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knocks on the door/unexpected visitors

Same here, Smith. It's not just a matter of unknown people I don't want showing up: I don't want known people showing up either. This is an imposition on someone else's time, space & plans. My home is not a drop in centre or a public cafe.
 
I mean, unknown as in you don't know who they are until you open the door, or use the peephole.
And, OMG, have you ever had cops come to your door?? They knock like they are trying to break it.
 
Actually, Smith, they did come to my door once & caught me completely off guard: I was alone at home & it was about 9:30 at night & I remember it was the night of Oct.29, 2009. I'd just gotten in not 10 mins before when the pounding came. I looked through the peep hole & saw 2 cops (!!!). I hadn't called 911, there hadn't been a theft or other incident BUT since I hadn't spoken to my son, daughter or husband since much earlier, right away I thought something terrible might have happened to them.

Anyhow, I opened the door (they got a world class Aspie stare) & there was a really weird pause in time before they pulled themselves out of their own surprise & explained why they were there.

Turned out that my mother's younger sister has died in her apartment down town at around 5 ish. She was a long time divorcee with no kids & her ex lived across the country. She'd kept everyone's phone # in her head so it took them a long time to figure out who to call. they also weren't certain whether or not the place was a crime scene. Although the cause of death itself was natural (a massive heart attack) the place was a mess so they thought that perhaps thieves had alarmed her & she'd had a heart attack during the course of a robbery. Either way, they couldn't move her or disturb the scene so her body lay where it fell in that small, warm, closed, sealed apartment for all that time.

They needed me to go there right away & identify her & make arrangements for her remains. While the cops were talking to me, my mother & older brother & his wife arrived (they had taken my mother out for supper & were dropping her off). She became a shocked bawling mess. My brother drove me there &...well...amateur forensic pathology night began in earnest. I won't go into details out of respect for the more sensitive members here but it wasn't pretty.

Sooo....cops knocking at my door remains one of my less pleasant life experiences!
 
I hate people knocking on the door, my husband always answers it for me if he's here, I have this absolute rush of terror when someone knocks. The only time I'm okay with it is if it's the postman, I always look out the window over and over again around his usual delivery time if I'm home alone and I can't rest until he's either knocked or walks right past with no parcels.
 
Luckily I don't hear the doorbell (unless it's really, really quiet) upstairs, and since I'm there about 90% of the time I"m not bothered by it. Quite often I'll just not answer because of that.

But besides that, I don't have a lot of contacts that will come over and pound the door. The few people I do interact with I usually have it dealt with differently. I pick my girlfriend up at the station and my friend rarely comes over, we just meet up outside.

The only door that gets "breached" every now and then is my bedroom door if my parents need me. But they know I don't like it, so they usually wait till I come downstairs for dinner to ask whatever they want to know. It's a rare occaision where they burst in or knock my door.

Quite sure if I had my own place I at least wouldn't even plug in a doorbell. If people need me, they can do so on appointment. This also means that if I'm not interested, I can tell you before you come over.

Luckily the mail service has a decent system for the parcel delivery indicating a rather exact timeframe. I can leave my bedroom door open just in case I'm home alone, since quite often my parents would take the door anyway.

I do however have been thinking if I should get a doorbell with an alarm light instead of a sound. Makes it a bit easier for me to order food on delivery every now and then. Don't want to wake the entire house at 3 am.
 
When i was in my apartment and I heard someone in the hall, I would turn off the tv and be real quiet until it sounded like they were gone. I dreaded anybody coming to the door. My poor sister who we pretty sure is an aspie. found out the control for the heat for the whole building is in her closet, so she has people coming to her apartment wanting the heat turned up or down. I think she should have been informed of this before she moved in. Now she doesn't want to move because that was an ordeal in itself. My boyfriend said they shouldn't let other residents come and knock on her door, they should have someone from the building management do it, and only certain times of the day unless there is an emergency.
 
Pella said:
When i was in my apartment and I heard someone in the hall, I would turn off the tv and be real quiet until it sounded like they were gone. I dreaded anybody coming to the door. My poor sister who we pretty sure is an aspie. found out the control for the heat for the whole building is in her closet, so she has people coming to her apartment wanting the heat turned up or down. I think she should have been informed of this before she moved in. Now she doesn't want to move because that was an ordeal in itself. My boyfriend said they shouldn't let other residents come and knock on her door, they should have someone from the building management do it, and only certain times of the day unless there is an emergency.
Click to expand...

A neurotypical would probably parlay control over the heat for some advantage from the others...sexual favors maybe.
 
I agree wholeheartedly. Unless it's family or one of my few friends, I don't want to have to deal with people knocking on the door. I prefer my space to be my space.
 
My thoughts on this is that normally I don't mind the unexpected doorbell ring when I am expecting a package it makes me excited usually dollie stuffs or books. But normally if its anyone else I get annoyed. I don't even answer the door I hide and hope they go away.
 
