Lurking in the chat room

[Fridgemagnetman]

Does it matter what you're wearing when you're lurking ?
That might make it unacceptable.


(On second thoughts I don't want to know!)

 

[Hedgehog Instigator]

Wish there was a don't lurk but mixed feelings option

 

[Mathalamus]

i dont lurk, but, i talk an awful lot. i dont care if others lurk, because its not up to me.

 

[WildCat]

Tip: use the chat archive if you don't feel comfortable making any "noise". Your username won't pop up in the list, and you can see what's being discussed (though not in real-time, so just refresh the page) and whether or not you want to join in.

You can also wait a while while chat is still open and your username disappears eventually. I haven't fully tested it, but I believe this works as well.

 

[Questella]

I can't work out how the chat room works anyway...
Many private conversations going on at once and I can't work out who is chatting to whom.

Check it out when there's only 1-3 people. :3 Takes the guesswork out.

I'm not much on chat rooms. They were fascinating to me in the 90's for a minute. Anyway, lurk away. Anyone who cares that you're lurking needs to get a life (or at least a hobby).

Chat rooms in the 90s were the thing lol, I remember being obsessed with the AOL chatrooms, I don't even think they exist anymore.

 

[tree]

...I can't work out who is chatting to whom.

One thing that helps is Tagging.
If you click on the @ sign next to a person's name,
that directs your message to that particular person.

In case you are ever there and want some one to
know that you are talking to them.

 

[Blast off]

I will normally go into chat, say hi and if there's nothing of interest to me going on I log out. I'm on a phone so it's harder to lurk and don't know that I'd want to. It kind of bothers me that certain people always seem to be there, and makes me not want to participate in chat as much. I'm glad to know you do it though, I'll say hi knowing that at some point you'll see it lol.

 

[Questella]

Lurk Definitions

1. to lie or wait in concealment, as a person in ambush;
remain in or around a place secretly or furtively.

2. to go furtively; slink; steal.

3. to exist unperceived or unsuspected.

4. Chiefly Computers. to read or observe an ongoing discussion without participating in it,
as on a message board.

the definition of lurk

Lol now I'm seeing this and hearing Data defining the word, "snoop," in one of the first ST:TNG episode's. x3 lol love it

 

[SparklAng]

I have observed the chat room here on a number of occasions in the past. It was a small group that obviously know each other and are engaged in endless blather, small talk or petty squabbling. In all of which I have no interest. I don't do it in real life, why waste time doing it on the computer.

I go on the chat room sometimes. Perhaps out of boredom. I am quite new here, so I guess I want to get to know people. I like engaging with people. And sometimes it does feel like I am walking in on the middle of a conversation, but people say hi to me and it makes me feel more accepted. It sounds stupid, but although I agree and I dislike 'small talk' in general, sometimes I do get lonely. Online messaging in some ways feels more comfortable to me than talking in real life.

 

[Nightingale121]

Do you lurk in the chat room? Do you think it is acceptable or not?

I lurk in the chat room occasionally.
I think it is acceptable.

Normally I'll go into a chat and sit for a bit to see if there is anything I can really comment on, see what they're chatting about but if no such opportunity reveals itself I'll just get bored and leave. I won't go in and just start randomly talking out of nowhere because in my experience that's a good way to get bullied and teased and made fun of.

I don't just start talking after joining either.
However, people often greet others who join and replying to this is a good way to start a conversation.
If I am not interested in the current conversation, I'll get bored too.
I don't always leave though, but occasionally also keep the tab with the chat room open while doing something else. I lurk and have a look at the conversations from time to time then and join in whenever there's something I want to comment on.
I guess this is talking out of nowhere in a way because I often won't be shown as a chat participant in the list of the members in the chat room anymore by the time I start to talk again.
No one complained about it so far though.

I have observed the chat room here on a number of occasions in the past. It was a small group that obviously know each other and are engaged in endless blather, small talk or petty squabbling. In all of which I have no interest. I don't do it in real life, why waste time doing it on the computer.

Maybe it's NT practice

I think that this is actually true for me in a way, @Fridgemagnetman.
It's like some sort of safe social experiment and practice environment to talk to people.
Plus, I find it easier to "escape" or leave if it's enough for me in the chat compared to real life small talk conversations, for example.
It's not entirely comparable to real life obviously, but in a good and comfortable way.
It's like @SparklAng said:

It sounds stupid, but although I agree and I dislike 'small talk' in general, sometimes I do get lonely. Online messaging in some ways feels more comfortable to me than talking in real life.

Furthermore, I don't think that all of the chatting there is "endless blather, small talk or petty squabbling". I had some interesting conversations in the chat room before that I wouldn't describe as any of these. It depends on the people and the current topic.
So it's not only about the practice for me; I enjoy participating there as well if I'm in the right mood and like the topic.

Tip: use the chat archive if you don't feel comfortable making any "noise". Your username won't pop up in the list, and you can see what's being discussed (though not in real-time, so just refresh the page) and whether or not you want to join in.

I often do this before actually joining the chat room to see who's currently chatting and what the current conversation is about. Based on this I decide whether I actually join or not.
If the topic isn't interesting to me or if it's too busy or if there are people in chat I don't feel like talking to at the time, I'll just wait and check the archive later or another day to evaluate the situation again and make a new decision.

 

[BraidedPony]

I noticed that some people are in the chat room but dont join in the conversation(s). I assumed they forgot they were logged in and just got distraced by something else.
I didnt know it had a name. I lurk in real life, but I’m chatty online.

 

[pamelaperejil]

I don't have a problem with lurkers or lurking, but I rather wish there were an option of entering invisibly into the chatroom. I feel guilty when people try to be friendly and talk to me, and it's awkward to explain that I'm just lurking each time. Though it doesn't much matter, really. I'm not in there often.

 

[Progster]

I don't think that it should be obligitory to join in the conversation on entering the chat room, or for those already in the chat room to speak to those who come in. That would be the equivalent to walking into a bar full of chatting people, possibly strangers, and joining in the conversation. How many of us would be up to doing that?