My parents don't believe me

[GypsyMoth]

@hi_i_like_cats, I sympathize with you. Do try and find some alone time when you can stim. They don't have to know. (& if someone on the internet had told me that when I was your age, it would have set my mom off in a tizzy. I hope that saying, "they don't have to know," doesn't cross any parental boundaries but instead allows you to give yourself permission to do things you need to do in order to deal better with your situation.)

Do you have any long-time friends you could take with you, or do you know of any other autists where you go to school? The former could help with the childhood evaluation (I'm assuming?) and with the latter, you could form a support/mentorship relationship. A friend of mine with whom I've recently shared my research into autism with has taken a keen interest in talking with me about it and pointing out things that I just normally do as a matter of course that strongly stand out to her as common traits of autism. It's been a great help because it's outside validation of the things I have been reading--she notices things I haven't shared with her.

Also, keep in mind that if you do find a specialist in autism to talk with, they should be trained in what to look for. Now, not all are specialists, but someone who's been in practice a number of years and has a good online reputation might be worth seeing.

I can understand about being hesitant to see anybody. I've been looking for a specialist myself, just for counseling regarding a problem. If I can find anyone, I am not even sure where I would start. It takes a lot to reach out to anybody and even then it's only office staff who respond back, so another new connection would have to made later. It's just a process. I hope you stick with it.

 

[Owliet]

I told my parents that I suspected that I may be Autistic. They launched into a long rant about how I was reading too many books and letting them pollute my mind. They said that there was nothing wrong with me and I'm perfect. They made it seem like autistic people are damaged goods. They said I was causing problems for myself. It was very horrible to listen to. I wanted to stim so bad, but I knew I'd get in trouble if I did.

This isn't the first time something like this has happened. I told them I was probably lactose intolerant. I told them that I had depressive symptoms. They didn't believe me until something bad happened in both cases. Now I don't think I'll ever be able to get a diagnosis because I won't have anyone to talk about my childhood behaviours during the assessment.

Some parents can be in complete denial about their child being ASD /or any other disability. In some ways it is understandable — a lot of ableism can come about, so parents dont want their kid to be faced with that. but this is detrimental Overall. My mom found it difficult to accept at first that I was ASD, despite suspecting that I was. When there was an official confirmation, she made out that i was unacceptable. Now, after a few years she’s turned around and is more accepting of me. I’m sorry for you, I don’t have much to add and I hope that things change for you.