I dislike unexpected visitors or even waiting for expected ones. Te knocking or doorbell ALWAYS makes me jump.
Good thing not many people know where I live lol.
 
Well, let's look at why my door gets knocked on:

64.7% - people from Shaw Cable wanting me to subscribe (very unwelcome)
31.4% - landlord for some kind of business (meh)
3.8% - drunk people who don't know where they are (almost as unwelcome as Shaw)
0.1% - the young woman who last week needed me to open a jar (I'm twice her age and not strong - ??)

The lesson: don't knock on my door. :timebomb:
 
I hate unexpected guests or people knocking. My husband's family likes to "drop by" unannounced. They live about an hour away so it doesn't happen more than once a year. I need to prepare for visits.
 
I kind of hate it. When I was raising my children the house was alive with sounds, so when someone came to the door it was no big deal. now the children are gone and we moved to a new house. Now when someone knocks, we look at each other and laugh, cause we don't want to answer the door. OMG, it could be a villian. Right now with the way of the world, don't answer the door by opening it. I talk through the glass and say 'what do you want'. Never open it unless you know and like the person. I think I rememeber this ryhme - "world world go away",,, That's how we feel now.
 
I actually don't mind knocks on the door, because it is usually the postman or the person I live with.
But I really hate unexpected visitors like friends or similiar people who like to enter the appartement, but normally this never happens.

At least in the past...

Since I have a new boyfriend and spend a lot of my time at his place, I must experience that a lot of people visit him without announcement. This is totally stressful for me and I always wonder about it. Why do people drop by announced? Is it really normal, because my friends never visit me without explicit invitation which I seldomly give.
 
My aspergers disables me. I live in an apartment building for disabled people with my daughter. Its actually very nice but thats not the point here.
so the other (I call them residents. They are disabled for other reasons and if they arent old senors then I can only guess what mental health issues these other people may have).
They are very nice people. But I think im the only aspie living here, I mean if there are other aspies here, they sure know how to leave me alone, which I appreciate.
I hate knocking on my door. It TERRIFIES me so much. The obly time I even go to the look hole is if I cant control the situation, like if my daughter and me are playing a game, im sure you can hear us through the door. So I have to acknowledge them at that point.
Like I said the other residents are very nice. But they're way too nice. Again not a bad thing, I just dont need everyone knocking on my door trying to give me stuff. I guess people think im poor and need help so they try to always give me their spare food. Which I really dont need, although its a very nice gesture. It usually ends up getting donated to the church 2 buildings down. I have a special diet and my daughter is weird in her choices of food.
Its really annoying when they try and talk to me in the hallway or just ****ing walk up amd pet my dog without asking (and they think cause "shes a lab" that we are automatically just the friendlyiest ****ing people in the world. Wrong.) I am always very friendly but I never stand and chat like they always do with eachother. I just have no time, energy or interest. Plus I do keep a schedule on paper that I really cant be bothered or see no reason to veer away from for unplanned social interaction. I guess what baffels me is, why havent they taken the hint? Its like they loiter in the lobby and the hallway. You never see me out there unless im passing through. Most times reluctantly. My daughter has taken her own liberty to growl at people on oir way through (shes 2) Sorry I dont want to be friends with everyone. And I really dont want my kid thinking its ok to talk to strangers.
About 80 percent of the time I dont wear a lot of clothes in the house im in my robe. So dont come knocking. I just want to be left alone and be comfortable in my home. I dont want a bunch of crazys standing outside my door making noises that scare the hell out of me...
I really do appreciate what they do, becausw I am aware the intent, bit when that damn door knocks. Aaahhhhhh!!!! I freeze with fear.
 
I don't like door knocking or phone calls. They're interruptions and annoy me. I don't really love having guests, either. When I *want* guests, I invite them over and enjoy them. What I hate most are the ones who either invite themselves over and tell me when they'll be here (I probably won't be!) or just show up at random, hoping to catch me at home. Apparently, such people think that my problem is that I don't like to ask people over, when the real problem is that I don't want *them* to come over.
 
I absolutely hate that. If my wife isn't home to answer the door and I'm not expecting anyone, I simply ignore it. I'm typically in my own world in my bedroom upstairs anyways, so (I hope, but I also don't care) they assume nobody is home. I do peak out the window to make sure they've actually left and the person banging at my door doesn't appear to be a threat.
 
About two years ago I was visiting my mother. Her landlord came over when I wasn't expecting her to have any visitors. I was sitting in the front room near the door, and when I saw a stranger out there I booked it to my little brother's bedroom and hid. I tell this minor story because of my stepfather's comments after the guy left. He said, "Man, he really freaked you out didn't he?" Yes, yes he did. Stop having visitors, preferably forever.
 
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