made the cut because the parameters were different then.
What I really think is that the use of the labels has become more mainstream, and now that you are aware that your condition has a name, you like too many others use it as an excuse for failure instead of finding your strengths as those of us that went undiagnosed and found our own successes did in our past.

Do yourself a favor and drop the "I'm a failure because I'm aspie" thinking and focus on the "I'm yet another human being who is looking for my opportunity to arrive" mindset.
It will take you a whole lot further to develop a positive outlook instead of your present negative one and it's close association to a psych label.
Negativity is an excavator that can dig very deep holes that can and will entrap you if you let them. Positivity can be used as a ladder to escape them if you happen to end up down in one. Or, if you are sharp enough, avoid them altogether.

@Nitro does this quote below sound like someone who thinks “I’m a failure because I’m Aspie?” I’ve tried pretending Aspergers isn’t part of who I am, it doesn’t work; Aspergers is part of who I am, and I’m not ashamed of it.

Well in regards to treatment I guess, but [dang it! I forgot what I was planning on originally saying here!] Aspergers is part of who I am, I don’t think it should be reduced down to symptoms, and besides wouldn’t it help to know how a person operates?

That being said, I do mask myself quite a bit; I’ve only twice I think, come out as that to people. I’d be lying if I said I was afraid of being judged and all that, but part of it is that, I don’t want to go to the opposite extreme of just parading it out there in an entitled sort of way; I want to express myself in a mature, civil, dignified sort of way, and I guess should look into figuring out how to do that right.

 

[ForestGumpett]

Then you must love hockey :-O

Yes, yes I do love to watch ice hockey! We played on the lakes when they would freeze up in the Carolinas. Charlotte Checkers was our team but that was in the 70’s.

 

[Greatshield17]

At least you know that autism exists. We all just thought, really believed, that we were somehow defective, unloveable, repulsive.

Young Aspies today can still believe that we are somehow defective, unloveable, repulsive; if we don’t know anything about Aspergers and the like beyond the mistreatment and misunderstandings we receive. I used to at one point worry/believe, that I was somehow akin to a psychopath, because I’ve heard that both Aspies and psychopaths don’t have empathy, and was led to believe that anyone who isn’t social must be a psychopath. While I later got over that fear, it was only until around the time that I was on here, that I discovered that Aspergers and Autism are actually the polar opposites of psychopathy, and better understood what Aspergers and Autism are, and what they can truly offer.

 

[Hylian]

At least you know that autism exists. We all just thought, really believed, that we were somehow defective, unloveable, repulsive.

I had the fact that autism could ever even be an issue in my family hidden from me almost my entire childhood and instead called an actual sociopath for struggling to understand other people, treated as if I have fundamental flaws that make me unlovable and unbearable for others to be around me, been outcasted by my peers, had teachers encourage other kids to actively harass me, etc.

A lot of people know autism exists now, but do most of those people get autism yet, understand autistic people beyond their flaws, and respect us? No. Being forced to feel and believe that you are unlovable and defective isn't limited to autistic people your age, and isn't even limited to people that dont know they're autistic. I am still failing to see how your age groups experience is different in this regard compared to any autistic person of any other age group.

 

[Greatshield17]

@Greatshield17 I wasn't intending to upset you, and I am not sure how I have? You posted a thread a while back about looking for a property. It sounds like you can't buy one as yet though?

I’ll try to explain it a bit later. Yes I do want to, and hope and pray and plan, to buy and own property, but it’s going to be a long time before I’ll gain enough money to buy anything; I hope and pray that it doesn’t take too long.

 

[ForestGumpett]

At least you know that autism exists. We all just thought, really believed, that we were somehow defective, unloveable, repulsive.

AMEN! I have several “invisible” diagnoses and people think if they are “discovered” when your an adult then you never had it. That right there is a moron way to think.

I have Ehlers-Danlos (yeah, and I get that look from doctors too they don’t know what it is either but it can kill you) and actually had a doctor tell me I couldn’t have it that only children have it....because it’s genetic. Well....I was a child once.

People, esp doctors can say the most unbelievable things. If most would humble themselves then they would be better doctors.