My Adventures Going out Alone!

[JDartistic]

I've decided to start a thread about my social awkward adventures going out alone, hoping that my (often embarrassing) moments may actually inspire some of you to venture out more.

Okay, here's what happened today.

We had a terrible snow storm in DC & we had a long spell of awful cold, so today when the sun came out & the temp hit 40, I got the 'gotta get out of the house cabin fever' bug.

It took me 2 hours to get ready. It helps me to dress really well so I get the confidence of looking good.

I then got in my car cuz the sidewalks were still too icy & it was safer to drive...& drove to the thick of Georgetown at Wisconsin & M...where I found a parking spot (unheard of!) so I pulled in, despite the car behind me honking & flipping me off. BTW folks - in the city, we parallel park when the opportunity arises. I get so annoyed at these suburban SUVs who get annoyed by that. If you can't handle city traffic, stay in the burbs or at least don't be rude locals!

Okay, so after I park, I muster the nerve to go into a restaurant during the peak of brunch. I chose the nearest one which happened to be Old Glory.

I'm determined to meet new folks, so I walk to the bar where all the singles hang. I sit down with all my winter trappings cuz what else to do? There are 2 young guys next to me drinking beer & on my right is an older guy watching the NASCAR race on the bar TV.

The bartender ignores me & I start to fidget. I then feel weird cuz I got my gloves & coat on so I take them off but since there's only stools, I put them back on. It didn't dawn on me at the time that I should have put the coat across the stool like everyone else did, so I sat with my coat & hat on but did take off my gloves.

I smiled at everyone but the bartender still ignored me as she was taking to the young guys.

An excruciating 15 minutes passed. I pulled out my iPhone & played craps.

Eventually the bartender spoke to me & I ordered a mimosa & a pulled pork omelette.

I then tried to look around & start a conversation with someone. No one looked at me so I went back on my phone & played chess.

My food came & while I was eating, the older guy said, 'That looks good'. I then talked to him about the food & we talked about the NASCAR race. It lasted until the commercials ended & he was back engrossed in the TV. I felt awkward again.

I gobbled my food but my stomach closed up so I put my napkins in top of the plate so no one would notice I didn't really eat that much.

The bartender removed the plate & commented that I didn't eat anything. The manager then came over & asked me if I liked the food.

I said Yes but I wanted the check. (I was feeling uncomfortable now.)

I tipped well & left. I then got a little depressed thinking I messed things up, but then I got excited thinking I'd do this more often & record my experiences here, in the hopes of getting this right...one day!

My next adventure will be this Wednesday as I have reservations for dinner for one at Ruth's Chris at Dupont Circle.

Wish me well! And I've decided I'm very brave for doing this (I'm also safe at home now eating a grilled cheese sandwich)!

 

[Warmheart]

You have some remarkable courage, JD. Good for you for getting out and about and trying your best to engage in the pub. Trying to eat after managing a conversation with a stranger is challenging. I hear you! You did a super job all around.

 

[JDartistic]

Thanks Warmheart.

Let's see how it goes again on Wednesday. I have reservations! LOL

 

[JDartistic]

Pun intended!

 

[Judge]

This is good! It's sort of a "play-by-play" description of how socialization often appears to us in real time.

What may look like nothing to some likely means a lot to us. Thanks for sharing.

P.S.- I've never sat at a bar by myself before. It would be a big deal for me to try that.

 

[Suzanne]

Wow, that is sooo BRAVE of you! Just reading your account of going into a restaurant alone, got me panicking

If I ever am blessed to get a little car ie without license ( in France), I feel sure I could go shopping on my own, but to a restaurant on my own, whoa that takes a heck of a lot of courage. But the way you describe your experience, is just the kind of process I go through, but instead of how you are viewing it, I feel crushed and crumble.

Having said that though, I did manage amazingly to go to a concert by myself, but NEVER AGAIN.

The fact that you are seeing your embarrassing moments, as funny and going forward again, shows that you are on to a winner!

 

[Tia Maria]

Wow, that is sooo BRAVE of you! Just reading your account of going into a restaurant alone, got me panicking

If I ever am blessed to get a little car ie without license ( in France), I feel sure I could go shopping on my own, but to a restaurant on my own, whoa that takes a heck of a lot of courage. But the way you describe your experience, is just the kind of process I go through, but instead of how you are viewing it, I feel crushed and crumble.

Having said that though, I did manage amazingly to go to a concert by myself, but NEVER AGAIN.

The fact that you are seeing your embarrassing moments, as funny and going forward again, shows that you are on to a winner!

Suzanne, I had read your account of attending a Taylor Swift concert by your lonesome!! That was very impressive! I am have no hesitation about venturing out or doing things alone, but I would never go to a concert by myself! That is something hardly anyone would have the nerve to do, yet you did it! And you had a great time in the end ... dancing & enjoying the music! That was quite an achievement!

