My mom just doesn't get it

[I love roses]

We just hope we can keep ours from severe harm. He hurt himself badly and had to go to hospital. I agree with you. The perfect child people are evil to me. There are some want only blue eyes or blond hair or want an intellectual edge over all other humans. Arnold Swartznagger wanted to clone his pet.

 

[midlife aspie]

I do question why Autism Speaks spreads fear. I have an Autistic grandson. Nothing on there gave me anything I could use. We need an in-home caregiver to teach my daughter how to handle him and help him, like NOW! He is smashing his hands through glass windows and is 6. My daughter now thinks she has to move and leave her only support person, her boyfriend, to go to a metropolis to get help. She isn’t low income. We are moving way to slow and losing time. We are told we have to help him early but no one helps us find out how, or who, or where,nor how to afford it.

Where do you live? Here in Illinois there is a program called Early Intervention. The costs are income based and the services include in home evaluations, counseling, therapies, and placement in Early Childhood Education with the local public schools. Check with your state human services department to see what is available for you (if in US).

 

[I love roses]

Where do you live? Here in Illinois there is a program called Early Intervention. The costs are income based and the services include in home evaluations, counseling, therapies, and placement in Early Childhood Education with the local public schools. Check with your state human services department to see what is available for you (if in US).

My daughter claims their isn't anything in her town andnis considering moving. Home intervention was supposed to come but never showed up or returned calls. Doctor not following through. Told doctor to go back to doctor and insist he try another one.

 

[Bella Pines]

She said that Autism Speaks spends a lot of money in their cause so therefore it must be something worth supporting.

Tell me. Have you ever tried "phrasing it in a different way"? Or repeating yourself? Have you ever thought, oh they'll "get it" eventually? Have you ever waited for them to wake up, see the light and finally understand your logic?

Me too.

But they don't. And they won't.

I'm going to tell you something that will save you 20 years of your life.

THEY WILL NEVER GET IT.

No matter how many ways you try to explain it, no matter if you present facts, numbers or graphs, no matter if they say "yeah sure, I understand", they don't and they won't.

I spent my 20s and 30s truly believing that neurotypicals could be taught to think logically with enough patience and time. But they can't. They can briefly emulate logic, in the same way that we can briefly emulated flighty and random emotions. But it drains them and is a continuous effort. And just as we then revert to type and retreat off alone, they then go back to following the herd, with no capacity or desire for independent thought.

This is so hard to accept, but the sooner you really acknowledge this, the happier you will be. And the more you will accept the peculiar neurotypicals in your life, who I'm sure live you dearly.

 

[LearnedCoward]

Maybe it needs a thread all its own. That guy really made me mad and he would not have cared not one bit. No one seems to care about adult autism coping problems. It is as if it has not been invented. Do we have to invent it ourselves????

Yeah, he seemed unnecessarily dismissive.

But such is my life right now. I get a lot of that.

Sorry you're going through this.

 

[I love roses]

Tell me. Have you ever tried "phrasing it in a different way"? Or repeating yourself? Have you ever thought, oh they'll "get it" eventually? Have you ever waited for them to wake up, see the light and finally understand your logic?

Me too.

But they don't. And they won't.

I'm going to tell you something that will save you 20 years of your life.

THEY WILL NEVER GET IT.

No matter how many ways you try to explain it, no matter if you present facts, numbers or graphs, no matter if they say "yeah sure, I understand", they don't and they won't.

I spent my 20s and 30s truly believing that neurotypicals could be taught to think logically with enough patience and time. But they can't. They can briefly emulate logic, in the same way that we can briefly emulated flighty and random emotions. But it drains them and is a continuous effort. And just as we then revert to type and retreat off alone, they then go back to following the herd, with no capacity or desire for independent thought.

This is so hard to accept, but the sooner you really acknowledge this, the happier you will be. And the more you will accept the peculiar neurotypicals in your life, who I'm sure live you dearly.

Herd followers drive me insane, especially herd following activists that catch a wave of frenzy. I want to yell, think, think, think, analyze! Where is your brain?!! But any herd follower drives me nuts, really. I joke that alliens came down and sucked out their brains. They look like they should be zombies in a movie.

 

[Mary Anne]

Ok, I am not supporting this organization, but explaining WHY it works for parents. Do not start get angry with what I have to say here.

NTs never know what it’s like to live life as an autistic. But Autistics have no clue as to what it’s like for a parent of an out-of-control young autistic either (unless they are parents of one themselves). It’s exhausting, isolating, frustrating, expensive, challenging beyond many parents abilities. It can be nightmarish. It can be heartbreaking. The parents do not know where to turn for help. It’s a 24/7 job to care for special needs children. Some parents can do it, but MANY can not cope. Parents are prone to exhaustion, depression, anger, hopelessness, fear, and anxiety just like the rest of us. These are the parents who find solace in Autism Speaks. Doesn’t this make sense??? It does to me (I am not a parent, and I have autistic traits myself).

These parents find other parents in which to form understanding friendships, and networking for coping and navigating the autism schooling/therapeutic paths their children’s lives will follow. Autism Speaks (AS) is where parents find out how to estate plan for the future of their child’s life. It’s a place where maybe they can get some daily relief from the pain, suffering and exhaustion a parent might have. It’s a place to learn about autism from the NT side. Parents are desparate for any kind of help, and Autism Speaks is the first place they reach out to.

I read the entire AS website inside and out in initially learning about my own autism. I found it helpful. That’s not the only source of info of course, but it makes total sense to ME why Autism Speaks continues to be the first go-to source for parents/ families trying to raise a severely autistic child. Where is the alternative organization, run BY people with autism, with the financial backing, and world wide marketing/branding that AS has? Until that happens, parents will continue to support Autism Speaks.

 

[Ylva]

According to Amythest they spend most of their funding on their own salaries and on advertisement for themselves. Most of the rest goes to researching eugenics.

Maybe you could start off with showing your mother that video of Allison Singer talking about driving off a bridge with her autistic daughter in the car while the girl (who is about 7 at that point) wanders helplessly in the background, and work your way up from there until she's all "HOW DARE YOU WHAT KIND OF MONSTER DO YOU THINK I AM I DON'T SUPPORT THIS".

There are videos out there that will make you sick, from a middle-aged mother ABAing her thirty-year-old son to the Judge Rothenberg monsters literally zapping a kid to death. I haven't watched the last one, but there was quite an uproar about it a couple years back. I think it lasted all of two days.

 

[Erik Bennet]

i agree with speaks i want a cure so i can start living my life autism is preventing me from getting my goal i desire and i want it cured nothing of my autism is my personality at all im a hard worker autism makes me look lazy if it wasnt for autism id have children car and good job

 

[Ylva]

i agree with speaks i want a cure so i can start living my life

But that is not the kind of cure they are going for. To do that, you would have to lower your stress levels to managable at all times and I don't think you can do that around ableists. What $peak$ tries to do is to find a way to abort autistic fetuses and ABA the living sht out of the ones who have the nerve to be born. You need a better strategy.

 

[Erik Bennet]

But that is not the kind of cure they are going for. To do that, you would have to lower your stress levels to managable at all times and I don't think you can do that around ableists. What $peak$ tries to do is to find a way to abort autistic fetuses and ABA the living sht out of the ones who have the nerve to be born. You need a better strategy.

oh then i disagree. i thought more a miracle pill to swallow and then autism is suddenly gone. then they are not the right cure i sorry i spoke, i never really looked into them before i commented