 

[Tia Maria]

I've decided to start a thread about my social awkward adventures going out alone, hoping that my (often embarrassing) moments may actually inspire some of you to venture out more.

Okay, here's what happened today.

We had a terrible snow storm in DC & we had a long spell of awful cold, so today when the sun came out & the temp hit 40, I got the 'gotta get out of the house cabin fever' bug.

It took me 2 hours to get ready. It helps me to dress really well so I get the confidence of looking good.

I then got in my car cuz the sidewalks were still too icy & it was safer to drive...& drove to the thick of Georgetown at Wisconsin & M...where I found a parking spot (unheard of!) so I pulled in, despite the car behind me honking & flipping me off. BTW folks - in the city, we parallel park when the opportunity arises. I get so annoyed at these suburban SUVs who get annoyed by that. If you can't handle city traffic, stay in the burbs or at least don't be rude locals!

Okay, so after I park, I muster the nerve to go into a restaurant during the peak of brunch. I chose the nearest one which happened to be Old Glory.

I'm determined to meet new folks, so I walk to the bar where all the singles hang. I sit down with all my winter trappings cuz what else to do? There are 2 young guys next to me drinking beer & on my right is an older guy watching the NASCAR race on the bar TV.

The bartender ignores me & I start to fidget. I then feel weird cuz I got my gloves & coat on so I take them off but since there's only stools, I put them back on. It didn't dawn on me at the time that I should have put the coat across the stool like everyone else did, so I sat with my coat & hat on but did take off my gloves.

I smiled at everyone but the bartender still ignored me as she was taking to the young guys.

An excruciating 15 minutes passed. I pulled out my iPhone & played craps.

Eventually the bartender spoke to me & I ordered a mimosa & a pulled pork omelette.

I then tried to look around & start a conversation with someone. No one looked at me so I went back on my phone & played chess.

My food came & while I was eating, the older guy said, 'That looks good'. I then talked to him about the food & we talked about the NASCAR race. It lasted until the commercials ended & he was back engrossed in the TV. I felt awkward again.

I gobbled my food but my stomach closed up so I put my napkins in top of the plate so no one would notice I didn't really eat that much.

The bartender removed the plate & commented that I didn't eat anything. The manager then came over & asked me if I liked the food.

I said Yes but I wanted the check. (I was feeling uncomfortable now.)

I tipped well & left. I then got a little depressed thinking I messed things up, but then I got excited thinking I'd do this more often & record my experiences here, in the hopes of getting this right...one day!

My next adventure will be this Wednesday as I have reservations for dinner for one at Ruth's Chris at Dupont Circle.

Wish me well! And I've decided I'm very brave for doing this (I'm also safe at home now eating a grilled cheese sandwich)!

This was very enjoyable to read JD! You did very well, & messed up nothing!

I have family in the area so am fairly familiar with DC & can attest that finding parking alone is very difficult! And I personally hate parallel parking!

In the future, consider asking the server for a container to go, or to wrap your leftovers to take home. Then you can enjoy the rest of your meal later! It's commonly done & there is no embarrassment in doing so. Maybe plan in advance to do this at Ruth's Chris since that will be quite a delicious meal to leave behind!

You have a fabulous attitude JD! The world would be a better place with more people like you. Your adventurous spirit & positive attitude are an inspiration!

 

[The Penguin]

Suzanne, I had read your account of attending a Taylor Swift concert by your lonesome!! That was very impressive! I am have no hesitation about venturing out or doing things alone, but I would never go to a concert by myself! That is something hardly anyone would have the nerve to do, yet you did it! And you had a great time in the end ... dancing & enjoying the music! That was quite an achievement!

I done a few concerts alone. Pretty much everything in my life I do alone including camping and hiking. Not everyone have the courage doing 20 KM hikes in one day and climbing mountains. At the end, the view is worth it. As I love to remember my trips, I also film them. Some of you seen my trips on YouTube and photos on my website.

 

[Progster]

Good job! I think I could manage to go into a restaurant and order food, but talk to a stranger? No, I could never do that. Perhaps I should also try to summon the courage to approach people more. Good luck on Wednesday!

 

[JDartistic]

Thanks everyone for the encouragement.

I'm already getting nervous about Wednesday but I plan to do it. Ruth's Chris is more fancy, though & I hope I'm able to eat cuz the food is awesome! (Doggie bag for sure).

One day this weekend I plan to go to another restaurant but haven't decided which one yet. I'm trying to find a local spot where I feel most comfortable. I also plan to do other things alone, like Blues Alley & the Kennedy Center.

More later

 

[AsheSkyler]

Ya know, I've ever only ate out by myself once. I was well engrossed in my "normal mask", so it went off without a hitch.

I think you did well. You didn't even flip the bad driver back or go extra slow to teach them a lesson in patience! (I'm not one somebody would want to be rude to on the road.) Don't fret about strangers having on-again off-again conversation. If they're really bored and needing company, they'll come to you. Or try to stay engaged after you approach them.

 

[Tia Maria]

I done a few concerts alone. Pretty much everything in my life I do alone including camping and hiking. Not everyone have the courage doing 20 KM hikes in one day and climbing mountains. At the end, the view is worth it. As I love to remember my trips, I also film them. Some of you seen my trips on YouTube and photos on my website.

Have you posted the name or a link to your YouTube channel? Those are a lot of wonderful things to enjoy Penguin, & an accomplishment to do them alone!!! It is great that you don't let yourself miss out on them just because you are going alone. You are also courageous. The hiking & camping alone is incredibly brave!! I truly admire you so much.

 

[The Penguin]

Have you posted the name or a link to your YouTube channel? Those are a lot of wonderful things to enjoy Penguin, & an accomplishment to do them alone!!! It is great that you don't let yourself miss out on them just because you are going alone. You are also courageous. The hiking & camping alone is incredibly brave!! I truly admire you so much.

It in my profile on here but I can share in this comment. WillyG Lounge - YouTube

 

[danielcollins]

That is very brave, well done you did really well.

The trick I've found is my perception before a situation like that - If I'm going in expecting to have some social interaction, I'm prepared for it. It's when I'm not expecting it, it's an issue.. like being caugh off guard and put on the spot.

It could be worth thinking 10 minutes before you go in, "I'm going to encounter other people who are going to want to talk to me - possibly" then you're mentally prepared for it.

 

[JDartistic]

I went to Ruth's Chris recently by myself & had another adventure! Whew!

I got dressed up (that always helps me feel confident) but timed it all wrong & got there 40 minutes too early. It was really cold outside - like 12 degrees so I parked my car near the restaurant & since I was early, decided to go into the place I parked in front of - Bistro de Coin which is another restaurant but w a large bar. So I got brave & went inside. My plan was to have a drink & then walk across the street to Ruth's Chris for dinner.

The bar was packed. It was happy hour & easily 2-deep. I wiggled my way to the bar but couldn't get any service. That's when I started getting anxious & went into what I call Time Distortion. This is when time slows & everything goes by excruciatingly in slow motion. It's a bad feeling

But the bartender eventually saw me & I got a glass of champagne. I still had my coat & hat on, my gloves & stuff but paid her as I ordered & then moved away from all the peeps who were jostling me. I then got self conscious about still having my coat on but there was no where to put it!

The time distortion got unbearable & I found myself doing exactly what I shouldn't do - I had backed myself into a dark corner & stood alone in a busy bar - looking weird & terrified with my winter garb still on. I knew then I had to go! I made a b-line for my car, got in, turned on the heater & self-bashed. Only 20 minutes had passed! I was still too early but then it dawned on me...dah, should have gone directly to Ruth's Chris!

I processed in my car for another 10 minutes until the time distortion passed. I then went to the restaurant for dinner.

The place is fancy w great service, so I was ushered in & they offered to take my coat! What a relief. I then sat at the bar. I was feeling awkward but it wasn't that busy - only a couple folks - & the bartender approached me immediately. He was really friendly & put me right at ease. There was also a TV on, but not too loud. That's good cuz I get sucked in if its too loud.

I had a lovely meal there & the bartender was real chatty with all of us & even got us all talking to each other! It was truly a nice experience. I felt comfortable & enjoyed myself. So I put this place on my list as friendly & that I'd be back. The bartender made all the difference.

I succeeded. My next adventure is this weekend - out to dinner w a friend but out alone after to see a show at the Kennedy Ctr.

 

[JDartistic]

One more thing - the only draw back to Ruth's Chris is that they are expensive. I got an appetizer crab cake with potatoes & creamed spinach, 1 wine & my bill was $90 (not including tip).

The experience made me think of checking out hotel lounges & higher end places cuz the good service made me feel better.

 

[JDartistic]

Autistic moment! Just happened now!

I was feeling so confident so tonight I went out to cafe Dupont thinking could handle it.

This is real life!

 

[Judge]

Maybe that should be on my "bucket list". To sit at a bar all by myself. Funny to think of so many basic things I've never done.

I'd like to ride a horse some day too...

 

[JDartistic]

So what happened is that I sat in the corner next to this Valley girl voice that I despise & this really cool cat came & said, 'is this seat taken?' As I read the Chesapeake Bay magaZine.

No I said! Please sit. But I think he was after the valley girl entourage that was next to us. Still, I struck up a conversation w him.